Family by Choice
by SesshomaruFreak
Summary: When an unusual conversation and a wounded slayer result in the uniting of 2 packs, how will fate be altered? .-. Nominated by a reader for the Best Romance category in the 2nd Quarterly Inuyasha Fandom Awards, run by FeudalConnection.
1. Unusual Circumstances

We don't own Inuyasha or characters.

A tag-work with timewaster123456789, brilliant lady. Check out our pack :)

Family by Choice

Warnings: Not much, language, Sess being Sess. Head-hopping but should still be easy enough to follow. The InuSess yaoi is slow-burn. Very slow burn, but the ride is gonna be fun ;)

* * *

Rin hadn't been able to stop trembling since the incident earlier in the day. The Wolf demon may have saved her but her memories of _that _day tormented her. Most of the time she could suppress her terror but seeing the dark demon again had brought it all back.

Sesshomaru could see Rin shaking, it disturbed him, more so for the fact that she had disobeyed his order to stop, though he could smell the sweat of her effort. Perhaps he should not have forgiven the Wolf so easily.

Rin bit her lip as she tried to obey her Lord's order. But it was to no avail.

They had just stopped for the night, and Sesshomaru was a short distance away, looking up at the moon like he sometimes did. Rin crept around behind Ah-Un where Jaken couldn't see and wrapped her arms around her knees. The effort of not crying made her bite her lip harder until she could taste blood.

She had forgotten about a youkai's sharp sense of smell. At the smell of blood, Sesshomaru bolted to the girl's side. Though it would take torture in the extreme make him admit it, the events of the day had unnerved him; he couldn't say with certainty that he would have been fast enough to save her had Koga not been there.

It was a tiny sliver of doubt but enough to make him overreact. When Sesshomaru appeared around Ah-Un, Rin gasped and hurriedly brushed away a few tears that had managed to escape, licking away the incriminating blood on her lip. The demon was staring down at her, and she felt ashamed that she'd gotten his attention without reason.

She turned away slightly, whispering, "I'm sorry for disturbing you my Lord. It won't happen again."

"Why were you bleeding?" he asked, worried enough to offer a full sentence. He didn't ask about the obvious tears, as the question would be deeply offensive, in his view. Rin hesitated, unsure of how to answer.

"I… I bit my lip. I was trying to keep from crying, but it didn't work," she said sadly.

Sesshomaru almost cocked his head, but refrained. "Why?" he asked.

Rin blinked a few times. Which part was her Lord asking about? But the fact he was asking at all surprised her into a rambling answer.

"Ummm, I was crying because of what happened earlier, I was trying to keep from crying so I wouldn't disturb you, and I don't know why it didn't work."

Sesshomaru's eyes hardened, his version of shaking his head. He contemplated for a moment then deigned to give a full answer, with luck it would prevent problems in the future.

"Your effort is futile, I can smell it regardless. If I'm bothered then I will leave until you calm down." Rin saw how the golden eyes hardened, but she would never be afraid of her Lord.

"You being here _is_ calming me down. I feel a little better. It was just… seeing that demon… Koga? Seeing him reminded me of that day you saved me from the wolves." Sesshomaru's eyes widened slightly at that.

He addressed the pertinent part first, "If there is a reason to believe he's a threat, he will die. All he did was kill the demon attacking you."

Rin nodded her understanding, and tried to explain. "I know, my Lord. I know you would protect me if he was a threat. And I am grateful he defended me earlier. It's just the memories… they still affect me. I'm not strong like you, Lord Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru locked eyes with her, carefully scented for Jaken and finding that he hadn't yet returned spoke. "You should _know _that no one is strong all time. I certainly don't expect such from a human."

Rin gazed up at the powerful youkai, innocently refuting his words.

"_You_ are, my Lord. Nobody is ever stronger than you."

"Do not insult me," Sesshomaru hissed coldly.

Rin was taken aback by the cold tone, "I did not mean to insult you, Lord Sesshomaru. I was being honest. I really didn't think there was anyone stronger than you."

"Liar!" his eyes narrowed. He smelled her fear however and, still not scenting Jaken, relented.

"Do you not remember how we met?" he asked with a hint of a sneer, offense expressed as anger. Rin's eyes rounded as she remembered.

"Oh," she said in a small voice. "You… You were hurt." Not wanting to make the youkai any more upset, she tried to explain her reasoning. "But… That doesn't really mean someone was stronger than you. I thought if someone hurt you that badly, then, being stronger, you must've killed them. You never did tell me what happened for you to be in the woods like that. I never asked because I thought I'd upset you."

Sesshomaru quietly suppressed his rage, it was more from humiliation than actual offense anyway. He remembered Inuyasha's demon form unconscious under his blade and met Rin's eyes with effort.

"I've avenged myself but," he sniffed the air for anyone else, "that doesn't change what happened. Showing weakness is indeed disgusting, but I must accept your weaknesses as you accepted mine."

Rin tilted her head, absorbing the youkai's words. "I'm glad you got to avenge yourself, my Lord. And I'm glad you accept me the way I am." She wanted to hug him but knew that gesture would surely be rejected, so she settled for sending him a bright smile.

Sesshomaru warmed at the smile though he showed nothing. "I do not expect you to be strong all the time."

Rin saw the barely-noticeable difference, doubting anyone else would've noticed. Really, it was just that he was frowning a bit less.

"Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru. I'll still try, but it's good to know you won't be too disappointed in me if I fail." She wanted to say that she didn't expect _him_ to be strong all the time, either, but held her tongue, knowing_ that_ would definitely offend his regal sensibilities.

He nodded sharply and hoped his eyes conveyed the appreciation he couldn't express. He hoped this went a ways to repaying the old debt.

Rin was surprised to see what looked like gratitude in the youkai's eyes, unsure if that was even what she was seeing. She beamed up at Sesshomaru, hoping to get the conversation on a lighter level. "Where did Master Jaken go, my lord?"

He almost didn't answer out of habit but said, "He said he had some contacts that may know Naraku's location." he noted her shiver and misinterpreting the source of her fear looked away.

"I will take you to stay with the humans if you wish."

Rin tilted her head, wondering why her guardian would be making this offer. Had she said something wrong? She ran over their conversation, biting her lip when she remembered that the demon _had_ gotten rather short-tempered with her.

"I would rather stay with you, Lord Sesshomaru. I'm sorry I made you angry earlier. You...you do know I don't want to go to humans. I mean, the ones in Inuyasha's group are ok, but I'd still rather stay with you."

"You're scared. You would be safer with the hanyou's group," disgust tinged the word.

Rin felt trapped, she could hardly lie, and she did prefer to stay, but the truth would not help with her Lord's already dark mood.

"I know you'll keep me safe," she tried and sensing her Lord's annoyance added, "I wasn't scared about myself."

Sesshomaru's frown deepened. "Then what, exactly, are you afraid about?"

Rin squeaked and looked away, "I uhh...what would I do if you...left me alone again?"

Her lips trembled and the words poured from her, echoing their earlier conversation, "I said I'm not I'm strong like you. I don't want to be alone again! I don't want to have to steal or wonder if a human will kill me before the demons eat me or..." tears streamed down her face and Sesshomaru, utterly at a loss for what do, simply walked away.

It solved a surprising number of problems in general and in this case the problem would either stop crying and follow or eventually be out of earshot. He'd return later of course and...

"Don't walk away from me!" Rin shrieked. He froze, head whipping around to stare at Rin, all tears and snot, quivering in fear.

He stared at the diminutive human, who suddenly ran at him and began beating his leg. Tears still poured down her face as she wailed, "You always do that! You always wa-walk away! Why? Why do you do that?"

_Oh, gods. What now?_ he thought to himself. If he tried walking away again, Rin would surely become even more upset. But what else was there to do? He certainly couldn't solve this with violence.

He glanced around for witnesses, or any form of help, and finding neither, sighed to himself. Ok, how did other people deal with crying kids?  
Unfortunately, only one set of people came to mind - his brother and his nakama.

As loathsome as the thought was, maybe the interactions he'd witnessed could be useful. What would they do in this situation?

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then carefully laid his hand on the sobbing girl's head. "It is...ok, Rin."

Rin stared at him, "H-how can you say that? You always walk away and y-you could die and I'd be lost and y-you don't even care if I-I'm here or not and..."

A realization struck her young mind like a bolt of lightning. An innocent question 'would you remember me' brushed off and she'd rarely thought about it since. The memory suddenly seemed horrific and she pulled away from her Lord.

"My lord might not care if I live or die but I'm...not that strong..." she sank to the ground whimpering. "I don't want to be alone." she repeated as though he'd start caring if she said it enough. She knew he wouldn't, never did, never would but she didn't know what else to do.

Sesshomaru looked to the heavens for salvation before looking back at his sweet ward. Annoying as she was at times, she was _his_, and it was his fault that she was so upset.

But he'd rather do anything than this. He'd even rather deal with his temperamental brother than deal with this.

Damn it all to Hell, anyways.

Scanning the area once again, he slowly kneeled next to Rin. He lowered his hand from her head to her back, cautiously rubbing a circle. She sniffled and looked at him with a blend of surprise and hope.

Ok, so circles were good. He kept rubbing gently as he spoke. "Rin, after all this time, do you really think I do not care? I am a demon, it is not in my nature to be...so human. But you are aware I want you at my side?" He knew he wasn't explaining well but how to do so? Even if he could bring himself to say the words she was young and human she wouldn't understand.

"Then wh-why would you not remember me if I die?"

Sesshomaru's eyes widened, this again, "I told you not to ask such silly questions."

"Th-then don't lie and say you care."

"Lie?!" he hissed - he'd never done such a thing, especially not to her. He felt her tremble under his hand and looked down to see her, so small and frail, and an overwhelming urge to 'fix this', to make her stop hurting, hit him as strong as if she'd been captured and needed rescue.

He may not have lied but he also hadn't given her a proper answer. He lowered his voice, "I wouldn't want to remember."

Rin felt like crying again, but she was getting exhausted. "Why not?"

The youkai was silent for a moment before answering quietly. "It would hurt to remember."

Rin's eyes widened in shock and she instinctively reached out before stopping herself. That didn't make sense, even when she'd met him wounded in the forest it taken her a bit to realize that he wasn't simply resting as he showed no pain. There was a reason she thought him impervious and yet...

"You don't care about that when you fight," she said.

"That fades," he whispered. "Jaken approaches." The hanyou scum and his pack were with him as well. Why? Jaken wouldn't have gone to them so they must have sought him out. Why?

Sesshomaru rose to his feet and set his features in a stern, disapproving mask. Voices began to reach him; apparently, Jaken was making his opinion of Inuyasha clear. "How dare you follow me, you worthless half-dog?!"

The unmistakable sound of a strike followed, then the little kitsune's voice. "I told you he's a bully - you'd do well not to provoke him."

The approaching group emerged from the trees, and Sesshomaru frowned deeply. It appeared that there'd been a fight of some sort, as everyone in the group bore wounds and looked exhausted.

He could smell blood and death thick in the air. The pungent reek of human sweat mingled with demon musk. Inuyasha drew Tetsusaiga and took a defiant stance despite the fact that he obviously could barely stand much less fight.

The monk rushed forward and fell to his knees, the bundle in his arms fell to the ground and he saw it was the body of the demon slayer. It stank of poison and death.

"Please," the monk pleaded and looked up at him. There was blood running from a cut on his head and he wasn't even trying to hide that he was on the verge of tears. Why were humans invariably crying, such tiresome creatures.

He turned away.

"Idiot I told you that wouldn't work," the hanyou panted, "This is the only thing he'll listen to." He felt Tetsusaiga at the back of his neck.

Sesshomaru easily leapt away, spun and lashed out with his poison whip. He intentionally let it fall short, the weak half-demon didn't look like he could take another hit. He was proven right a moment later when Inuyasha tried to rush him and stumbled, bracing himself with his sword in the ground.

"Bastard!" he gasped. The monk pulled the covering from his hand and Sesshomaru leaped back out of range.

The monk tried to struggle to his feet, failed, "Please!"

Ugh, how he hated neediness. Inuyasha looked at his companions and growled. He forced himself to stand on his own feet and threw Tetsusaiga at Sesshomaru.

"You can have the fucking thing just revive Sango," his voice shook. Why was everyone so emotional today, was it the moon?

"I said I no longer want it," Sesshomaru hissed.

"For fuck's sake Sesshomaru!" Inuyasha yelled.

Rin ran up from where she had been hiding from the wind tunnel, Jaken shrieked for her to come back.

"My Lord save her please, you can, right? Like you saved me?"

He looked down at her then back to the enraged half demon and drew Tensaiga, "It's not reacting. The woman has been poisoned badly. If I _was_ to bring her back she would only die again and quickly."

"We can get a cure like we did for Jaken!" Rin yelped happily.

"There wouldn't be time."

"If we did get a cure, could you revive her after we had it?" Miroku asked latching on to the sliver of hope.

"Perhaps." it was as close to 'I don't know' as he would utter in front of a hanyou.

The young kitsune and Rin both piped up at the same time.

"Jinenji!"

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow, but apparently, everyone else knew the name. Even Jaken nodded. "Jinenji would indeed likely have something to counteract the poison. We are only about a mile from his farm, me'lord."

Inuyasha nodded wearily. "Ok, I'll go."

Sesshomaru watched as his brother retrieved Tetsusaiga, watching him warily. Then Inuyasha turned and summoned the fiery neko from the little basket on the priestess's contraption. "C'mon, Kirara. I know you're hurt and tired, but we need to go to Jinenji's place to try and save Sango."

The tiny two-tail leapt out of the basket and flared to her larger form, big red eyes focusing on the slayer's body with a deep whine.

Sesshomaru frowned, seeing that the neko bled from half a dozen wounds. She would likely collapse on the trip.

"I will go."

"What?" Inuyasha snapped, instantly suspicious "Why?".

"I see no reason to allow a demon to die to save a human. It's an animal it has no choice in the matter. I also do not intend to waste my time here and I'm already uncertain if the human can be saved even without making two trips," Inuyasha's jaw went slack at the monologue. "Jaken, you know the way?"

"Yes My lord," Jaken was already holding on tight.

"Rin if there is any danger take Ah-Un, they won't be able to protect you." With that he was gone.

"Well that went better than expected," Miroku tried to laugh.

Inuyasha frowned, "Yeah too easy..."

"Don't be so suspicious," Kagome admonished.

Inuyasha just shook his head certain this was going to cost them something. He looked over at Miroku who had given up on trying to keep the mood light and was nuzzling Sango's body like a dog with its dead master. Whatever the cost, if it saved Sango it'd be worth it and Miroku would gladly pay. If.

Sesshomaru flew to the farm with Jaken pointing the way. A huge half-demon was outside in the moonlight, tending the herbs that grew best in the darkness of night.

He described the scent of the poison, and the half-demon nodded, handing over a pouch of medicine.

"Tell them I hope everything's ok," Jinenji said in a soft, rumbling voice. He nodded and took off.

He arrived back at the little gathering and handed the pouch over to Inuyasha, who murmured, "Thank you."

He drew Tensaiga. "Stand back."

"Miroku," Inuyasha said softly when he made no move from where he clutched her body to him.

Sesshomaru grabbed the monk, pried him from Sango and tossed him aside. Inuyasha growled but settled for restraining Miroku while his half-brother swung Tensaiga. Time seemed to slow and he held his breath, Miroku shook against him with quiet sobs. Sango whimpered and stirred slowly.

"Ugh what the hell happ..." she yelped and scrambled back from her rescuer, reaching for Hiraikotsu through she was too weak to rise.

The hanyou rushed to her side and knelt by the slayer, "Take this, quick," he added when she gave him a suspicious look.

Sesshomaru noted that the stench of poison began to fade almost immediately. Hanyou or not this 'Jinenji' knew his herbs.

Inuyasha sniffed the woman, and looked up at him with those big golden eyes.

"It's okay Sango," Kagome said kneeling by her, happy tears streamed down her face.

Miroku dove for her and Sango groaned, nauseous from the remnants of poison, as he hugged and kissed her.

Sesshomaru sheathed Tensaiga and turned away. He'd only made it a few steps when he heard Inuyasha's voice. "Hey, Sesshomaru?"

He briefly closed his eyes, contemplating the benefits of banging his head against the nearest tree. This night could not end quickly enough. "Yes, Inuyasha?"

The hanyou stepped up to his side. "Uhh look, thank you. This might not seem like a big deal to you, her being human and all, but...well, it's a big deal for us."

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow. "Does this babble have a point?"

Inuyasha frowned at him, showing a flash of bared fang before the younger male took a deep breath. "Ok, ok. I wanted to thank you. And find out what this is gonna cost us."

He was confused, but didn't show it in his expression. "Cost you?"

Inuyasha folded his arms. "Yeah. I'm not stupid; I know you wouldn't have helped us without something in it for you."

Sesshomaru was caught off-guard by the assumption that he wouldn't have helped without personal gain. Well, it'd been true enough in the past.

"I want nothing from you or your friends."

"Come on there must be a way we can repay you," Inuyasha was getting angry now, he didn't want to owe the bastard.

Sesshomaru began walking away completely _done_ with humans and demons that thought they were human when he saw Rin and a thought occurred to him, "I wish to borrow the priestess."

Inuyasha's jaw dropped. "Huh?"

Sesshomaru glanced back at him. "I do believe you heard me."

He racked his brain for any reason the youkai could _possibly_ need Kagome, but came up empty. "Uhh ok, but why?"

"She's a female."

Inuyasha was just more baffled, but he owed the demon. He shrugged and called to his packmate. "Hey Kagome, c'mere for a minute."

The priestess came up, smiling and wiping away the last of her happy tears. "Thank you for helping us, Sesshomaru. What did you need, Inuyasha?"

Sesshomaru secretly enjoyed the hanyou's obvious discomfort. The pup scratched his head and tried to explain. "Well, umm you see, I was asking Sesshomaru how we could repay him. And, uhh well, he asked to borrow you? So, yeah..."

Kagome stared at Inuyasha for a full 10 seconds, then looked up at Sesshomaru, "What on earth could you need _me_ for?"

He walked away, surprised when she didn't follow, "Follow."

Kagome glared at Inuyasha, nervous about being around not only a full adult demon but one she had no control over. If Inuyasha thought for a moment that Sesshomaru would have any nefarious interest in a human woman he would have balked too but instead he simply gestured her along.

Kagome huffed, "You think I'm just a commodity, you..."

"You're my friend, but he isn't going to harm you, so just go, ok?"

She huffed again and followed Sesshomaru to a small clearing. Jaken, Rin and Ah-Un were on the far side, eating dinner by the moonlight. He stopped and she did as well almost walking into him. It was strange not rushing everywhere.

Sesshomaru gesture to his followers, "You are familiar with Rin?"

"Yeah of course but..."

"You are a human female, naturally...caring?" he cut in searching for the right word.

The priestess blinked at him. "Yeah? I think I'm pretty caring. What about it?"

Sesshomaru glanced to Rin, trying to think of the correct way to word what he wanted Kagome to help with.

"Would you...that is to say I believe that Rin needs a bitch and hers is dead."

Kagome's shock at Sesshomaru's hesitation was instantly trumped by outrage, "How dare you?! You ask a favor and insult me in the same breath? Sit boy!"

Sesshomaru just stared at her, smelling Jaken and Rin's anxiety at the noise. His eyes widened as he realized his mistake.

"I think you would say...mother. A female influence," he explained.

Kagome paused with her mouth open. _Oh, he meant bitch like female dog._

Slowly, she closed her mouth and stared at the demon. "She...needs a female influence?"

Sesshomaru nodded once. "And she refuses to leave my side, so sending her with your group or leaving her in a village is out of the question."

Kagome nodded, understanding now. "How long will you need me to be around to 'influence' her? Do you think...would you consider our groups traveling together? You and Inuyasha don't have to interact. It'd just be a bit easier to agree to this if my family were close by."

Sesshomaru tensed. "Your..._family_?"

Kagome nodded, blithely unaware of the youkai's tension. "Yeah. I know it's not a traditional family, but we're all kinda like...siblings, you know?  
For the first time, she noticed how still and quiet Sesshomaru had become. _Gods, I'm an idiot._

"That would be acceptable." His voice was, if possible, colder than normal. He could always attend to other things the majority of the time; he need not actually travel with them himself so long as he returned to Rin regularly as usual.

"However I would require some of your time each night, I will take you to a location where we won't be disturbed." A location where Inuyasha wouldn't be able to overhear.

Kagome wondered if she should say something, the tension hadn't left him and it was setting her on edge, she was still dithering when the demon said, "I'll inform Rin and Jaken, I suggest you do the same."

"I'm…I'm sorry I wasn't thinking and I just..."

He doubted humans ever thought, but let it pass for the sake of ending the interaction quicker, "Sorry for what?"

"It never occurred to me that...I mean obviously...I wasn't trying to hurt you I just..."

"No human could hurt me," a slight exaggeration one should never underestimate an enemy but true enough in this case. At least for now, until he had nothing else to think about, she needn't know that though.

Kagome nodded, deciding that trying to stay on that subject would only result in more tension. "Ok so you're gonna inform Jaken and Rin - I'll go tell Inuyasha and the others. I'm thinking we just stay in our camps tonight and set off in the morning?"

Sesshomaru nodded once, and the priestess took off. It was only about a three-minute walk between camps; surely she couldn't get into trouble that quickly.

A few minutes later, he heard the satisfying sound of Inuyasha overreacting. "WHAT?! WHAT'D YOU SAY?!"

Ha. If anything were going to amuse him in this century, it would likely be his brother losing all sense. Of course that would mean he'd had any to begin with.

X

"Inuyasha it's just to help Rin."

"You can't SERIOUSLY expect me to deal with that bastard all day. He'll probably try to kill me in my sleep...okay well no but he WILL try to kill me," Inuyasha ranted.

"Well just don't give him a reason to," Kagome said sweetly.

"He doesn't need a reason and...fuck the new moon's in less than a week!"

Kagome paled, "Well I doubt he'll need me for that long."

"You'd better hope not," Inuyasha groused.

X

Later that night Kagome was having trouble sleeping, thinking about the day's events. She got up and sat down next to Inuyasha.

"Hey can I ask you something without you flipping out?"

Inuyasha grunted assent

"I said something that upset Sesshomaru but I'm not really sure why."

"You're human, it was probably just that you were breathing."

"I said you guys were my family," Inuyasha's eyes softened.

"He got real tense but when I tried to apologize he brushed me off. If I'm going to be spending time with him I don't...want to step wrong. I didn't mean to hurt him," she finished repeating her earlier words and hoping for a more helpful response.

Inuyasha hesitated, inexplicably uncomfortable with the thought of Sesshomaru being hurt. He shook his head. "I doubt you actually hurt him, Kagome. Nothing hurts him. But if you're that worried, just don't mention it again."

He thought back to their fight over Tetsusaiga, Sesshomaru calmly facing him while blood dripped from his missing leg. Granted some of it might have been being transformed and he had fled in the end when Inuyasha had unlocked Tetsusaiga's power but still Inuyasha wasn't sure he could have stood there ready to keep going.

The constant hanyou insults would hurt less if he didn't see the truth in them when he compared himself to his brother. It seemed that no matter how powerful he got he would still never be able to match the full demon. Even with all the times he'd beaten him there were always extenuating circumstances. And no matter what, he always had the hanyou softness - if anything that had gotten worse.

Inuyasha stared into the fire as Kagome went and laid back down. He found his thoughts consumed by the youkai and what Kagome had said. _Maybe the thought of family makes him tense? He did lose Father, I've never heard mention of his mother, and his only sibling is a 'filthy disgrace'. But I don't see him actually being _hurt_ over it._

As the night advanced, he checked his pack to make sure everyone was still breathing, especially Sango. It was a habit he'd developed from almost losing all of them at one point or another. Kagome was right.  
They were family.

After assuring himself his nakama were fine, he circled the camp a few times, restless for a reason he couldn't pinpoint.

Maybe he could go check on the new extension of his pack?  
Nah that was stupid.  
But Sesshomaru was probably asleep and wouldn't know.  
Still a stupid idea.  
Well, he wasn't known for having the brightest ideas.

Staying downwind of the other camp, he stalked it, using all the stealth skills he'd learned growing up alone.

Inuyasha slipped up until he was just within the tree line of the clearing and observed Rin and Jaken sleeping on Ah-Un, Rin restlessly so. Sesshomaru was sitting against a tree some twenty feet or so away, easy reach for a demon of his caliber.

Inuyasha watched, unsure of exactly why he'd gone there or what he planned to do. Every once in a while Sesshomaru would look down at his sleeping pack before returning his gaze to the moon.

X

Sesshomaru gazed at the sky, lost in thought and uncharacteristically anxious. He hoped the human could give him the information he sought, he'd planned to talked to her when he returned from the days travels but perhaps first light would be better. He had thought Rin could adapt, she was shockingly capable for a small human but it was becoming apparent that she needed things he couldn't provide.

For that matter he didn't even know _what_ she needed. He had no idea what a human bi...mother was supposed to do and demon mothers clearly weren't the same if Inuyasha's affection for his human one was anything to go by.

Family...maybe that was what Rin needed. He'd long since lost any interest in it, it brought only pain and the unfading kind at that. He caught scent of Inuyasha and quickly turned his thoughts to more martial topics. If the hanyou chose to approach he needed to be in a frame of mind to fight not...whatever he'd been doing. Besides he didn't want Inuyasha to catch any...untoward scents.

X

Inuyasha hesitated at the anxiety and almost wistful scents he was picking up - they were alarming in their unfamiliarity when it came to the scent of the youkai.

Then they faded, Sesshomaru's scent becoming a solid force once again.

Crap, he had the strangest feeling he'd interrupted something.

But it was too late to back off; those golden eyes were focused on his hiding spot. Damn demon senses. Taking a deep breath, he walked slowly into the clearing, hands loose at his side.

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, and the demon shifted to get up. Inuyasha held out his hands. "Calm down. I'm not here to fight, ok? I just came to confirm something."

Those golden eyes watched him suspiciously. "What would that be?"

Inuyasha sighed. "Are our groups really gonna be traveling together?"

The older canine gave a curt nod, and he sighed again. "Ok. Well, do you think maybe, for the sake of the younger ones, we could have like a truce or something? I know you hate me, but the kids are exposed to enough fighting without _us _being at each other's throats."

Sesshomaru didn't answer for several moments, but Inuyasha managed a rare bout of patience. This was important, after all.

Finally, his brother gave another curt nod. "I do not plan on being around excessively, but when I am, we will have a 'truce'."

Inuyasha nodded and tried not to sigh in relief.

"Was there anything else?"

Inuyasha shook his head. "Nah, I'm good. So...see ya in the morning."

He left as quickly as possible without looking like he was running away.


	2. Tension

Oh we do not own squat. Rumiko Takahashi owns Inuyasha.

CH. 2: Tension

Warnings: language, drinking.

* * *

Kagome was on Inuyasha's back, Miroku and Sango rode Kirara while Rin had let an excited and curious Shippo join her and Jaken on Ah-Un.  
The kids seemed to have hit it off and Kagome pitied her for being stuck with the toad and her distant 'lord' all the time. When they stopped for lunch she watched Rin try to put flowers in Shippo's hair, he started yelling and chased the girl around as she laughed gleefully. Kagome frowned at the bittersweet moment.

She was starting to think Sesshomaru had a point - Rin could definitely use some nurturing in her life. She realized she knew nothing of the girl's life before she met the youkai.

But something told her not to ask.

So she and Sango just watched the kids play, while Inuyasha and Miroku took care of a small-fry demon in the next village.

"It seems unlikely that we'll be disturbed." Kagome almost jumped out of her skin and turned to find the youkai behind her.

"Sango! Why didn't you..."

Sango shrugged, "I thought you noticed." She rose and walked a little ways off, remaining close enough to keep an eye on both the kids and Kagome without being close enough to 'disturb'.

Sesshomaru glared at Sango before turning his attention to Kagome, "So what does she need?"

Kagome swallowed; Sesshomaru was intimidating at the best of times, and now she had to instruct him, "She needs more nurturing. We can help some, but what's going to help her the most is the most important people in her life being more nurturing towards her. Things that seem little to you may actually be a big deal for her."

She saw a muscle twitch in the demon's jaw. "Example?"

Kagome nodded and pointed at the campfire. "Ok, she cooked her own food. Kids her age don't usually have those skills yet. So Sango and I both told her that we were proud of her. And Sesshomaru, she lit up like the sun was inside her!"

The tall youkai inclined his head thoughtfully. "So...praise? When she accomplishes something?"

Kagome nodded. "Exactly! But that's just one way. Kids are quite playful. I'm sure it seems...I dunno...trivial and pointless to you, but it's actually a really important part of development. She's been playing with Shippo during every spare moment, and she's been so happy about it."

Sesshomaru nodded slowly. "I have noticed her playfulness. I was unaware that it was a critical part of her growing up. I am not...well-suited for playing."

Kagome nodded emphatically, "Definitely."

Sesshomaru thought about her words, tried to decide on a course of action and realized he was missing a key piece of information, "You said 'praise'. What exactly am I supposed to praise her for other than cooking? She doesn't train in any martial forms."

"Uh...well...you know, when she learns a new skill or makes something or...I don't know just do what your parents did." Kagome winced as soon as the exasperated words came out of her mouth.

"That hasn't been working. That's why you are here." Sesshomaru replied calmly.

Kagome nodded nervously. "Right. Well, little things can get praise. Umm, what's some stuff she does on her own?"

Sesshomaru thought for a bit. "She is actually somewhat skilled at catching fish bare-handed."

Kagome almost squealed. "Perfect! And you praised her for _that,_ right?"

The youkai glanced away. "I...said nothing."

"What's wrong with you?!"

"In demon families only martial skill is praised."

Kagome thought about Koga - even he would occasionally have a kind word for the two meat heads following him, while Shippo had never seemed to have any sort of issues or share Rin's shock at a compliment. "Demon families are like that or just yours?"

"I would assume all of them...I never had a reason to care one way another."

Kagome was still trying to form a response but he was already gone, Inuyasha leaped down beside her a minute later smiling. He was stained with blood but none of it his own. Miroku had gone to check on Sango as he did obsessively of late.

"Don't let him get to you," Inuyasha said, seeing her expression, scenting his brother and drawing the obvious conclusion.

Kagome just shook her head. "It's fine, we've just got a long way to go. Apparently, he was raised thinking only fighting skills should be praised."

Inuyasha thought of his own mother and how she had lauded every attempt he made. "That's kinda sad, " he murmured, then realized what he'd said. Kagome was looking at him oddly but said nothing.

"Ehh, c'mon. The villagers gave us rice and dried meat for killing that demon. I think there's even some sake."

Kagome ate sullenly with the others for a while, thinking, then suddenly she looked at Inuyasha, "What _do_ you know about his parents?"

Inuyasha choked on some sake, "You don't actually feel bad for him do you?"

"So do you. I can see it in your eyes," Kagome huffed.

Inuyasha shook his head, "Girls... I might hate him but not that much."

"What?" Kagome asked seriously contemplating a 'sitting'.

"I don't think there'd be anything worse in his eyes than being pitied human and he considers me less than that."

Inuyasha sighed at the look on Kagome's face - she obviously didn't understand. He _couldn't_ feel bad for Sesshomaru, much less show it. The demon's pride probably wouldn't survive the blow of a 'half-breed's sympathy.

But Kagome was still waiting for an answer to her original question. He shrugged. "I know next to nothing about Father, and I know even less about Sesshomaru's mother. I mean, I assume she is or was a real demon, but that's it."

A few trees away, behind the treeline, Sesshomaru stood frozen. He'd intended to come fetch the priestess to ask her if teaching Rin to fight would fulfill the 'play' and 'praise' tasks.

They were discussing him, the insolent - but he heard Inuyasha's voice again. "I'd be family to him if he accepted me, but that's never gonna happen."

Sesshomaru turned and silently made his way back to his own camp.

Kagome put an arm around Inuyasha's shoulder, "Well then that's his fault right?"

Inuyasha nodded but still looked dejected.

He watched as Kagome finally went and laid down among the group. With a sigh he raised his eyes to the waning moon. Damn, the new moon was coming in only a couple of days.

Soon, his thoughts were occupied with how to avoid letting Sesshomaru know about his human night.

XxXx  
Sesshomaru leaned back against a tree near his followers and cursed Inuyasha to the nine hells. Nearly a hundred years he'd fought to erase the stain his father and the hanyou had placed on their family. After his father had died for the spawn Sesshomaru had done everything in his power to prove he was a true demon.

In younger more reckless days he'd taken his pleasure in shoving every slur down the throats of anyone who dared to think he was less than what he was. Now not only did his father favor Inuyasha over him but even the hanyou himself looked down on him? If they thought him so worthless than so be it, he'd prove them wrong, as he had so many before them.

As the sun set over the trees Sesshomaru returned to that day's encampment and settled down just behind the tree line. Inuyasha would be human tonight and it would be best for the priestess and therefore Rin, if he was close at hand. That and he'd never balked at a chance to show the hanyou up even if the attempts rarely ended well.

There was also the fact that Inuyasha didn't know that he was aware of the new moon's effect on the hanyou. And watching his brother panic over his presence would be a diversion, if nothing else.

XxXx

Inuyasha cursed under his breath. Sesshomaru had been spending most of the last few days out doing...whatever it was he did when he went off by himself. So he hadn't been around much, and Inuyasha had been hoping the youkai would continue his absence through the night of the new moon.

No such luck.

His sense of smell was weakening, but he could tell his brother had parked his royal, stuck-up ass just outside the camp. Fuck it all.

Speaking of camp, it had grown. They had started out with separate areas, but each time camp was made for the night, they had seemed to get closer and closer until tonight. Tonight, the packs had just set up one big camp. Which meant Sesshomaru would be near all night to watch over his ward and vassal. Double fuck it all.

Inuyasha paced relentlessly, looking towards the setting sun every few seconds. Finally, he snatched up a bottle of the sake, and slipped away on the opposite side of the camp from his brother.

Sesshomaru would have smirked had it been in his habit to do so. Of all the pathetic _human_ things to do Inuyasha was getting drunk? And yet he had Tetsusaiga. Even though he no longer wished for the sword, the fact that their father had considered him unfit for it still...hurt was the only word it. Maybe the old man was right after all, a real demon wouldn't care.

And if he'd defeated Inuyasha several times, only one recently had been a true fight to the death and the hanyou had been out of his mind with demon blood. The fact that Sesshomaru didn't turn human on occasion was more bitter than helpful, if the only thing he could stake his dominance on was the one thing a hanyou had no control over then he truly didn't deserve Tetsusaiga. He sniffed for enemies but the only unusual thing he smelled was the vile scent of drunk, human Inuyasha.

He closed his eyes a moment and rose walking the dark tree line for a distraction. If he stayed in one spot he'd have to deal with the realization that he was actually looking forward to an attack. He had no intention of dwelling on the fact that he had something to prove to that filth. If this was 'family' they could keep it. He'd take the freedom, peace and solitude of the woods any day.

XxXx

"Maybe you should slow down a bit," Kagome said as Inuyasha spilled sake refilling his glass. He ignored her and drained half of it.

"Y'know what?" he asked as though struck by an epiphany, "I'm gon'talk Sesmoru."

Kagome put a hand on his shoulder, "You're human remember?"

"Yeah an' h's here an' kin prob'ly smellit so what I got ta loosh?"

Inuyasha slipped into the trees, his intoxication telling him he was one stealthy sonofabitch. He hummed under his breath as he stayed in the shadows, eyes peeled for the youkai he sought.

Finally, after what seemed like _forever_, he saw a flash of swirling silver between the trees. The thought occurred to him that Sesshomaru might want to go ahead and just kill him like this. Huh. Maybe he was ok with that.

"Hey, Shessh'maru?" he called softly. The older male turned to look at him, cool contempt in those lustrous golden eyes. But Sesshomaru didn't speak, instead looking back up at where the moon should've been.

Inuyasha sighed. "So yeah. Spent all these years worried 'bout you fin'in out my human nigh', jus' for you to fin' out now."

Silence reigned between them, then a quiet reply reached him. "Fool. I already knew your human night. I always have."

"Ya...wha'?" Inuyasha asked not processing the words.

Sesshomaru said nothing and Inuyasha could feel the contempt rolling off him.

He didn't repeat himself in general and if the stupid Hanyou was too drunk to follow a simple conversation then that was his fault.

"Ya knew?" the younger male said, finally catching up. "Then why'ja neva' attack?"

His eyes flashed with rage, this insolent whelp thought him such a coward as to attack when he was defenseless? he refrained from saying as much only because he doubted Inuyasha would comprehend it and he had zero desire to deal with him in his disgraceful human form.

"I hardly need the advantage."

The world spun and Inuyasha put a hand on the tree as his stomach flipped a bit, he closed his eyes for a moment until the moving sensation stopped. Somewhere in the back of his mind a thought niggled that he'd done something wrong but it didn't seem important.

"So ya shay, but'cha hate me s'why nah gerrid o'me?"

_Because if you were human it would prove nothing_, he thought bitterly but said nothing. Why did every response that came to mind sound ridiculously insecure? Infernal hanyou.

"I had more important things to concern myself with."

Inuyasha swayed a little, damn it was hard to think. He sat down on the ground and looked up at the older demon.

He was kinda blurry, but still formidable. Why did Sesshomaru have to hate him? "There's nothin' I c'n do to make ya eva 'cept me, 's there? You'll jus' hate me f'eva."

He sighed, hating the emotions he dealt with on a new moon. The emotions and the liquor loosened his tongue with unfiltered honesty. "I don' wanna figh' you all the time. I wish we could...y'know, actually be like fam'ly."

Sesshomaru's eyes widened as he sorted out the garbled words. The hanyou, the taint on his name that he'd done everything he could to distance himself from unwanted...closeness. He wished Inuyasha had never existed but that wasn't the case.

He met the hanyou's eyes and spoke slowly hoping it would get through his drink addled mind, "I have to defeat you."

A wave of nausea swept Inuyasha and he bowed his head a moment until it passed, "Why? Ah fackin' gave ya the sword, ya didn' wannit."

Sesshomaru realized he'd placed himself in an awkward position, he should have just walked away. Well the hanyou probably wouldn't remember much of the conversation anyway, "A true demon would not suffer any human taint in their tribe. Other demons would take it for weakness."

Inuyasha blinked. "Human taint? Then...then wha' the _fuck_ is the deal with Rin? I know she's no' reladed, but you treat her like she is. No' sayin' you shouldn' treat her well, but you treat her better than me. I..I don' un'erstan'. At leas' I have _some _demon in me. Don' tha' count for _som'thin'_?"

Sesshomaru was taken aback though his expression didn't change.

"You're jealous?" he asked, a hint of disgust entering his tone.

Inuyasha sighed loudly, allowing his own disgust at the situation, his humanity, and the world in general to shine through. The irritation over the circumstances was doing a marvelous job of sobering him up.

"Of _course_ I'm jealous, you fuckin' jackass! Look, your overwhelming hate for me aside, you're my only real family. You protect and provide for a human you've known, what? All of a year? Hate me or not, I'm your fuckin' little brother and you ain't ever done shit for me. I may not have known him, but I can't imagine Father would be thrilled about that. But, y'know, what-the-fuck-ever. You do whatever the fuck you need to. You decide you wanna finally kill me, I'll be waiting."

He got up and started to walk away. He was _done_.

"I'm sure he wouldn't have been, given that he willingly died for you and gave you his inheritance. I find that I don't much care what he wanted," Sesshomaru snarled as Inuyasha tripped over something and fell flat on his face. "The fact that you expect anyone to do anything for you just highlights your inferiority."

He realized that the hanyou was making small whimpering sounds on the ground, at first he chalked it up to the over-emotional human body and was about to leave but then Inuyasha curled up on his side and he realized something was actually wrong.

He reached down and picked the hanyou up, he whimpered in discomfort and Sesshomaru allowed his lips to quirk slightly. Being picked up with one arm was probably uncomfortable but then having an arm cut off wasn't exactly enjoyable. It meant nothing next to Tetsusaiga though.

He set Inuyasha down against a tree

The smell of blood reached his nose and it twitched at the scent. He looked down to see blood darkening Inuyasha's fire-rat clothing at his stomach.

The transformed hanyou had fallen on a broken branch.

Well, wasn't this perfect?

XxXx

Inuyasha blinked through the tearing pain in his abdomen, seeing Sesshomaru crouched in front of him with his golden eyes fixed on the wound.

The last words the youkai had spoken rang through his mind, and he snarled as he covered the wound with both hands. "I ain't never _expected_ shit! Especially not from you! There's a difference between wanting or needing something and just expecting it to be handed over."

Sesshomaru ignored him and tried to pick the wounded hanyou up. Inuyasha shoved his hands away so Sesshomaru knocked him out with a punch, reminding himself at the last moment to check the power because he was human tonight. He then picked up the much less troublesome hanyou and walked back to find the priestess. Huh if he was always unconscious perhaps they _could_ get along.

XxXx

"Ah have you seen..." Kagome called out when she saw Sesshomaru. She broke off when she noticed Inuyasha slung over his shoulder, "What did you do?"

"Knocked him out."

Kagome sighed given what she'd seen of Inuyasha's state she wasn't surprised.

"He fell, impaled himself on piece of wood," Sesshomaru explained, kneeling and placing Inuyasha on the ground as gently as possible with one arm.

Kagome kneeled on the other side of her unconscious friend. She opened the red robe and white undershirt, baring Inuyasha to the hips, examined the wound and smiled. "This'll be fine. It's not too deep, and I don't think there's any debris in it. He's had much worse on his human nights."

She glanced up as Sesshomaru rose and turned away.

It occurred to her that the youkai could've left sooner, but had waited to hear her verdict. Hmmm...

XxXx

A hour or so before dawn Inuyasha stirred and groaned.

"Oh you're awake!" Kagome cried happily.

"Ugh," he winced and touched his bandaged stomach. "What happened?" Kagome recounted what Sesshomaru had told her.

So Sesshomaru had brought him here to get treated, and according to Kagome, had been rather gentle with his unconscious form? Inuyasha thumped his head against the ground. "Fuck! Do I fuckin' owe him now? What the actual fuck?"

This was so messed up. Now he had to thank that bastard for not letting him die. So messed up.

He sat up, brushing dirt off himself. Might as well get this over with. He climbed to his feet, determined to find his brother, thank him in as few words as possible, then stay the Hell away from him.

He waited until the sun appeared and returned him to a hanyou, then scented along to find the demon in question. His jaw dropped to see him carefully adjusting the position of Rin's hand and front foot as she stood with a bokken in her hands, trying to look fierce as kids do. What the actual fuck.

Sesshomaru stepped back and she ran through the first two moves of a simple form before the demon stopped her to correct an apparent mistake, Inuyasha hadn't seen one, and she began again.

Sesshomaru scented his brother, but ignored his presence for a few moments as he corrected Rin's stance. Remembering what Kagome had suggested, he quietly praised her effort before sending her over to Ah-Un.

He sensed Inuyasha just watching, and turned enough to see the hanyou standing at the treeline. He looked troubled.

Sesshomaru remembered that Inuyasha was jealous over his attention to Rin, and sighed to himself. While jealousy was a disgustingly weak emotion, he had once been guilty of it, and he could see why the younger male felt that way.

Finally, Inuyasha approached him. Sesshomaru spoke as the hanyou opened his mouth.

"She cannot defend herself in the ways you can," he hadn't meant to sound so defensive.

Inuyasha closed and opened his mouth a couple of times before shaking his head. "At least she's learning from someone who knows how to fight - I had to learn on my own. But that's not what I came here for. I came...tothankyou."

"And you..." he broke off, _praise_ what a ridiculous habit to develop even if it was helping Rin, "I already had to touch you, spare me having to speak to you."

Inuyasha growled low, but instead of snapping, addressed his curiosity, he'd _never_ heard the demon trail off like that. On the occasion that he actually spoke to Inuyasha it was never moderated, usually to devastating effect.

"What were you about to say?"

He hesitated and glanced to the side, "That you did well for having no instructor."

Inuyasha knew he was gaping like a fish, but couldn't stop. What the-? "Umm thanks. That...means a lot."

Deciding to change the subject before the youkai took back his once-in-a-lifetime compliment, Inuyasha cleared his throat. Sesshomaru had basically said he didn't wanna talk, but it crossed his mind that maybe he could help with Rin's training.

Sesshomaru glared death at the hanyou even though he was more angry at himself for the slip. Inuyasha however looked lost in thought, surprising as that may seem.

"Hey uh you know maybe I could show her some stuff. Our styles _are_ quite different," Inuyasha added a little more sheepishly than he intended. He wanted to kick himself, gods how obvious could he be short of wagging a tail and going 'I have something to offer right?'.

"No." Sesshomaru replied. "Though perhaps you could speak to the slayer? I need to know more about her limitations and suspect that Kagome would not be truthful. She seems quite horrified." he gestured to Rin. His jaw tightened as he saw what she was doing and forgetting Inuyasha he went correct her.

Inuyasha flinched at the 'no'. "Why not me? I'm not good enough to help?" He heard the near-whine in his words, and frowned fiercely as a soft growl rumbled in his chest. But fuck it all, Sesshomaru _had _saved one of his pack.

"Fine, I'll go get her. And her name is Sango, not 'slayer'."

Sesshomaru was either completely engrossed with Rin or affecting so, either way he didn't reply and Inuyasha went to talk to Sango muttering.

"What's wrong?" Sango asked.

"Nothing, Sesshomaru wanted to talk to you."

"About what and that explains it."

"Human physical ability and what the hell is that supposed to mean."

"Well no one else can make you flounce like that."

Inuyasha spluttered with indignation, "Demons don't 'flounce'!"

"Apparently half-demons do," Sango replied playfully. Inuyasha turned away with a huff. Maybe Kagome would be more understanding.

He flounced off, and Sango shook her head fondly as she set off. She came upon the youkai talking to Rin, waited until he appeared to be done, then bowed her head politely.

"Sesshomaru? Inuyasha said you wished to see me?"

"Yes I need to know what kind of physical performance I can expect from a human female. There is also...the matter of humans not having the speed to dodge or block efficiently. You're still alive so perhaps you have a technique?" he explained.

Meanwhile Inuyasha greeted Kagome with, "That arrogant bastard doesn't even think I'm good enough to teach a fucking eight year old!"

Kagome sighed.

Really, her friend was too easily upset. "Maybe it's not that you're not good enough; maybe there's another reason? Did you ask if that was why?"

Inuyasha huffed and folded his arms, glaring. "As a matter of fact, I did. He didn't answer."

Kagome raised her eyebrows. "Then ask again."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. Women.

XxXx

Sango nodded. "I've been training since I was younger than Rin. From the time I could walk, actually. It took years to get to this level. I could show her some of the basics I knew at that age?"

Sesshomaru eyed her carefully and nodded, "Focus on defense." he stepped away to watch. After all he would have to make sure she kept up with the regimen and correctly after the slayer left.

Sango walked back into camp after a solid two hours of work and a discussion about the amount of rest a kid Rin's age needed with a rather disbelieving demon. Sesshomaru might be frustrating to deal with and have the ability to make you feel two inches tall at a glance, but Rin had been a dream student. She'd listened to every instruction, tried very hard to please and had a surprising amount of strength and stamina for her age.

"Inuyasha, is it normal for demons to train for upwards of six hours a day as children?"

Inuyasha blinked. "Uhh you do realize I never officially trained, right? I don't know how demons do it. But I guess...it makes sense. High-class demons do seem to be much more efficient than low vermin types. So maybe..." He trailed off as a thought occurred to him.

If Sesshomaru had trained like that, it would explain how he was usually so composed and tactical, while he himself tended to just charge in and bludgeon the enemy with Tetsusaiga until he won.

Huh...what if that was why Sesshomaru had said no to his help? After all, he admittedly got wounded quite a bit, while the youkai tended to be a bit safer in his own battles. If that was the case, then Sesshomaru would likely want his ward to be safer, and so Inuyasha's aggressive style would not be welcomed.

Inuyasha sighed to himself. Was there anything he knew that he _could_ offer that Sesshomaru would accept?

"No, wow really?" Sango asked impressed, Inuyasha wasn't listening though and darted off. Sango just shook her head.

Inuyasha darted across the field and ran up to his brother, for a moment his old hatred for the mistreatment gripped him and he almost drew his sword before remembering that things were different now. Besides he was doing this for Rin and she obviously wasn't aware of what an absolute dick her 'lord' could be.

"Hey you're really worried about Rin getting hurt right?" he asked rhetorically and winced when that glare fell on him. He probably could have worded that better, maybe Sesshomaru actually had a point about his style much as that thought annoyed him.

"Here," he said shucking out of his fire-rat robe and holding it out. Sesshomaru's eyes widened.

Inuyasha had rarely seen his brother in shock, and he watched a bit nervously as the youkai stared at the red cloth for several heartbeats. Finally, Sesshomaru stepped closer and slowly took the garment.

"You are willing to part with this for Rin's sake?"

Inuyasha nodded, ears flicking anxiously. "Yeah, no problem. Besides, I heard there might be another fire-rat in the Eastern mountains. So, y'know, we might be able to get her one of her own, made just for her, someday. Until then, she can keep that. Is that ok?"

The older male nodded and met his eyes. "You...have my gratitude."

Inuyasha nodded, absurdly pleased by the approval. "Sure thing. Umm I dunno if you know this, but besides being fire-proof, it's also poison-proof and bullet-proof. Anyways, I gotta go hunt. Ummm, see you."

Sesshomaru nodded and Inuyasha left feeling extremely pleased and a little embarrassed for how happy he was. He would need to get another robe soon so Kagome could have it but he knew that she would rather see the little girl protected than herself.

He thought back on what Sesshomaru had said, from anyone else it would have been a less than luke-warm reception but adjusted for the youkai's general demeanor he'd sounded almost touched.

XxXx

Sesshomaru stared at the robe in his hand another moment then turned and called Rin to him. She trotted up happily, her bokken at her side as he required.

He handed her the robe, "Inuyasha gifted this to you," her eyes widened in joy and she jumped on the cloth.

"Rin." she froze in the middle of pulling it on and looked up at him from inside the robe. He explained the properties of the robe, she looked stunned. He braced himself for the next part, "You should thank him." She nodded emphatically.

"I will, my lord! Should I go now?"

He nodded, watching as the tore off after the hanyou. Inuyasha had given something incredibly important to his ward, and he wasn't sure how he felt about it.

He didn't realize that it hadn't even crossed his mind to refuse.

He followed Rin at a distance; he hadn't seen his brother and Rin interact much before, and was curious how they received each other.

XxXx

Inuyasha heard the fast 'pitter-patter' of tiny feet behind him, and turned. Rin was running towards him, beaming. The fire-rat robe was draped around her like a full kimono, the hem trailing dangerously close to her feet.

With a smile, he knelt down as she skidded to a stop. "Thank you for the gift!"

He nodded. "You're welcome. I hope it comes in handy."

Rin's smile dimmed a bit, "Are you going to be ok without it?"

Inuyasha chuckled and patted her head. "I'll be fine. Contrary to what Sesshomaru might think, i'm pretty strong. And I'm planning to get more fire-rat hair sometime."

That grin returned full-force. "Thanks again, Uncle Inuyasha."

He froze, eyes widening. "You...you don't have to call me that. I don't think Sesshomaru would like it."

Rin winked. "He doesn't have to know." Then she held her arms out.

Inuyasha leaned forward and embraced her, wearing a soft smile. As he was hugging her, the breeze shifted, bring him the scent of his brother. His eyes slid open to see Sesshomaru standing there.

Sesshomaru would have been smirking if he were so inclined. He didn't have a lot of pleasures in life outside of his quest for power -which had been less than pleasurable of late-and the look on Inuyasha's face was worth him thinking that he hadn't intentionally revealed himself.

"What was that?" he asked.

Inuyasha quickly released Rin and stood up. "Nothin', she was thanking me for the robe."

Trying to avoid that golden gaze, he noticed that the hem still trailed around Rin's feet. He knelt back down and adjusted the garment, securing the edge of the fabric a few inches above her ankles. "There, that way you won't trip."

He rose and glanced towards camp. "I still need to go hunting. We're almost out of food."

He looked down when he felt a tug on his leg. Rin was gazing up at him. "Can I come?"

"Uh..." without thinking he glanced up at the youkai.

Sesshomaru turned and walked away. Inuyasha supposed that meant 'your choice'.

"Uh sure." Rin clung to him as he began his hunt. He got a couple of birds while Rin yelped in thrill as he leaped through the air, and was just stalking a small deer like animal when Rin gasped.

"Those aren't for eating!"

"What why?"

"They're too cute."

Inuyasha frowned slightly as the critter, startled by their voices, took off. He sat down, beckoning Rin to join him. "Rin, animals are for eating. I've got a whole group to feed, you know. A couple of birds won't be enough. Someone will go hungry if I don't get more food. Understand?"

The girl nodded. "I see. But it was really cute."

Unable to help himself, he smiled. "It was. Bet it would've been delicious."  
Rin giggled and Inuyasha sniffed the air. "Ok I can smell boar. You don't think they're cute, do you?"

His companion made a face and shook her head. He nodded. "Ok, I'm gonna need you to be quiet so we don't scare it off."

He began stalking the small boar, easily pouncing on and killing it. Rin seemed delighted with his prowess, then asked, "Will anyone be hungry now?"

Inuyasha tilted his head. "I think this should be enough. Why?"

She grinned at him. "I can help!" Curious, he followed her as she moved among the trees, gathering mushrooms.

Rin was quite adept at the task and soon had a nice bundle. Kagome would be able to make a great stew out of that. Suddenly a roar rent the air and a pack of demons descended on them. Inuyasha lashed out with his claws, forcing them back long enough to draw Tetsusaiga. A claw sliced his shoulder and he roared cutting the demon in half.

Two more took its place and he heard Rin shriek, "Lord Sesshomaru!"

Inuyasha snarled as he lashed out over and over, but he and Tetsusaiga were heavily outnumbered. Many of the lowly vermin were circling in an attempt to reach Rin, as a human child, especially a girl, was considered to be a delicacy.

He couldn't use Wind Scar because the energy that surrounded that attack would be too much for a human child to bear.

Wielding his Fang with one hand, he used the other to send Blades of Blood over Rin's head. The girl had flung herself to the ground, and Inuyasha spun as he swiped at the attackers. "Iron Reaver Soul Stealer!"

But there were just too many.

He threw himself over Rin, covering her small body with his own.

The acrid scent of Sesshomaru's poison whip caught Inuyasha's nose as he lost consciousness.

Sesshomaru rebounded off a tree and lashed out again drawing Tokijin as he landed, and he sliced through the demons around Rin. They retreated and he turned to find Inuyasha covered in blood, obvious without his red robe. He moved the hanyou aside only to find that he was clinging tight to Rin. He could smell no blood on her-that robe really was incredible- but she was unconscious. He carried Inuyasha still with his death grip on Rin, back to camp.

He never should have let her go hunting.

As he made it back to camp, gasps rang out, and a scent of fear rippled through the air. And he'd bet he knew why.

"I did not do this," he growled, resenting the fact that he even had to say it.

Sesshomaru carefully laid Inuyasha down, Rin still held protectively against the hanyou's chest. He tried to dislodge her, only for his unconscious brother to growl in warning.

At that moment, the scent of Inuyasha's blood caught his attention, while the wind picked up around them.

Inuyasha was transforming. While unconscious. With Rin still in his arms.

Where the fuck was Tetsusaiga?

Damn it! A foreign feeling he vaguely recalled as panic flooded him and he took a breath, panic had never helped anything it could be ignored like pain. Ah!

He cursed having only one arm this would be much easier with claws instead and hoping his aim was as good as he thought lashed his whip again. He struck both of Inu's hands, unfortunately leaving a small burn on Rin's shoulder where the oversized robe had slipped down. No time to worry about it, Inuyasha hissed and instinctively pulled his hands back. Sesshomaru yanked Rin clear and leaped back.

"Priestess can you sense the sword?" he asked calmly as Inuyasha got shakily to his feet.

Kagome nodded and took off. "It's not far! Hold on, Inuyasha! I'm getting Tetsusaiga!"

Sesshomaru watched warily as the transformed hanyou swayed, half-closed red eyes peering around at him and the pack. The monk's right hand was twitching, though he looked tormented.

"Inuyasha, please return to your senses. You're not in danger anymore."

At the monk's words, his demonized brother looked straight at Sesshomaru and growled fiercely. He frowned, only for the growl to get louder, he could smell fear and grief rolling off the Monk.

Very well.

He smoothed out his expression and spoke quietly. "I am not threatening you or your pack, Inuyasha. There's no need for this," he caught the monk's eye at the end and saw him relax and lower his hand.

The growl softened just a fraction and velvety ears pricked towards him. The growl softened more as the glowing red eyes dropped to Rin, still unconscious. Inuyasha's head tilted to the side, and the growling subsided completely, only to be replaced by a rough whining sound.

Sesshomaru was incredulous that there seemed to be some measure of control in the younger male, and he spoke softly. "She is ok, Inuyasha. You saved her."

At that moment, Kagome came running into the clearing with Tetsusaiga. Going to Inuyasha's side, she quickly pressed the blade into his hand.

Immediately, the demon began to revert to his hanyou form.

Sesshomaru felt the tension leave him though his body language didn't change. A fight with demonized Inuyasha would be a close thing but he could win, he'd done it before. However he had no desire to see if he could do so without Rin being killed in the crossfire.

He maintained his position between Inuyasha and their pack as his brother calmed. He realized that the Kitsune was actively hiding behind him. huh.

Inuyasha started panting roughly as his demon blood receded and awareness flooded him. "Fuck me," he whispered, unable to speak any louder. He blinked, taking in the sight of his brother, tall and perfect, standing guard between him and his family.

Sesshomaru...had been protecting his pack from the sadistic form of himself.

Blood loss was making him dizzy and confused as he managed to breathe, "Thank you...aniki," before crashing to the ground.

"I owe you nothing now," Sesshomaru said. The effect was somewhat lessened by the fact that Inuyasha was unconscious, a fine time for him to not keep his mouth shut as was his wont.

Inuyasha words caught up to him, _aniki - _brother, family. Only a hanyou would think in such ridiculous terms. What did that mean to him...people to prove yourself to or to prove themselves to you. For once in his life he had no clue what side of the scale he was on.

Worse, he wasn't sure what side he _should_be on.

He watched as Kagome and Shippo approached him and Rin, while Miroku and Sango went to Inuyasha's side. He had just handed his girl over to Kagome when a thought struck him.

Since when did he use their names, even in his thoughts? Until now, they had been the priestess, kitsune, monk, and slayer. Exclusively.

For the first time in a very long time, Sesshomaru felt the sensation of being in trouble.


	3. Partings & Reunions

Chapter 3: Partings and Reunions

We still own nothing.

Collaboration with the lovely Time

Warnings: Language, attitudes, a few feels sprinkled here and there, headhopping but should still be followable :)

* * *

_Previously - Since when did he use their names, even in his thoughts? Until now, they had been the priestess, kitsune, monk, and slayer. Exclusively._

_For the first time in a very long time, Sesshomaru felt the sensation of being in trouble._

_._

Inuyasha looked at his pack and try to hide the fear he felt. "Di...Is everyone okay?"

"You didn't hurt anyone," Miroku said quietly not wanting to embarrass him.

"She's okay, it's just a minor burn," Kagome said as she approached the youkai with Rin in her arms.

"I was aware," Sesshomaru replied in a clipped tone.

Kagome frowned, annoyed at his uncaring response, but still went to hand Rin back to him. The girl shied in her arms and Sesshomaru's eyes widened before turning hard again.

"They left the food behind," he said and strode away presumably to recover it.

Kagome applied burn cream to Rin's shoulder, speaking gently, "Rin, you know Sesshomaru would never hurt you on purpose."

"But he did hurt me," Rin replied in a pained voice. Kagome was speechless. Tears welled in the girl's eyes and she ran off. Kagome almost followed, but Rin sat down on the grass a short distance away hugging her knees and she decided it would be better to give the girl some time to calm down.

Inuyasha's ear twitched where he was lying down, on the other side of the small clearing. Dealing with his demon blood always left him feeling guilty and exhausted, with a sense of shame and embarrassment. _'Damn, I made Sesshomaru hurt his girl. Just when we were making a bit of progress...'_

He resolved that one way or another, he would learn to control the vicious creature inside him.

_'Whatever it takes.'_

XxXX

Sesshomaru made his way to where he'd found Inuyasha and Rin, steadfastly _refusing_ to think of the fear in those big brown eyes.

He found the boar and quail easily enough, and nearby, a hearty collection of mushrooms and a few tuber vegetables and herbs.

While Inuyasha's claws had clearly brought down the beasts, it was equally clear that his ward had been responsible for gathering the other things. He stared at the pile for a minute, then carefully gathered each piece.

He returned, deposited the food and moved over to where Rin was morosely picking flowers. She skittered away with terror in her eyes. He stared at her a moment before walking away.

"Jaken."

"Sesshomaru-sama," the little demon cried rushing to him.

"We're leaving?" he yelped, he was getting comfortable in the camp and Sesshomaru was around to beat him less. Sesshomaru ignored him.

"You can't just abandon her!" Kagome cried out.

"I never asked her to follow me. If she no longer chooses to, then I have no reason to be here."

XxXx

Inuyasha watched as Sesshomaru strode across the clearing, away from the pack, with Jaken scurrying behind him as quickly as possible to try and keep up. The youkai looked as impassive as ever, but Inuyasha could smell a thread of hurt in his scent.

He spoke under his breath, knowing Sesshomaru could hear him when no one else would. "We'll keep her with us. She'll be safe."

His brother kept walking, but Inuyasha's sharp eyes caught the slightest of nods as Sesshomaru disappeared among the trees.

Kagome trotted up to Inuyasha, smelling angry.

"You're just going to let him leave her? Do you have any idea what that could do to a kid her age?" she lowered her voice so Rin wouldn't hear, "Especially one who's already lost her parents?"

Inuyasha frowned, but knew that since Kagome came from a loving family, she probably didn't see. "She'll be fine. Right now, she's scared of him, so it'd be worse if we tried to force her to stay near him. A little space will do them good, trust me."

Kagome looked doubtful but couldn't think of a way to respond and she knew Inuyasha felt guilty enough without her making him feel bad for Rin so she let it go.

Miroku and Sango approached now that the drama had died down.

"Are we heading out?" Miroku asked, normally they would after lunch so it was more a matter of if Inuyasha was up to it.

"Yeah let's go." Maybe moving would help Rin.

They'd been traveling for less than an hour, when Inuyasha remembered that they had been intending to hunt down firerats for more of the armor-like cloth.

He changed direction, heading eastward.

Miroku tilted his head. "Where are we going now?"

He smiled, glad to have a task to focus on. "We're going to the mountains in the east. We're gonna get more hair of the firerat to make protective clothing."

He scented relief, and realised everyone was glad to have a mission to concentrate on.

"Um not to be a killjoy but do you know anyone who can weave firerat hair?" Miroku asked.

That brought Inuyasha up short.

"Well sure...I mean there's gotta be tons of people right? It can't be that hard."

"There were two in my village but they both died in the massacre," Sango said, her voice was hard but Inuyasha could smell the beginnings of tears.

"Kaede-sama maybe?" Kagome offered and Inuyasha brightened.

"Good idea she must know!" he said.

"Or know someone who does," Sango added, already mounting Kirara.

"Meet ya at the firerats," Inuyasha replied, already refocused.

"I should have gone with her to..."

"Harass her?" Kagome asked sweetly.

"Grope her." Inuyasha said at the same time. Shippo snickered.

"Sit!" Inuyasha slammed to the ground and looked up to see Kagome looking pointedly at the kids.

"I was going say 'protect'," Miroku put in.

"Liar!" three voices shot back. Rin sighed - if Jaken was making this much noise he would have been...oh. Rin experimentally picked up a small stone and threw it at Miroku.

As the little rock pinged off the monk's shoulder, everybody chuckled. Shippo gave her a high-five, while Inuyasha's eyes, so like Lord Sesshomaru's, held approval. "Nice one."

Kagome interjected, "As long as you don't do it all the time, ok?"

Rin nodded, following as the group continued to the east.

XxXx

Sango knocked on Kaede's door as the sun was setting.

"Ah welcome back child. Are you injured?"

"No Kaede-sama I was just wondering if you would be able to weave us fire-rat robes if we brought the hides?"

"Sorry child but no. I know one who can but she was older than I and I do not know if she still lives. I know another three who might have the skill but you would have to ask."

Sango received a list of the four names and a roof for the night. The next morning she made Kaede-sama breakfast as thanks and set off to track down the names.

x

Inuyasha was getting a bit worried when Sango hadn't returned by morning. Miroku paced by the dead campfire, gnawing a fish.

"We should go back for her."

"She probably just decided to spend the night, and it's not like we're walking into a serious fight," Inuyasha replied.

Miroku didn't seem appeased by his answer. Ever since the 'incident' with the poison, he'd been overly protective and worried over the slayer.

Inuyasha sighed, watching as Rin went through the daily practice that Sango had taught her, but she looked a bit down. He was struck by an idea, and was kinda proud since that didn't seem to happen to him as often as the others.

As Rin finished her exercises, Inuyasha called her to his side, along with Miroku. "Miroku, why don't you teach Rin about being a person of spiritual strength? And Kagome? You could tell her about being a priestess and archery?"

Shippo piped up. "Can _I_ teach her something too?"

Inuyasha smiled. "Sure. You can teach her about your Fox-magic."

If Rin were occupied with lessons, she'd have less time to miss Sesshomaru, and if the pack were busy teaching and observing, they would have less time to worry about Sango.

Two days later they made camp outside the fire-rat valley, ready to attack at dawn. They had just finished dinner except for Miroku who was listlessly nibbling a fish when Kirara landed in their midst.

"What took you so long?!" Miroku cried, greeting her with his traditional hug-grope, and receiving Hiraikotsu to the head as was their standard courtship ritual.

"Kaede-sama couldn't do it so she gave me a list of some others who might. I've been tracking them down."

"And?" Inuyasha prompted sharply, getting in her face in his excitement.

Sango smiled, though she looked exhausted. "I found one. Give Kirara and I the night to rest, we can get the hides tomorrow, then head south."

Inuyasha felt impatient but nodded. "Ok. Here, I'll go get some food for you and Kirara. Just sit down and rest until I get back."

The slayer nodded, slumping against a tree. Everyone moved to fawn over her as Inuyasha headed to the nearby stream to fish.

He brought his catch back and made sure Sango and Kirara ate their fill undisturbed. As everyone bedded down, Inuyasha perched on a wide branch. He was restless and it took him a while to realize why.

He hadn't noticed while they were travelling and fighting but he had felt secure knowing that the demon was near camp. It was stupid because Sesshomaru wasn't likely to come to their aid but it had, in some corner of his mind, put him at ease. As he began to drift off the last thought in his mind was of his brother.

_Sesshomaru, where are you?_

XxXx

Sesshomaru meanwhile was scouring the countryside and making full use of Jaken's contacts, looking for a weapon that would give him some precision. He never wanted to be in a position where he could accidentally hurt someone he didn't wish to again.

He had a lead on a weapon built from the claws of a blood-reaver, that would suit his purpose. All he had to do was find someone who could craft it once he had the requisite materials. That was proving difficult, no matter how many weapon smiths he threatened they all swore that only the demon slayers knew how and they were all dead now.

Still he was determined, so sooner or later he'd have a set of Ko gyoko, he flexed his claws, it was good to have a goal again. It would have been better with Rin, but he pushed the thought aside. He was born in darkness, had lived in it his entire life, and he refused to mourn its return.

XxXx

Dawn rose bright and clear, but dark clouds threatened on the distant horizon.

Inuyasha ate breakfast with the others; everyone seemed hyped up for the hunt. They had decided quick, clean kills would be best, no suffering, and it'd keep the hides from being damaged.

Shippo and Rin would wait just outside the valley on Ah-Un. Inuyasha had figured Rin didn't need to be involved yet, and Shippo probably didn't need to see any dead creatures get skinned, on account of what had happened to his father.

Inuyasha and Miroku were on foot, Sango and Kagome on Kirara. They entered the valley, ready for anything.

Kagome sniped from Kirara's back and soon found that a direct hit just made the rats disappear in a burst of blue light, so she aimed for the legs to lame them while Sango stunned batches with Hiraikotsu.

Miroku and Inuyasha then dispatched them by bludgeoning or a quick slice to the throat respectively. In short order they had fourteen clean corpses. One for each hunter plus Kirara, Shippo, and Inuyasha had snagged an extra for his brother on a whim. The other seven would pay for the smith's work.

When Kagome began to look a little green, she turned away and played with Kirara while Inuyasha and Sango set to skinning their catches. Miroku took watch, saying "Isn't it a waste to leave the meat?"

Inuyasha hesitated, but Sango smiled. "I saw a village just outside the valley. We can let them know that these are here. My guess is the firerats have given them trouble. They'll be happy to know there's a few less to deal with, and that there's meat for the taking."

Inuyasha smiled.

"I bet the women- I mean _villagers_ \- will be very grateful," Miroku said, rising to inform them immediately. Hiraikotsu hit him on the head.

"You guys finish up here, _we'll _take Kirara to the village." Kagome sighed in relief as the pair put the bloodshed behind them, she shifted a little and Sango wondered if she noticed the way she'd inadvertently thrust against her butt. Kagome shifted again and Sango became very aware of how long it'd been since she'd had anything but Kirara between her legs. She suddenly wished her slayer outfit wasn't quite so snug.

Once the village was informed and everyone had reunited outside the valley, the pack traveled South for a few hours. A while before sunset Inuyasha, sensing the weariness everyone was feeling, called a halt in a small glade bordered by a stream.

"So who is this woman? You're sure she can do it?" Inuyasha asked.

"Yeah, she was from a different clan of slayers but she definitely has the skill," Sango said, sounding distracted.

He was about to ask what was distracting her, when he caught a faint scent of arousal. He glanced up, expecting Sango's gaze to be on Miroku.

Instead, the bright brown eyes were focused on Kagome as she bent to stir the cook pot.

Inuyasha's ears flicked in surprise, "You're into Kagome?"

Sango blushed scarlet, he really had no filter, "No it's not...she's all yours." It was just riding so close and Kagome always got _really_ close. Yeah that was all.

"I don't want her," Inuyasha said a little too quickly. "Not like that anyway."

Luckily, they'd kept their voices low, and Inuyasha was glad for that as the priestess approached them.

"Supper will be done soon, you guys."

Inuyasha nodded and went to watch Miroku train Rin in the basics of the staff. As he did he saw the way Miroku taught her tricks to compensate for her small size and human abilities. It occurred to him that perhaps similar strategies could help him against full demons.

He smiled and began to practise, trying to convince himself that it had nothing to do with the fact he might face Sesshomaru across swords again one day. Despite the fact that every idea he came up with was tailored to the agile demon's style.

The next day they arrived at the small village Sango had been leading them to. Rin seemed sulkier than normal and Inuyasha encouraged her to play with the village kids while they spoke to the smith.

"These hides are very good quality," she said stiffly.

"I know what I'm doing eh? Now can you weave it?" Inuyasha asked.

"Don't be so rude," Kagome snapped and his ears wilted a little.

"Hmm I can, but it will take me a few days to do this much."

"We could use the rest anyway," Sango said and left.

"She doesn't like it here," Kagome whispered.

"Can you blame her?" Miroku asked following his flame to offer comfort.

Inuyasha sighed as he left the smith's house. He chose a tree that overlooked the village so he could keep an eye on his pack as they did their own things among the people.

Having such a talented smith in their midst meant that the people were used to strangers and guests among their number. Inuyasha had gotten a few side-eyes but no hostility.

The villagers had offered them rooms and meals in exchange for some basic labor. Inuyasha had politely declined a room but accepted the meal, and made it clear to his friends that they could use the rooms.

He glanced over his shoulder towards where Rin and Ah-Un had made their own mini-camp outside the village. The girl had seemed nervous about being around so many people, and Inuyasha had decided not to try making her stay.

He sighed and, after another look at the village where everyone else was making themselves comfy, hopped down from his tree to go check on his brother's ward.

"Hey you doing alright?" Inuyasha asked. She looked up from where she was braiding a couple weeds.

"I think I know now," she said quietly.

"Huh?"

"Why Sesshomaru-sama never answered when I asked him that."

Inuyasha struggled to come up with a proper way to respond to the seemingly random line of conversation.

Finally, he decided to just see where it went, "Ok, so why?"

The little girl looked up at him very seriously, "Because he didn't want to say when he wasn't ok. But he didn't want to lie."

Inuyasha shrugged and gave her a small smile. "Maybe you're right. Who knows, huh?"

He sat down next to her and watched her braid weeds together. "Whatcha doing?"

She smiled brightly. "For Ah-Un!"

The dragon padded over and laid by the girl, lowering one head while the other kept watch. Rin slipped loops of braided weeds and flowers around the powerful neck and laid one like a crown on top of the head. "There you go, Ah! I'll have yours in a bit, Un."

Inuyasha helped braid the long grasses, enjoying some quiet time with the sweet little human.

XxXx

It'd been close to a couple of weeks since _that_ day, and Rin felt lost. Everyone else had been thrilled to finally receive their robes in varying shades of brilliant red, but since the day Lord Sesshomaru had saved her from the wolves, she'd never been apart from him this long.

Even though her days were filled with 'lessons' that she enjoyed and excelled at, it felt like a piece of her was missing.

She snuggled against Inuyasha morosely, it'd taken her a little while to get used to human contact but now she was like a barnacle. He had expected Sesshomaru to stay close and keep an eye on Rin but he'd been out of scent within an hour of leaving and Inuyasha hadn't smelled him since.

Inuyasha took pity on her and decided to try his hand at helping, "Look...you know he was trying to help you right?"

Rin huffed and pouted but finally nodded assent, "So why are you so upset?"

"Because he's never hurt me before," she replied.

"But you just said..."

Rin made a frustrated noise, "I trusted him but...then he hurt me."

Inuyasha's eyes widened, "You feel betrayed?"

"What's that mean?" Rin asked. Inuyasha sighed, how was she this innocent? Even Shippo wasn't.

"It's a word that means the feeling you were describing," he explained carefully.

"Oh...then yes I feel betrayed," she tested the word. Inuyasha was at a loss, he'd been on both sides of that coin, hell none of this would have even happened if he hadn't lost control. He suddenly had an urge to fix it.

"Listen I was the one who was threatening you, because I," his voice cracked and he swallowed, "I couldn't control the demon blood. If anyone betrayed you it was me."

Rin shook her head fiercely, "It isn't the same."

"Maybe not, but you want to know a secret?" Like any little kid she leaned in. "When that happens if I hurt or even threaten one of my pack, it...tears me up. Not for a day or two, but for weeks," he had more to say but stopped, his eyes were starting to burn.

He turned his head a bit to hide his eyes, glad this was a human that couldn't smell tears.

When he thought he could speak without his voice shaking, he said softly, "Hey Rin, isn't it time for your lesson with Shippo?"

The little girl reluctantly pulled away, but seemed excited about her 'class'. "Yes, he's teaching me to see through illusions."

Inuyasha watched with a small smile as Rin ran over to the kitsune, who was standing on a rock and looking very important.

He sighed and headed for where Kagome and Sango waited, ready to help him with his own lessons in dodging and evading attacks.

That evening Rin was nuzzling with him again and whispered, "I think I want to go back."

His eyes widened in surprise, "We can definitely take you but are you sure?"

She nodded, "They all forgive _you_," she indicated the rest of the pack, "Beside...I don't want Sesshomaru-sama 'torn-up'."

Inuyasha tilted his head curiously. "What makes you think he'd be 'torn-up?"

Rin cocked her head, "You said you would be."

Inuyasha bit the inside of his cheek, wondering how to explain, and surprised she hadn't noticed that he and his brother had_ very_ different personalities.

"That doesn't necessarily mean he feels the same way, Rin, and you know this," he said firmly but gently. "I honestly don't know how not having you around is affecting him. Maybe it's upsetting, maybe not. And if there's a chance it's not, are you really sure you want to be at his side again? Like I said, we'll take you if you want - I can always find him."

He grimaced; he hadn't meant to say that last part out loud.

Rin nodded firmly and at dawn they set out to find Sesshomaru. That wouldn't be awkward or anything...maybe they could leave her within scenting distance.

It took two days for him to pick up the trail and though he said nothing it quickly became apparent that Sesshomaru was actively avoiding them. Finally he felt his brother's aura approaching rapidly and the demon appeared before him.

"Why do you follow me?" he asked sharply as he tried to ignore the ache he felt at seeing Rin creeping closer.

"Ah...uh...Rin asked us to return her and I understand if..."

Sesshomaru turned away quickly, the sense of relief was almost overwhelming. He could smell Rin following again and felt as though claws seized his throat, what an odd sensation he wasn't sad.

"Uh Rin are you sure this is okay?" Inuyasha asked. It didn't seem like a particularly warm reception.

"It's great!" she cried joyously, clearly ecstatic to be reunited with her lord.

"If she wishes to follow she may," Sesshomaru added coldly. Inuyasha's sharp ears picked up a hint of strain in the tone.

Inuyasha watched for a moment, the faint tension in the demon's aura making _him _tense. "Umm, Sesshomaru?"

The youkai paused, but didn't look at him. They had all grown fond of Rin over their time together and she _was_ learning a lot, besides as Kagome had pointed out she was safer with them.

Inuyasha swallowed, "Umm, well, we've all been giving her lessons in different things, and we've still got stuff we could teach her. So...would it bother you if we traveled together again?"

Rin grinned up at Sesshomaru. "I'd like that, Sesshomaru-sama! They've been teaching me lots of things! Would...would you like to see?"

"Later," Sesshomaru answered, carefully not looking at Rin. "I will get Jaken and Ah-Un now." It was a bad excuse, Jaken would track them down eventually, but it would be quicker this way and put distance between him and Inuyasha's sharp nose.

"Oh yay Jaken!" Rin yelped, happy to have her two packs joined again.

Inuyasha kept his expression as neutral as was possible for him. Sesshomaru's scent was off. There was relief and a brittle form of some positive feeling he wouldn't quite call joy. There were some other scents that he couldn't identify simply because they were foreign on the demon.

But, hey, play it cool. No need to offend the youkai, those burning claws were still fresh in his memory.

Inuyasha smiled to himself, feeling very mature at the moment. "Ok Rin, why don't you have Miroku give today's lesson on spiritual powers while Sesshomaru gets the others, ok?"

Rin nodded and raced over to Miroku. After a short lecture she began meditating, Miroku insisted that she have an extremely high ability to do so before he moved on to anything more practical in the spiritual field. Miroku smiled - it was taking her longer to achieve today, she really was excited.

He walked over to Inuyasha and lowered his voice, "Demons around?"

"What?" Inuyasha asked obviously lost in thought.

"You look like something's wrong," Miroku said, though it was obvious from his response that whatever the problem it was nothing dangerous.

"It's probably nothing, Sesshomaru just smelled...off," Inuyasha said.

"Like sick?" Miroku asked.

"And you care?" Kagome teased with a knowing smile.

"No, I don't think so," Inuyasha huffed, pointedly ignoring Kagome and tried to put the oddity out of his mind.

XxXx

Sesshomaru took his time getting back to Jaken, going so far as to hunt a deer, letting it escape a bit before chasing it down and letting it go again, lost in the pure, feral pleasure of the hunt. Eventually he'd worked up enough of an appetite to kill and eat it. Then, feeling much more like himself, circled back to Jaken.

The toad-imp had been unusually quiet lately, and Sesshomaru gazed at him for a moment before speaking. "Jaken, we will be traveling with Inuyasha's group again."

At first, his vassal just stared at him with a look of confusion and disbelief. Then, "We'll be with Rin again, me'lord?"

"Yes."

"Oooh hoo that is wonderful news, me'lord! Come, Ah-Un, we are going to see Rin!" The dragon roared softly and surged forward, dragging Jaken off his feet.

Sesshomaru turned to lead the way, firmly ignoring the behavior that rather matched how he felt deep inside.

Jaken was very happy, his lord hadn't been so angry since the Tetsusaiga fiasco and hopefully being around Rin would make things go back to normal. Besides Jaken kind of missed the noisy little thing.

XxXx

"Let's set up camp, you guys," Inuyasha said as he walked the edges of the clearing, discreetly sniffing the air.

He watched as Miroku released Rin from her meditation with a few words of constructive criticism. The little girl ran to Sango's side to help care for Kirara, then to Kagome to help cook dinner and hear about the powers of a priestess, enthralled by all she was learning.

Finally, just as the meal was being served and Kagome was instructing Rin in basic math, the scent of Sesshomaru drifted by. Inuyasha looked up to see him and his vassal, along with the two-headed dragon, entering the clearing.

Inuyasha felt a bit of relief when he noticed that the demon's scent was the familiar solid, uninteresting one he'd grown to hate. Surprised at himself he decided that he simply didn't like weird smells, they set his nerves on edge. Still he approached the youkai.

"Took you long enough." he said and realized that the question he actually wanted to ask was, 'Is everything alright?' well whatever the bastard _had_ protected the others from him.

Sesshomaru took in the human relief in Inuyasha's expression and scent. Odd.

"Were you afraid you'd kill someone while I was gone?" Sesshomaru asked. It was a cheap shot but the fact that, wanting to be left behind or not, he'd left Rin with someone who could easily turn on her had lost him more sleep over the weeks than he'd care to admit. Then again they'd looked after her when he couldn't so he should probably not goad Inuyasha and just avoid the pack as he had before.

Inuyasha felt a growl bubbling up in his chest. What the ever-lovin' _fuck_ had Sesshomaru just said?! His hand twitched towards Tetsusaiga's hilt. He was gonna fuck this youkai up so bad for that...

Then, inexplicably, Sesshomaru seemed to hesitate, casting his gaze aside. He said nothing, and his expression didn't really change. But it seemed to Inuyasha that there was a faint tightness around his brother's eyes.

Huh. Maybe...maybe that question hadn't _really_ been about him, low blow that it was. Maybe Sesshomaru really was 'torn-up' by what had happened.

"Yeah, whatever," he muttered as his anger trickled away. He looked to see that everyone had almost finished eating. He walked away to get his own serving, murmuring, "You oughtta let Rin show you what she's been learning."

He quickly made his way over to the others before the demon could admonish him for telling him what to do.

Sesshomaru wondered what had made Inuyasha back off, his brother wasn't the type to be scared off especially by him.

He put it out of his mind, it didn't matter now but as he went to Rin he called, "Inuyasha, we need to talk later."

Rin beamed as he approached and sprinted over before stopping short still smiling.

"You said you had some new techniques to demonstrate?"

The little girl nodded, then executed a set of whirling kicks and swift punches that were impressive for a small human. Then she retrieved her bokken, looking at him sheepishly. "Since you weren't here, Inuyasha has been teaching me. He said I have to be careful though, because 'charging in' works for him, but might get me hurt."

Sesshomaru watched with carefully disguised interest as Rin began going through simple sword forms, surprisingly precise in her moves.

After a few minutes, she stopped, only slightly out of breath. "I've also been meditating, and learning to see through illusions. Kagome said she's going to teach me archery, too."

Sesshomaru gave a slight nod, then remembered what Kagome had said about praise. "You have worked hard, I expect you to continue."

His ward smiled brighter than the sun. He didn't think he'd ever seen such a happy look on her face.

Night fell with the camp arranged as usual within a small meadow. He was secretly deeply pleased that Rin had chosen to sleep with Jaken and Ah-Un. He made a mental note to take it easier on the hanyou, he could have made the re-joining of the packs far more difficult and despite Sesshomaru's reservations they had done well with Rin. No sooner had he had the thought, then he picked up Inuyasha's scent laced with fear.

That was strange the others were in sight on the other side of the meadow, there were no signs of an attack. He woke Jaken to make sure the toad could get everyone away just in case. Then he was across the meadow to figure out what the threat was.

XxXx

Inuyasha stood over the bodies of his pack, blood dripped from his claws as the beast in him howled with pleasure. Unlike in real life he'd seen everything he'd done, he simply couldn't stop it.

He sat up screaming, staring around wildly expecting to see bodies, and was vaguely aware of a hand grasping his shoulder.

"Merely a dream."

He stared for a moment uncomprehending at his brother, who sat calmly beside him, not even looking at him. Still the calm was infectious, clearly there was nothing to worry about and he was immediately ashamed that he'd taken comfort in Sesshomaru's presence. _He_ was supposed to be the strong one, protecting his pack.

Sesshomaru dropped his hand.

"Dogs are social creatures. Your calm is instinct, nothing more," he said quietly, obviously having picked up the shame in Inuyasha's scent.

Inuyasha glanced around, surprised to see that his scream hadn't woken the others. He sighed and rubbed one hand over his face.

When Sesshomaru didn't immediately move away, he took a shaky breath and whispered, "My demon blood came out, and I...I killed everyone."

He remembered seeing more bodies among his pack, "I killed all of you. And my demon side enjoyed it."

He didn't know why he was telling the youkai; Sesshomaru surely didn't give a flying fuck about his stupid nightmare, but he couldn't stop - he had to tell _someone _and he certainly couldn't tell the pack. "Usually, I black out and don't remember...but in my nightmare I could see everything I was doing."

He furiously rubbed both hands over his face. He would _not_ cry right now. Shaking his head to dispel images of Sesshomaru and everyone else falling under his claws, he muttered, "Thanks for waking me. I'm sorry to trouble you."

There was silence between them for a long minute, then he heard, "It was no trouble."

Silence reigned for a while again and when the salty scent had faded a bit Sesshomaru spoke, "That was what I wanted to speak to you about earlier. You're a danger to Rin as you are now, it seems you're aware of this too."

"No fucking shit!" Inuyasha snapped leaping to his feet. Here he'd just bared his soul, almost in tears and his brother was using it for ammo! He should have expected that but still.

"You must learn to control it. It would be in my interest to assist," Sesshomaru said and braced his ears for another tirade.

Inuyasha opened his mouth to snarl, but froze as the words registered. "What?"

Sesshomaru just gazed at him levelly as he rose to his own feet.

Inuyasha stared up at the taller male, still unable to believe what he'd heard. "You..._do_ you think I can learn to control it? With your help?"

His brother gave a short nod.

Oh gods! If Sesshomaru thought he could do it, it _must_ be possible! He squared his shoulders and set his jaw determinedly. "What do I gotta do?"

Sesshomaru just stared a moment. It was that easy? No arguing, no assertion that he didn't help?

"Now? Sleep. We'll start tomorrow," with that Sesshomaru returned to his side of the meadow.

Inuyasha sensed Kagome approaching and turned to see her stumble over yawning, "What was that about?" she asked worried that the truce was no longer in effect.

Inuyasha just_ knew_ if he had a tail, it'd be wagging, as pathetic as that image was. But that didn't dampen his excitement.

"Kagome, Sesshomaru said he'd help me learn how to control my demon side! I don't know how long it'll take, but one day, I might not be a threat anymore!"

Kagome, still a bit asleep, blinked. "That's great news, but...well, won't it be dangerous?"

Inuyasha felt the ridiculous smile on his face, stretching unused muscles, as he glanced over to where Sesshomaru's group was. "If anyone can help, _and_ handle my demon side, it's him."


	4. Control

4: Control

Warnings: Language, violence, some hardcore feels, headhopping

*~* Also, Ch3 was posted last night, make sure you've read that ;)

CatPeach - wanted to thank you for your review :)

* * *

Inuyasha woke to find a small weight on his chest and looked down to find Rin snuggled on top of him. "Uh..." he lifted her off as he rose "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted company," Rin said sleepily. _Oh_.

He was about to say more when Sesshomaru joined them.

"I see you're finally awake," he said and began walking away with no mention of Rin's being there.

"Where are you going Sesshomaru-sama?" Rin called after him.

"Inuyasha and I need to do something. You're training today?"

"After breakfast!" she piped happily.

"Work hard."

She nodded vigorously as Inuyasha followed his brother into the forest where there would be less risk. The situation felt deeply awkward though Sesshomaru didn't seem to care that Rin had gone to him.

He shook off the thought, and alerted to the older canine as they stopped a fair distance from camp. The tall youkai turned and looked at him, that golden gaze so intense that he felt his skin tingle but he stayed quiet, as well, waiting.

Kagome trotted up. "I should be here with you. I can use the beads if things get out of hand," her voice shook with fear but she sounded and smelled resolute.

Sesshomaru shook his head, "It would interfere with the process."

Kagome frowned, crestfallen and Inuyasha felt his nerves return.

"Would you mind staying with the pack and if something goes wrong…"

Kagome smiled, "Of course," she said returning to camp.

Inuyasha smiled relieved, he noted with surprise a tiny bit of hurt in his brother's scent but wasn't about to ask.

Finally, Sesshomaru spoke. "Tell me what you know about your demon side."

Inuyasha lowered his eyes, ears laying back as he tried to answer as steadily as possible. "It happens when my life is in danger and I'm separated from Tetsusaiga. I...I black out. Apparently, I can't tell friends from enemies. Either that...or...I just don't care in that form. The only things that have stopped me are being knocked unconscious or Kagome 'sit'ting me. Sometimes I remember like little flashes, and it's..."

He sighed and muttered, "It scares me more than anything else does." _Except maybe you._

Sesshomaru carefully guarded his expression but he was thrown, "Scares you?"

"Yeah, so what?" Inuyasha snapped getting his fur up. He'd never been comfortable talking like this and Sesshomaru was the last person on earth he wanted to see him as weak, but he needed to control the demon and knew he couldn't on his own. Ugh he was so frustrated he could have cried. He begged every deity he could think of to keep him from doing just that and braced for the litany of hanyou insults.

"I've never known you to be scared of anything."

Inuyasha blinked._ What?_ Did the powerful, merciless youkai not realize what kinda fear he himself had driven into his little brother?

Well, shit on a shingle, Inuyasha sure as _fuc_k wasn't about to tell him if he didn't already know! At least, not right now.

He shrugged, striving for a casual tone. "There's not a whole hella lot that scares me, but my demon form does, ok? That's why I'm willing to go along with whatever probably painful plan you have, so I can eventually control it. I don't want to be this...monster."

He met Sesshomaru's eyes. "You're always in control of your nature. Not that I want to be like you, but...no matter how much it hurts, I'm sure that you can help make this happen."

Sesshomaru nodded, "The easiest place to start would be confidence. You have plenty of it. The demon needs to know you're its alpha but _you_ also need to know. To start meditate, take every feeling, every thought and master it." he paused for a moment and continued more quietly. "You can't ignore them. Take the most painful thoughts, the things that enrage you, the things that hurt, accept them and mold them into your tools."

Inuyasha blinked and bit his lip. "I'm just gonna warn you now, I might not be great at this." Sensing impatience in the older male's aura, he held up his hands. "I didn't say I wasn't gonna try, ok? I'm really determined to control that vicious bastard."

Trying to remember how he'd seen Miroku meditating, he removed Tetsusaiga from his waist so he could sit comfortably. He crossed his legs and, laying his Fang on the ground, rested his hands on his knees.

He glanced up at Sesshomaru. "Am I doing this right so far?

XxXx

Sesshomaru gave a short nod, secretly impressed with how well-behaved his rather feral brother was right now. Inuyasha took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

For several minutes, it was quiet. Sesshomaru watched carefully, finding his attention drawn to the pointed ears. They seemed like an indicator of the thoughts going through Inuyasha's mind; they sort of shivered, then laid back in fear. After a little bit they slowly tilted back up before laying back at a different angle to signify aggression.

The expressive ears matched the fluctuating scent of the hanyou. Fear, aggression, then an almost wounded scent of pain. Shame.

Sesshomaru was not a supremely curious being, yet he found himself wanting to know what the younger male thought of.

To his surprise, and secret approval, nearly an hour had passed before a golden eye slid open.

"Hey, Sesshomaru? Once I have all those thoughts, how do I 'mold them into my tools'? You make it sound like these negative thoughts can be useful somehow. I'm sorry, but I just don't see how."

"What's your worst memory?"

Forgetting himself Inuyasha snorted, "What's your's?" like hell he was gonna share that with the demon.

Sesshomaru thought, "You actually wish to know?"

Inuyasha said nothing but an ear twitch and the alertness of his scent gave him away.

"_If_ you master your demon I will tell you. Now your worst memory."

Inuyasha found his determination reinforced - to know something deeply personal about the demon just strengthened his already solid resolve to succeed. "Deal. Ok, I have a lot of shitty memories, so it's really hard to pick _the _worst."

Sesshomaru exhaled slowly, wondering what kind of human whining he was going to have to listen to.

"If it'll help control my blood though, I'll go over all of them with you."

Inuyasha sensed surprise, but kept talking, gaze focused on a space somewhere to the left of his brother. "So, one of the ones that hurts the most...one of my earliest memories is being called a half-breed for the first time. I was four, maybe five at the most. The villagers were playing kimari. I just...I wanted to play too. Wanted to be included."

He paused for a moment, plucking at some grass. "They called me a half-breed and threw the ball across the bridge, towards where Mother and I lived. Never realized why we didn't actually live in the village, not till later. Anyways, I chased the ball cause I was a dumb mutt even back then. By the time I got it...all the villagers had disappeared. I asked Mother what a half-breed was."

He sighed, fuck he was gonna cry but damn it all, this was to control his demon! So tears or no tears he was gonna finish the stupid fuckin' memory!

"Mother started crying. She knew what I was in for. Back then I didn't realize she was also crying cause she knew I'd outlive her and that she wouldn't be there for me when I finally realized nobody in this fuckin'_ world_ accepts an atrocity like me."

He shook his head, absolutely loathing himself for the burning in his eyes. "I went out to the bridge every day for _weeks_, holding that stupid ball, but nobody ever came back for it. After a month or so, I saw them...they had a new ball. They'd made another ball cause nobody wanted to touch the one I'd touched."

He clenched his jaw and stared at the ground, carving a mindless pattern into the soil with one claw. He waited until the ground wasn't quite so blurry before speaking in a low, hoarse voice that he didn't realize was suspiciously close to his demon's.

"I get that, for some reason, it's gonna be useful to tell you my worst memories if we're gonna control my demon. But, if it's not too much trouble...can we wait just a little bit before talking about another one?"

By time he was done Sesshomaru swore to himself that the next person he heard say 'hanyou' as anything other than a statement of fact was going to die slow.

He shook off the immediate reaction and nodded in answer to Inuyasha question, "Under any other circumstances I would leave now."

Inuyasha wanted to retort to that but didn't trust his voice and anyway he didn't blame the demon much, he knew how disgusting Sesshomaru must find the situation.

He would have given Inuyasha privacy if it didn't defeat the purpose of making him talk in the first place. Still he allowed some time to pass before he spoke again.

"Now think about it. What could you have done differently? What did you learn? When you have all the information you can get, whatever is left use. Does it make you feel angry? Find a suitable target to aim at. Weak? Let the desire to never feel that way again drive you. Last cast it aside, it has no power over you anymore it's giving you power."

Inuyasha nodded, steely resolve coursing through him. He got up to pace a little as he thought out loud. "What I could've done differently...I could've not tried to join in the first place. I could've not waited like a fuckin' dog waiting for its master. I could've -" he froze and whispered, "If I'd known it was gonna make her cry, I could've not asked Mother what a half-breed was."

He glanced to Sesshomaru, unconsciously seeking approval. He saw a slight nod and noticed that the amber eyes didn't look quite as cold as usual. He resumed pacing, muttering to himself but knowing his 'teacher' could clearly hear him.

"What I learned...ok it wasn't right then, but it was one of the first things that taught me how people view me. I learned I'm looked down on and despised for something I have no control over."

Again he subconsciously sought approval, receiving another small nod as his brother spoke in an almost gentle tone. "Now, how does it make you feel?"

Inuyasha nodded, frowning in thought. "Mostly, it hurts. I...I didn't realize how much that still hurt. Not sure what to do with that. But it also does make me feel weak and angry. I_ hate_ those fuckin' villagers! So...let the desire to not feel that way again drive me?"

The youkai inclined his head, and Inuyasha sighed. "Ok. I can do that. But the anger...I don't have a 'suitable target'. Unless you wanna spar?" He laughed at his pitiful joke, but the sound cracked pathetically. He closed his mouth and sighed again.

"I guess I'll have to wait until the pack is attacked by a demon. I swear I won't even need to draw Tetsusaiga if I remember to focus on my anger over that memory. My claws and fangs will be more than enough."

He rolled his head to pop his neck and cracked his fingers before facing Sesshomaru directly. "Ok, what now?"

"Keep doing that with every memory you mentioned, then we'll move on," he hesitated debating on how to word the next part.

"Shall I let you find me when you're done?" He assumed Inuyasha would want to continue alone but...just leaving without some kind of indication didn't seem right somehow.

Inuyasha hesitated, was Sesshomaru leaving his presence up to _him_?

"Well, I won't ask you to stay if you want to leave, but if it's all the same to you...would you mind staying nearby? In case I have a question? Or you can correct me if I'm doing something wrong?" he added, knowing this last one might tempt the proud youkai to stay.

Sesshomaru gave one of his barely-there nods. "Start with the worst ones, as they will be the hardest to master."

Inuyasha nodded and sat on the ground to try meditating again. Talking about his mother had derailed the other memories that he'd 'gathered'. He was unaware of the approving gaze that rested on him.

He heard Sesshomaru say quietly, "if it helps, you can try taking on memories that have something in common."

As Inuyasha filtered through his memories, one common element kept popping up, and he muttered under his breath, "I don't think you want me doing that."

"Why not?"

The voice sounded closer, and he opened his eyes to see his brother standing there. He took a deep breath, forcing his posture to stay relaxed. He did _not_ want this to turn into a fight, or for Sesshomaru to leave.

"The biggest thing some of my worst memories have in common...honestly, it's you."

That hardly surprised Sesshomaru, a month ago he would have taken secret pride in it, now... It was pointless to regret things in the past, time travel was not among his abilities.

"Understandable, just do it."

Inuyasha nodded, relieved that the formidable youkai hadn't reacted negatively, and somewhat...soothed that Sesshomaru had said it was 'understandable'. "Ok. I'll do my best."

He closed his eyes and took a few deep, slow breaths, bracing himself.

Then he let the memories wash over him one by one.

Gods, this already sucked.

_"Weak, worthless half-breed." "I despise the fact that my father's blood flows through your veins!"_

Seeing that poison-acid whip come at him, and knowing he couldn't dodge it. The agony of a clawed hand tearing through him.

His ears laid back in a combination of fear and anger, and his hands trembled. He clenched them into fists, but left them in his lap.

_"Disgusting." "Pathetic."_

Sesshomaru hated his human side, and didn't like him as a demon, either. He had three different forms, and not a one was good enough.

Before he even realized it was gonna happen, a small, broken whimper escaped him. He clapped a hand over his mouth as if that would stop those sharp ears from hearing it. Feeling his eyes burn, he refused to open them and see that same old contempt in his brother's gaze.

But, for some reason, he hoped that Sesshomaru would stay and not walk away yet again.

Sesshomaru wanted to leave—was this what desperation felt like? —he had no place there and Inuyasha couldn't possibly want him there but...he _had_ given Inuyasha a choice. He heard a small keening sound and looked down to see Inuyasha leaning subtly towards him, a tear running down his cheek.

He took a step back, Inuyasha had to do this alone he couldn't lean on another. Then he turned his back on the pup as a courtesy and waited.

Inuyasha sensed his 'teacher' step back and turn away. For a moment, pure agony ripped through him. Sesshomaru was disregarding his suffering yet again!  
He was trying, dammit! Trying to learn so he could control his demon and-

Inuyasha's eyes flew open as his thoughts ground to a halt.

_His_ demon. Not Sesshomaru's, but _his_.

The youkai could help, but it was ultimately up to _him_ to control the raging psychopath inside him.

And...Sesshomaru had to believe he could do it, or he wouldn't bother at all.

Feeling renewed, he sniffed once and rubbed a hand across his face. Then he smiled at his brother's back. "Hey Sesshomaru? Uhh, I totally get it if you don't want to or if you think it'd be a total waste of time, but do you think you could spar with me sometime?"

With his back still turned Sesshomaru let his lip quirk slightly, Inuyasha was stubborn and insufferable as ever. He shouldn't have doubted, it seemed the pup always had a little more fight left in him.

"Tomorrow you'll need to exhaust yourself and therefore the demon. If that's the way you wish to do it…" he let the sentence trail off.

Inuyasha smiled, as drained as he was he still felt excited, "Why wait?"

"Once that's done you'll need to face the demon immediately, you'll want to be mentally rested."

Inuyasha felt like he'd been dipped in a bucket of ice and was trying to imagine what facing his demon would be like when his brother spoke again.

"The meditation...are you alright?"

He barely registered the words, remembering his nightmare in vivid, unrelenting detail. He'd torn into them all...laughing as he did.

He jumped when a hand gripped his shoulder. "Inuyasha?"

He looked up to see Sesshomaru staring at him, the clawed hand loosened on his shoulder. He realized he was panting slightly, ears laid back in fear and worry. "I have...to face him?"

"Yes you must make him manifest and then force him to submit," Sesshomaru said calmly. He could feel the ha...Inuyasha trembling under his hand.

He really was terrified, the scent of his fear almost painful to the demon's nose. He tried to remember facing his own demon, shortly before his father had died. His father had refused to let him until he'd controlled his eagerness even so he'd been overconfident and won only barely.

The problem then had been that he enjoyed the demon too much and combined with overconfidence he'd been easily swept up in the bloodlust.

Inuyasha seemed to have the opposite problem but it would likely be just as dangerous. He wondered what the chances were that Inuyasha would listen to him anymore than he himself had listened to Inutaisho.

Inuyasha hated how small his voice sounded when he spoke. "I...I don't know how. I black out when that happens."

He felt the urge to hug his knees like a child, and barely stopped himself as he whispered, "Are you sure I can do this?"

"No I'm not sure, but if you remain calm and in control of yourself and you and the demon are exhausted first you should be able to maintain your...awareness." Sesshomaru replied. Inuyasha shook.

"How human are you?"

"If you don't think I'm demon enough why the fuck are we doing this!" Inuyasha growled

"Dogs usually ignore a scared dog. Attention equals praise, on an instinctive level the message is 'I'm right to be scared'. Humans though..." he meant Rin of course but that seemed offensive. He laid a hesitant hand on Inuyasha's shoulder.

Inuyasha was surprised by the hand returning to his shoulder. He almost shied away from it, but managed not to. The old fear still flooded him though and he hoped Sesshomaru had suddenly been afflicted with a stuffy nose.

No such luck.

Sesshomaru's head suddenly came up, the hand on his shoulder twitching. Golden eyes narrowed. "You are..."

Inuyasha hesitated, then sighed. "If I can't face my fear of you, I have no hope in Hell of facing that vicious bastard."

They stayed in silence for a while before Sesshomaru finally asked the question that had been burning in his mind.

"Why do you fear me? You've defeated me twice," he spoke dispassionately but saw Inuyasha's nose twitch at the shame that surely filled his scent.

Inuyasha ignored the scent of shame – he'd always figured it had wounded the pure demon's pride to lose to a half-breed. "C'mon, we both know I got lucky both of those times. You were solidly kicking my ass beforehand on both counts. You've defeated me, too."

He met his brother's eyes and spoke firmly. "If we faced each other both in good shape, without our swords, you know you'd defeat me. Like, it wouldn't even be a fight."

He sighed and averted his eyes as he continued softly. "You're vicious and you've sworn to kill me. You hurt me every time you get a chance, at least until recently. What more reason do I need to fear you?"

There was no reply, though the hand on his shoulder slowly pulled away.

Inuyasha felt a shaft of regret pass through him at the loss. "I'm working on it, though. I mean, it's not like I've ever _wanted_ to be afraid of you."

"And fighting with swords we're a near even match," Sesshomaru sat down next to Inuyasha but didn't touch him again.

"You know...I always thought I had inherited father's weakness. What kind of demon loses to a...Naturally I should have the advantage. I thought I wasn't a true demon to lose to you. I never gave you credit for becoming as powerful as you did. Even when Jaken went to get you, before the panther war. Objectively I knew I wanted you leading the flank even though you'd be leading full demons but I looked at them as filth to be weaker than you." he shook his head slightly. "Perhaps I should have considered that we weren't filth demons but you were an exceptional hanyou."

Inuyasha stared at the demon for a full minute, not comprehending the words at first. "You...you had a place for me?"

Sesshomaru didn't respond, but Inuyasha was already sure of what he'd said. His ears were very sharp, after all. "Wow...ok. Y'know...I'm sorry I let you down back then. Jaken said you still won? Sent those cats running, according to him. You..." He trailed off, and the youkai glanced at him.

He blushed as he continued, "Well, you're really fierce when _we_ fight, so I was just thinking that you must've been fuckin' terrifying in an actual war."

Realising how absolutely asinine he must sound, Inuyasha cleared his throat and verbally retreated. "Y'know, when I suggested sparring, I didn't really mean it as having to do with my demon. I was hoping maybe I could learn from you."

Well, that sounded just as stupid as his previous comment!

He rested his face in his hands and groaned.

"Forget it I didn't expect you to come," Sesshomaru's words were tight, "Jaken is an idiot."

That the imp had made that hell into some sort glorious victory sickened him.

Inuyasha's head came up when he heard the tightness in the youkai's voice. Instinct and experience told him to tread carefully, and he didn't realize his ears were tilting back in caution.

"As for sparring I have no objections." Sesshomaru said trying to change the topic, though he would have to discuss it soon enough if things went according to plan.

Recognizing a subject change when he heard one, Inuyasha nodded. "Ok sounds good. I'm looking forward to it, actually."

Hoping to lighten the older male's mood, he smiled. "Well, as long as you remember that we're sparring and not actually fighting."

There was no outward reaction, but the heaviness in the air seemed to lift a bit. Well, that was progress.

"Hey, uhh..you wanna go watch Rin's lesson?"

"I will be there in a while I need to hunt," hopefully he would work up an appetite in doing so. Either way he was no use to Rin like this unless something needed to be massacred. "Get some rest, tomorrow will be unpleasant."

Inuyasha nodded; though the heaviness had lifted, he could still sense the youkai's tension. "I will."

XxXx

Sesshomaru's senses thrummed just before dawn.

Recognizing the scent, he didn't move. The other presence didn't move, either. Finally, he slitted one eye open to see Inuyasha crouched just a bit out of reach, silently watching him, expectant.

The pup was somehow managing to look terrified, excited, and determined all at once.

Sesshomaru saw the hanyou tilt his head, and the velvety ears swiveled to face him. Inuyasha whispered. "Your breathing changed - I know you're awake."

He wondered if his brother realized just how strange this behavior was. "The sun is not nearly as awake as you are."

Inuyasha nodded. "Yeah, but...I don't want anyone following us."

That perked Sesshomaru's ears up and he came fully awake. Then he remembered, right their pack might be in danger if things went wrong. He rose and was soon moving through the forest to a large clearing with Inuyasha at his heels, bouncing impatiently.

"Okay so you said you wanted to spar. With swords or natural?" Natural meaning with fang and claw in demon parlance. God Inuyasha smelled so excited. "You can't face the demon that eager."

Inuyasha nodded, feeling as if he had simply been reminded, not chastised. "Ok, I gotcha. Yeah you said I need to be calm. Probably don't need to face _you_ too excited, either. And natural - we ain't fought without the swords in a while."

He took a couple deep breaths and shook himself out. A couple of bounces on the balls of his feet to expend some energy, then a long breath out. "Better?"

Sesshomaru gave a small nod, and Inuyasha balanced on the balls of his feet, a technique that would enable him to launch himself in any direction.

When he didn't immediately charge his 'opponent', he sensed curiosity and smiled. "Rin wasn't the only one training while you were gone. This dog has learned a couple new tricks."

Sesshomaru was intrigue, so the pup was maturing after all? There should probably be some sort of feast day for that. He stood where he was and tried to look as condescending as possible knowing how much it irritated Inuyasha, hoping to goad him into the first move.

Inuyasha almost sprang forward at that fucking look on Sesshomaru's face. In fact, he'd made it two steps closer before remembering one of Sango's lessons.

"Oohh you're trying to get me to make the first move and open myself up!" he smirked, realizing he hadn't seen that smug, conceited look on his brother's face in a while.

He circled to the side, going around towards Sesshomaru's right. The left would be too obvious, and he was sure many enemies currently burned in Hell that hadn't realized the possible trap.

He stayed light on his feet, breathing as evenly as possible. _Not too eager...wait..._ He sensed the youkai's interest in his actions, bright golden eyes watched him appraisingly.

He made sure not to give his intentions away as with a soft exhale, he shot forward, aiming for Sesshomaru's knees. Of course the demon dodged, but as Inuyasha landed, he planted one foot and sprang after the retreating figure.

He swiped with one hand, missing by a few inches, but used the momentum to flip forward. His hands touched the ground and he shoved off, aiming both feet for his 'teacher's gut.

Again, Sesshomaru evaded skillfully, but Inuyasha kept going, using his momentum to end up lightly on his feet, then springing to the left as his opponent went that way.

Sesshomaru changed direction again, but Inuyasha dropped his left hand and foot to the ground, abruptly changing his own angle to follow.

So close...

He launched himself low on all fours and snapped his fangs, then leapt back several paces. With Sesshomaru watching, he grinned and pulled a clump of soft white fur from his fangs, holding it up.

In their very first spar, Inuyasha had drawn first 'blood' by successfully biting the end of the fluff.

Sesshomaru looked down at his fluff in surprise, then back at him. Inuyasha realized his brother almost looked like he was considering smiling as he murmured, "New tricks, indeed."

He waited to see if Inuyasha would attack again but he seemed content and chewed the bit of fluff in a playful taunt. Sesshomaru shrugged mentally, well if Inuyasha wanted to 'take turns'… He feigned a leap forward and as Inuyasha dodged, launched himself for where the younger combatant would land and slashed his claws down right to left. Inuyasha leaped back wide-eyed as soon as he landed and the claws only tracked faint bloody scratches from shoulder to chest bone.

Sesshomaru pressed his advantage and stabbed his claws going a quarter inch into Inuyasha'a stomach as he dodged back again with a gasp. Sesshomaru broke off and began circling right, wary of being set up by getting over aggressive with the apparently retreating hanyou.

Inuyasha narrowed his eyes at the demon. Ok, so...serious sparring it was.

Ignoring a tiny voice that howled inside him, he muttered, "Remember you told me to use my anger over my memories, and find a target? Well, congratu-fuckin-lations, big brother; you just became my target."

He barely remembered to stay calm as he circled to his own right, not letting his dangerous youkai get too far to his side. He lightened his step, feeling blood running down his body.

He felt a faint pulse, and froze, keeping his eyes on Sesshomaru. No, they might be getting serious, but it was still sparring. His life wasn't in danger.

_**Threat.**_ He flinched at the rough voice in his head, not realizing he spoke out loud. "No, he's not!"

The scent of his own blood taunted him, and he didn't notice his hand wrap around Tetsusaiga's hilt.

Things were starting to get fuzzy.

No! He was holding Tets- he felt his hand slacking on the hilt, he tried to tighten his grip and muscles cramped, straining. This close, he could smell his enemy's blood just under pale skin.

"Stay calm, Inuyasha. You are the Alpha, not him."

_I'm in control._

_**Not yet, you're not. **__**Let go**_**. **Inuyasha's hand fell from the sword.

"Sesshomaru, get away!"

Sesshomaru ignored the order this was _why_ he was there after all. The demon wasn't tired yet, that was bad, Inuyasha's chances would go down sharply if it manifested too soon.

"Inuyasha calm down," he said levelly. "Sniff, do you smell any danger, any aggression?"

Inuyasha didn't respond. Okay. Tetsusaiga was supposed to control the demon right. Sesshomaru seized the hilt and drew ignoring the pain as it flow through his hand and sent little jolts up the nerves of his arm.

Inuyasha roared, an inhuman sound and dug his claws into Sesshomaru's shoulders. Thankfully Inuyasha's demon version was as mindless as when he'd tested Tokijin on it. If it'd gone for his eyes or throat he would have been forced to retreat. He pressed the blade flat against Inuyasha's chest, giving it as much contact area as he could, helped by Inuyasha's own aggression.

Inuyasha leaned into the attack, his head straining forward, fangs snapping in an effort to reach the enemy's throat. Sesshomaru held his ground, the nerves in hand mostly dead to the pain by then and let Inuyasha put his full weight against the sword.

"There's no threat Inuyasha. Everything's ok."

Inuyasha felt like he was falling, drowning. He couldn't stop it, couldn't regain control. He clawed desperately, seeking purchase, but to no avail.

Then he heard it. That voice.

That voice that had always, _always_ been so hateful in the past...it was calling to him.

_I'm here, aniki._

X

Sesshomaru grunted as the claws twitched and dug in his shoulders. He could no longer feel his hand, but managed to keep hold of the blade as he kept talking, "Calm down, Inuyasha. You can do this."

Then he felt the weight pressing against the sword shift. He braced himself, ready to pull away if he needed to, in spite of the claws in his shoulders.

Then he noticed the blood-red eyes. The bright blue centers were...flickering? A rumbling growl vibrated the air around them, and Sesshomaru had to force himself not to growl back at the challenge.

"Calm, Inuyasha. Focus. Come on, little brother."

The blue irises flickered more rapidly, revealing a hint of gold as a velvety ear flicked towards him.

"Remember, why you're doing this," he said softly when a little intelligence flickered in the eyes.

"We need to protect the others right?" at that point he was just saying anything that might get through. If he had to actually hurt Inuyasha or knock him out it would ruin their progress.

Inuyasha's eyes flicked gold, _"We?"_

_What? That's_ part he's paying attention to? Sesshomaru wondered incredulous. Pain flared as Inuyasha claws twitched inside his shoulder again and he suppressed a growl, anger wouldn't help. "Yeah, Inu-pup 'we'."

Inuyasha sagged against him as his scent faded to hanyou. Since he hadn't pulled his claws out it made for an awkward sort of embrace. Sesshomaru breathed deep of the human in his scent and decided it didn't smell half as terrible as he recalled. It occurred to him that he could drop the sword now and did so, well tried he couldn't seem to open his hand, he was breathing heavily almost panting.

Inuyasha gasped softly, "Sorry I..." Sesshomaru grunted as Inuyasha pulled the claws free and stepped back.

"Focus, the fight's not over," Sesshomaru said using his teeth to start, prying his hand off the sword hilt.

Inuyasha watched in horror as Sesshomaru started using his fangs to dislodge his hand, looking for all the world like an animal trying to get its paw out of a trap.

He wanted to help but sensed it wouldn't be welcome.

Finally, Tetsusaiga fell to the ground, revealing that the inside of Sesshomaru's hand was burned black. Inuyasha felt his heart seize with pain. This was his brother's reward for trying to help him.

X

Sesshomaru saw that the younger male looked stricken as he stared at his hand, and spoke as softly as he could manage, "Don't look like that; I'll be able to heal this and my shoulders by tomorrow."

Inuyasha visibly swallowed, but nodded. "You said the fight's not over?"

"No, you still need to finish tiring the demon out, though that shouldn't take much," Inuyasha looked dead on his feet, his shoulders slumped, panting for breath. "Then you must call the demon to you. If the demon is trying to assert itself you've already lost. It has to manifest by choice on your part. Lastly you must dominate it."

Inuyasha turned ghost white.

"Inuyasha, should you lose you would be a threat. Not just to me but to those 'innocents' you seem to value so," his voice was quiet and hard as a blade.

"I would rather die than hurt an innocent person again," Inuyasha replied firmly. Sesshomaru nodded and hardened his heart to what he might have to do, for the good of the pack.

He slowly backed away, watching Inuyasha's eyes, "Again."

Inuyasha gave a slight nod, then leapt. The younger male's trajectory was off - he would miss.

Then Inuyasha hit a tree with his feet, launching straight at his side.

Having not quite been expecting this maneuver, Sesshomaru lifted his hand to deflect the hanyou. But there was too much force, and his wounded hand was not quite up to the task. Most of Inuyasha's weight hit him full-on.

His brother's claws sank into his armor, then the weight shifted as Inuyasha flung himself towards his back, grabbing the arch of spiked steel that guarded his left shoulder.

Sesshomaru was pulled off-balance, and his eyes widened at the unfamiliar sensation. He swept his claws at Inuyasha, but the hanyou pulled further behind him. He felt a knee strike his lower back, and found himself simultaneously annoyed and impressed.

But he'd been defeating enemies for centuries before Inuyasha was even born.

Inuyasha rose and thrilled a little see the surprise in his brother's eyes. The feeling quickly faded.

"Your hand's really fucked huh?"

"It's nothing. I'm simply not used to you being able to strategize," it didn't surprise him that he felt no actual heat, shame but no anger. What once would have been intended as a vicious taunt was now merely playful.

He'd grown up with his father ensuring that his trainers 'didn't go easy' and a slew of demons happy to take their grievances against his father out on a target they _might_ be able to beat. This was nothing new, it'd just been a while He let his whip extend, letting Inuyasha see it so he wouldn't be caught off guard by the change and smiled a you'll-die-today smile.

Inuyasha watched the acidic whip flow out of Sesshomaru's hand, wary. But even as he readied himself, he smiled at the playful half-compliment. "If you can use that thing, I guess your hand really _will _be fine, huh?"

He evaded neatly as the whip lashed out and cracked close to one of his ears. No _way_ was that happening! He laid his ears down protectively, the tender insides flat against his hair.

The whip came again, coiling through the air. Struck by a thought, Inuyasha wrapped his hand in the fire-rat sleeve and grabbed the sinuous weapon, planting both feet as firmly as he could with his clawed toes digging into the ground.

Sesshomaru hissed in surprise, he had to admit no one had tried _that_ before. He leaped forward letting the force of Inuyasha's pulling add to his momentum. Inuyasha's eyes widened in surprise and he tried to meet him with claws. At the last moment Sesshomaru snapped his arm out to side taking the whip and Inuyasha arm with it, effectively breaking the guard. He slammed into Inuyasha meeting claws with his shoulder guard, struck Inyasha's chest and bore him down. He pulled his entangled arm back and froze, claws dripping poison over Inuyasha throat. _My win._

Inuyasha had begun to struggle under his opponent, when a snarl drew his attention to the glowing hand hovering over his throat and the promise of death in his brother's golden eyes.

"Se-Sesshomaru?" he whispered, ears laying back in fear. The youkai had already frozen, the all-too-familiar expression fading.

But the hand didn't pull away, and a moment later, a drop of poison landed right on Inuyasha's throat. He howled at the pain, unable to lick the stinging spot to soothe it. He barely registered surprise in Sesshomaru's eyes and scent.

A pulse vibrated his body, and he stiffened, struggling to stay calm and hang on.

To his shock, he felt his cheeks tingle and pressure in his eyes. For the first time, he actually _felt_ the transformation, rather than just sensing it.

Desperate to ignore the fact that the only other time he'd had this sensation was during his nightmare, he watched his brother as he growled in a rough voice he didn't recognise as his own, **"Don't let me up."**

Sesshomaru instantly snapped into a real-battle mindset, it wasn't much of a leap and nodded.

"I won't." then he set about trying to figure out how to accomplish that with his one arm tangled and the fact that his hand probably wouldn't be able to close, even if he could reach Tokijin at such an awkward angle.

He cast about for an idea and felt more than heard Inuyasha growl low as his scent changed to match his eyes. Out of time. He bit through his own whip and suppressed a scream of pain as he inadvertently tore it from the base. No matter it would grow back in a month or two. He drove his now free hand into Inuyasha's chest hard enough to wind him and heard a couple of ribs crack, okay maybe he hit a bit too hard. He saw the eyes flash gold.

"Fight it Inu-pup. It's not time yet."

He wasn't used to feeling helpless but he had also never been weaponless before and now he had his fangs and one barely functional set of claws that may or may not be able to hold a sword. He bared his fangs over Inuyasha's throat ready to use if necessary and stomped on the fear he felt. Inuyasha's irises flashed gold again his demon scent fading slightly before reversing.

That gave Sesshomaru an idea, if he had the time, if it didn't accidentally kill Inuyasha. He called up his demon, fighting to stay in position through the transformation as he entered his true form and his hand grew into a monstrous blackened paw. He struggled not to crush Inuyasha while still keeping him under control.

Inuyasha's consciousness of the situation came in flashes, and each time, the flash lasted a little longer, while the blank darkness between seemed to shorten.

He was thrashing and flailing under his brother's massive paw.

Sesshomaru was clearly trying to keep him pinned, while not crushing him.

Then a flash came that didn't end. His cheeks were sensitive like they'd been sunburned, and everything seemed to appear in greater detail than usual. Smells were almost overwhelming, while the sun seemed brighter. He felt long fangs brushing almost to his chin.

Hopeful but cautious, he stopped struggling. He lay for several minutes without speaking, his eyes roving their overly-detailed surroundings. He slowly flexed his hands, feeling the slight weight difference of longer claws.

He lifted one hand to look; longer than Sesshomaru's, the slightly curved weapons still bore the youkai's blood from earlier. He had a fleeting urge to lick it off, but the last thing he needed to do right now was tempt his demon any further.

He looked up at the demon pinning him.

**"Sesshomaru?"** he asked, his voice rough and double-timbred.

The huge dog tilted his head, then a flare of pink-and-white light surrounded them. Inuyasha blinked to see his brother, still carefully holding him down. There was a slight curious frown on the fine features as Sesshomaru asked, "Do you know who you are?"

Inuyasha smiled, which felt somewhat odd with the lengthened fangs. He must look fearsome indeed if his 'teacher' need clarification of his mental state, **"I am Inuyasha. I am a hanyou, Izayoi was my human mother, InuTaisho was my demon father. You're my older brother, Sesshomaru, but you're a real demon."**

Sesshomaru nodded approvingly, but didn't move to let him up, "Our pack, Inu-pup. Tell me about the ones we protect."

Inuyasha ran off the required information but was now seriously beginning to question _his own_ mental state because he could have sworn Sesshomaru had just called him 'Inu-pup'.

"Good. Can you transform back?"

Inuyasha thought about his hanyou form and reverted easily. Sesshomaru rose and stepped back.

"Wow!" Inuyasha gasped happily.

Sesshomaru looked uncertain.

"What is it?"

"This...is not supposed to be able to happen. I'm...not entirely sure how to proceed."

"What do you mean?"

"Until you master your demon, if the demon comes without being called it is always supposed to win," Sesshomaru took a slow breath and Inuyasha noticed that his eyes looked dull. "Maybe somehow you mastered it this way but it's also possible that you haven't."

He met Inuyasha's eyes, "If you are ready, now would be the time to call it forth and see. Expect a fight, at worst you won't have one and you'll be in perfect control."

Sesshomaru stepped back and waited, Inuyasha's eyes landed on the wounded hand grasping Tokijin's hilt and saw it was shaking slightly, he averted his gaze shocked and saw the length of poison whip wrapped around his own arm. What the hell had happened.

"I'm ready...but if you aren't..."

"Do you want to do this again from the start? I'm ready." _Win. Don't make me kill you._

Inuyasha hesitated, but Sesshomaru was beginning to look impatient.

He took a deep breath and focused. An exhausted wave rolled through him, but again, he felt his cheeks tingle and everything went blurry for a moment before shifting into sharp detail.

He felt a brief waver in his energy but it soon settled. He focused on his breathing for a few moments, then looked up to Sesshomaru, seeking approval.

**"Yeah?"** he asked in that unsettling rough voice.

The youkai gazed at him for a few seconds before nodding and giving a ghost of a smile. "Yeah."

Inuyasha smiled, tentatively licking at his lengthened fangs. **"Uhh, this is gonna sound stupid, but...what do I look like?"**

Sesshomaru inclined his head towards a stream that flowed nearby, watching as his transformed brother walked over to look at the surface of the water.

Inuyasha recoiled at first, then lifted a hand to his cheek stripes, the marks of a demon. **"No wonder people are scared of me - just look at me."**

Sesshomaru sighed. "We will need to practice this, you are aware? We will continue with your meditations and practising shifting. We need to make sure that no situation can arise where you lose control."

Inuyasha raised those glowing red and amber eyes to his. **"'We'?"**

Remembering how the younger male had reacted to the inclusive word before, he nodded, "Yes, Inu-pup, 'we'. We have a pack to protect."

Inuyasha grinned. **"Yeah we do,"** he replied more than a little choked up.


	5. Making Good on the Deal

5: Making Good on the Deal

Check out our pack, and welcome to our newest kit, RenjiMichaelisMustang!

Warnings: Language, recounting of violence, feels, and if the headhopping hadn't bothered you yet, I doubt it will now lol

* * *

_Inuyasha grinned. **"Yeah we do,"** he replied more than a little choked up._

That grin created a fearsome effect in the pup's new form. In his current weakened condition Sesshomaru was glad they were on the same side. That being said, he was proud that the pup had succeeded and happy with his own involvement, though the pup likely would have managed on his own anyway. That will and determination had compensated for a lack of knowledge and skill for a long time.

He was beginning to appreciate that, there would be more sparring in the future. Not to kill time or take out aggression but to genuinely get better practicing against one of the few opponents who could give him a fight. It had been a while and if their previous match was any indicator he'd become far too complacent.

Inuyasha shifted back into his regular form and saw in the stream that he still bore the lightning bolt demon marks. He sighed, happy, exhausted, and with a sort of numb thrill he was too tired to really enjoy. He knelt to drink and as he brought the water to his mouth, noticed again the bit of whip. He pulled if off his arm, creepy fucking thing. Gods, he looked over at Sesshomaru with a wave of guilt and wondered if the demon still would have helped if he'd known how much damage he would take. Holy shit was he actually worried about his brother?

"Spare me your pity," Sesshomaru said and for a brief moment Inuyasha saw pain in the dull eyes. "It's done, enjoy your victory." He walked down the bank away from Inuyasha.

He hesitated, wondering if it'd be better to just let the wounded youkai be. But guilt and a desire for things to be better than the past surged through him.

Deciding he'd back off the moment the older canine showed any aggression, he ran to catch up. "I don't pity you; that'd be stupid and pointless. I just feel a little guilty that you got hurt because of me."

Sesshomaru kept walking, "I'd think it would please you."

Inuyasha made a little choked sound of indignation and was about to retort before he realized that a short time ago it would have been true, "Maybe once but you were helping me, of course I'm gonna feel guilty."

He decided he'd take the lack of response as acceptance.

He glanced over into the creek to admire his reflection with the faint, jagged marks. While not as dark as in his demon form, they were still striking. He smoothed his hair back to try to expose as much of them as possible.

"Don't be so vain, pup." Just as he registered the words, a hand pushed between his shoulder blades, and he stumbled into the stream.

He quickly scrambled back out of the cool water, shaking himself. "What the-!" he sputtered indignantly, only to shut up when he saw Sesshomaru's face.

His regal brother was wearing a slight smile, a soft 'Hmm hmm," sound coming from him.

Inuyasha gaped like a fish. "Are...are you _laughing_?!"

Sesshomaru turned in the direction of camp. "Come, Inuyasha. I am sure you wish to share the good news with our pack."

He headed back for the camp, jaw clenched. Shoving Inuyasha had been a mistake, an amusing mistake granted, but pain seared anew from the torn whip up his arm. Nothing for it until he could get away from Inuyasha. Speaking of he still had to make good on their deal, maybe Inuyasha would forget?

"Hey Kagome! I can control my demon!" Inuyasha shouted. Kagome cheered and ran to embrace him as the others gathered around.

"Subtle," Sesshomaru said, voice pitched for demon ears and Inuyasha reddened a little.

"Was it bad, are you okay?" Kagome gushed examining Inuyasha's new marks while Sango and Miroku slapped him on the back and offered congratulations.

"Sesshomaru-sa..."

"Quiet," Sesshomaru said and Jaken fell silent, whimpering with the urge to speak whatever inanity had been on the tip of his tongue. Rin smiled, it occurred to him that now she didn't have to worry, the pack would look out for her if anything happened to him. He felt something brush the back of his hand and looked down to see Rin licking the blackened flesh, her hair had touched the healthy skin.

"That doesn't work with humans," he said quietly, pulling away. She must have been trying to copy his actions from when they'd met.

Rin looked up at him with worry in those big eyes. "Then what _can_ I do?"

Her question caught the attention of the others, and the scent of concern practically flooded the air as his injuries were noticed.

"What happened?" "What's wrong with your hand?" "Do you need help?"  
Then one that really caught his attention - "Inuyasha, what'd you do?!"

Not too long ago, the thought of humans being concerned for his welfare would have been equal parts laughable and disgusting. Now, though, he sensed that the questions came from a place of care, and...maybe...that wasn't such a bad thing.

"Inuyasha did no wrong. I got these wounds helping him control the beast within him."

The scent of concern became tinged with admiration, and Sango stepped forward. "I'm sure you don't need any help, but I have knowledge in demon healing?"

He inclined his head. "No. I shall heal fine on my own." Seeing a slight wince, he added, "But I...appreciate the offer."

Inuyasha disentangled himself from his friends to come closer, a trace of guilt left in his eyes and scent. "Ok, you do what you need to. If you want, Rin, Jaken, and Ah-Un can stay with us while you go..." The pup made a vague gesture with his hand. "...and do whatever to heal up."

Kagome turned to the hanyou. "You can't just kick him out when he's hurt! Especially not when he was hurt helping you!"

Inuyasha's jaw dropped. "Hey! He prefers to be alone sometimes! I ain't _making_ him leave!"

His brother looked back up at him. "Uhhh ok, you ain't gotta leave, but it's cool if you want to."

Then stuck his tongue out at Kagome. "Better?"

Sesshomaru looked Kagome dead in the eyes, "You are very _human_. If you travel with a demon," he gestured at Inuyasha "you should at least attempt to understand them."

"Rin."

Rin trotted along after him still worried.

Kagome wheeled on Inuyasha, "Are you really going to let him talk to me like that?"

Inuyasha was staring slackjawed, "Did he just call me a demon?"

XxXx

Rin followed Sesshomaru back to the stream.

"You don't need to do anything," he reassured her as he settled with his back against a maple. She was still frowning and smelled of worry. He felt a flicker of anger at himself for being so weak "It will heal like last time and the whip, isn't like my arm it will regrow."

Rin nodded and gave a tremulous smile. He wrapped his arm in such a way that he could lick his hand and still hold her. The pain slowly faded as Rin dozed contentedly.

Inuyasha was still a bit shell-shocked by being called a demon, but Sango had heard Kagome's indignant question. "His point is valid, even if he said it harshly. Understanding demons is essential when you travel with them."

Inuyasha wasn't listening. He had slipped away while the women talked, following the direction Sesshomaru had gone. He found himself in a tree, still far enough away that he couldn't even smell his brother and the human.

But he could see them. Between the trees, he saw Sesshomaru sitting with his arm around Rin.

He got comfortable on his branch and surveyed the area, watching over them as the youkai healed and rested.

Inuyasha watched in silence as Sesshomaru licked his wound. He'd never seen the demon do it before and was struck by how it was no different from what he would have done.

After a little while, Sesshomaru leaned his head back against the tree, eyes half-open. He looked completely_ done_.

Inuyasha noticed that the sun was setting, and only then realized it had taken them _all day_ to learn to control his demon.

Remembering that Sesshomaru had said they'd continue with meditation, he decided there was no harm in practising on his own. His teacher might even be impressed if he got better at it!

XxXx

Sesshomaru suppressed a smile when he caught a whiff of Inuyasha. The younger male was likely keeping just out of scent range, hoping not to be noticed. But Sesshomaru's senses were sharper.

Unconsciously, he relaxed further, allowing his eyes to close. As he began to drift off, a thought passed through his mind. Shouldn't it be odd that he felt secure enough to doze, knowing that his brother was watching over him and Rin?

Inuyasha, feeling a bit more confident with Sesshomaru asleep, sank into his meditation, thinking about all the times he'd felt inferior to his brother. Those memories were easy to deal with today, still riding high as he was from besting his demon.

XxXx

The sun was just peeking over the distant mountains when Sesshomaru awakened. Rin was still curled up to his side, shivering slightly. With a frown, he brushed the cool dew from her fire-rat robe and hair.

Wrapping his fluff around her, he rose and wandered into the woods a bit, following the calm scent of hanyou. There was Inuyasha, in a tree, clearly meditating. _'He meditated all night?_'

Not wanting to disturb the younger male, he turned away, but Inuyasha called out to him. Clearly, he'd still been aware while meditating.

"Hey, Sesshomaru?"

He paused and glanced up over his shoulder. Inuyasha fidgeted a bit, then blurted, "You said to 'enjoy' my victory? Umm, how do demons celebrate?"

"However you wish; raping the vanquished is common, I once knew a viper demon who would set fire to the village he conquered and cook the battle dead for food, father would hold grand feasts for the minor lords. There aren't any rules, that's the point."

He watched as Inuyasha tilted his head, velvety ears twitching thoughtfully. "A feast sounds good. I mean, I don't really have anyone to invite - everyone's already here. Umm...we could go hunting? And bring back lots of prey so the pack can feast."

Sesshomaru nodded and disappeared to hunt, trying to figure out he would go about doing so. Poison claws perhaps, that would only need a quick strike, his specialty, no need for strength. That would work though he'd have to use his superior speed to its fullest if he wanted any shot at beating Inuyasha in his current state, normally his whip's ability to fell multiple animals with precision made hunting games non-contests.

Inuyasha was eying a magnificent buck, preparing to pounce. But his mind, which should've been on the hunt, was instead centered on his brother.

Sesshomaru had taken quite a bit of damage to help him.

He really ought to find a way to pay him back.

Sesshomaru breathed hard as he sprinted toward a final deer. It was almost sunset, the traditional end for a daylight hunting game. He leaped, the deer spooked and he twisted to drive dripping claws into its throat. He felt a shock run up his arm as the damaged muscles failed to pull his claws free and trotted a few steps until the poison took and the deer fell.

He yanked his claws out in disgust and took it back to the pile he'd gathered—two birds, five deer, a boar, a dozen small rabbits—impressive for a minor lord, serviceable for himself but he wasn't pleased. He had never really been concerned with his missing arm, Tetsusaiga had occupied him while he adjusted, driven him. However the sheer liability of having a single main weapon was now quite apparent. As good as he was, relying solely on his ability to avoid damage to one limb wasn't going to work forever.

"Heh that not's bad," Inuyasha teased as he joined with his own collection. Sesshomaru ignored him simply because that was his way and it would annoy Inu-pup. "Uh...did you use poison?" Inuyasha asked sniffing.

"You find that unfair?"

"No it's just...they're humans, they can't eat this." Sesshomaru closed his eyes a moment. Rin gathered her own food - fish, fruit and such, he'd never had to consider how to hunt for humans.

Inuyasha bit his lip as a scent similar to frustrated shame reached him. Sesshomaru stood there, looking like he couldn't care less about this.

But his scent was telling.

Inuyasha spoke quietly. "It's fine, though. You, me, Shippo and Kirara can eat what you got; poison won't affect us like it would a human. The others can eat what I got. Besides, if we cook the meat, maybe that'll fry out some of the poison?"

The youkai gave a short nod, it took everything he had not to lash out at Inuyasha. He knew he was just trying to help, he'd probably been around humans too long to know better. It certainly _felt_ like Inuyasha was trying to rub his nose in it though.

He turned to eye their respective collections and the surroundings. "If you will start preparing our catches, I will go get the others, and we will camp here tonight."

He stalked through the woods and when he reached their previous camp, Rin came trotting up. She froze and Sango pulled her back, drawing Hiraikotsu.

"What?"

"Your eyes are red," Sango said, cautiously advancing on him. He hissed in frustration, Sango twitched, her scent filled with terror but to her credit held her ground.

Reining in his demon he let his eyes fade to gold, past experience with Inuyasha had obviously made them over cautious. "Come, Inuyasha has prepared you a feast."

By the time their pack had followed him to the glade where Inuyasha waited, he had calmed somewhat.

Somehow it calmed him further to see that Inuyasha had been busy during his absence; two bright fires burned, and their prey had been sorted out.

Shippo sniffed one of the piles of meat, and, to Sesshomaru's surprise, smiled brightly. "Father used to do this -if you eat meat with small amounts of poison, it'll build up your resistance to poison in general."

Sesshomaru wasn't sure how to respond, but Inuyasha answered casually. "Yeah, figured it'd be a good way to ward off other poisons."

Sesshomaru caught Inuyasha's eye and nodded his thanks, at least only one person knew his shame. The humans likely wouldn't know how much of a loss of control those reddened eyes had betrayed. To be safe Inuyasha had cooked their catches over separate fires and the brothers, Shippo, Jaken and Kirara ate at one while the humans took the other, though Rin eventually moved over to join them.

He found it surprisingly companionable.

Shippo tried to steal a piece of deer from Inuyasha.

"You little brat!" Inuyasha snapped while Shippo laughed.

"How dare you steal from your alpha you impudent..." Jaken began. Two pained yelps followed as Sesshomaru threw a rock at Jaken, at the same time Inuyasha smacked Shippo over the head.

Inuyasha saw the stone ping right off of the toad-imp's head and burst out laughing. Sesshomaru had moved so fast, he'd barely seen it.

Still laughing, he turned to grab more meat, missing the way golden eyes lingered on him, almost warm as they reflected the fire.

As everyone ate their fill and then some, content sighs were heard.

Inuyasha laid back, gazing up at the moon. As his thoughts roamed, he remembered his and his brother's deal - Sesshomaru had said he'd share his worst memory with him if he could control the demon inside him.

He glanced from the corner of his eye, thinking for a moment that Sesshomaru was looking at him. But clearly he was imagining shit; the youkai was gazing at the fire.

Did Sesshomaru even _have_ a worst memory? Inuyasha found himself doubtful - even as a little kid, he'd probably been frightful.

Inuyasha mentally shrugged and lifted his eyes back to the moon, debating on whether or not to mention the deal. After all, it wasn't like Sesshomaru had _promised_.

"What is it Inu-pup?" Sesshomaru asked quietly. Jaken made a strangled sound but Sesshomaru looked in his direction and he dove for cover, whatever was on his tongue remaining unsaid.

Inuyasha's ears flicked madly at the maybe-endearment, even though the rest of his body language was casual. "I was just wondering...do you remember our deal? About if I mastered my demon?"

He winced as he sensed the air get heavier just from Sesshomaru's aura. His demon blood pulsed softly at the challenge, but he easily reined it in.

"Yes."

He nodded, trying not to make his struggle to breathe under the oppressive energy obvious. Yeah, the older male was _not_ happy. "O-ok. I was just wondering if you remembered, that's all."

Sesshomaru rose and with a look, prevented Jaken, Shippo and Rin from following as he walked into the woods. He paused waiting, seemingly forever until Inuyasha got the message and followed. He could smell well-suppressed fear on the younger demon and felt old pleasure warring with guilt. He had to give the pup credit for hiding it as well as he did and a bit of pride on Inuyasha's behalf joined the mix.

After a long walk partially to get out of ear and nose range and partially to collect his thoughts he stopped by a stream. It was a lower portion of the one he had rested at the day before, cold and smelling of the mountains they were skirting.

Inuyasha looked up at him curiously then sat. That was surprising, it went against instinct to do so especially given Inuyasha's fear. Inuyasha was ceding both dominance and a physical advantage in a fight to make things easier for him. Sesshomaru looked at him, allowing his gratitude to show in his eyes before he faced the water again.

"Fifty years ago I engaged in battle against the panther tribe with almost two-hundred demons at my back, knowing that if I succeeded no one would ever question my lineage again. If I won I would be recognized as a true demon in my own right - it would be my final proof that I wasn't like father," he looked at the ground for a moment.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes despite his nervousness, really a glorious battle was his 'worst memory'? The demon who lived to seek power? He wondered if Sesshomaru really didn't have any bad memories as he'd suspected or if this was just meant to make him feel inferior. It wouldn't work - he may not have led a real army but he had his pack and they'd been in tons of battles.

Sesshomaru broke into his thoughts, picking up the story again, "I set up the strategy, I'd advance while my followers held the front. I tore through the enemy lines, that isn't arrogance, just fact - you can ask anyone who was there. I lost sight of the front over the course of the battle and when I returned," he paused swallowing, this was more difficult than he'd thought.

Inuyasha was confused, the story was of victory and yet the demon's scent held increasing stress and he was acting as though it were genuinely difficult to recount. Sesshomaru was too proud to put on even that small amount of weakness just for the sake of insulting him.

"I returned triumphant, victorious to find the line had broken, nearly three-quarters of my followers laid in pieces, if there were pieces left at all. The Panthers have a tendency to eat the battlefield dead," shame filled his scent but he couldn't do anything about that, "I did not...I didn't react the way a demon should."

He saw Inuyasha's curiosity and his hesitance to ask, it was fair he'd asked Inuyasha to delve his memories in depth and he found himself uncharacteristically _wanting_ to talk. The shame in his scent increased, he hadn't thought that was possible as he admitted, "Looking out on that battlefield, I stood victorious and yet...I wanted to cry."

Inuyasha was stunned by the quiet confession. He knew he had to tread more carefully than he ever had.

He stayed sitting, letting Sesshomaru have the advantageous dominant position. His mind raced, imagining how it must have hurt the older demon to lose ones that had followed him into battle.

And Jaken had been so boastful about this.

"Jaken really is an idiot," he muttered, then heard what sounded like a long, somewhat relieved sigh.

"Yes, he is."

Inuyasha glanced up at the youkai, feeling like he should acknowledge that this had been a big deal. "Hey, uhhh, Sesshomaru?"

The golden eyes lowered to his, and he swallowed, hoping he didn't say this wrong. "Umm, look, I just wanted to...to thank you for telling me."

He chuckled nervously. "If you were anyone else, I'd offer to be here anytime you wanted to talk, but I know you don't really need that, so...yeah."

Figuring he'd already made this as horrendously awkward as possible, he rose to his feet and brushed himself off, unconsciously keeping his head down. "So, uhh, you wanna go back to camp? Or are you just gonna hang out here for a while?"

Sesshomaru knew what Inuyasha was offering and appreciated his tact. He had definitely been expecting a worse reaction. So he ignored the question and partially out of appreciation, partially because it needed to be said for a variety of reasons, asked his own.

"You understand why I didn't want you anywhere near the panthers?" he made his voice as toneless as he could manage.

Inuyasha's ear twitched, and he stared at the demon for a few seconds. Then answered cautiously, hoping he was right. "Well, from what you said, it sounds like you didn't want me near them cause you ...might've been worried about me falling."

Before Sesshomaru could confirm or refute his words, he shook his head.

"Sorry, that was dumb of me," his voice was sad and his ears drooped. Why would his vicious brother ever be worried about him? Sesshomaru hated him. Well, maybe not anymore, but he'd definitely still hated him when they'd faced those cats.

Perhaps it was more that he'd been getting in the way of Sesshomaru's revenge? But for some reason, the thought of saying that out loud hurt.

Inuyasha was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't notice Sesshomaru watching him.

Sesshomaru nodded but realized that Inuyasha didn't see, the pup's scent reeked of grief and he was unsurprised to see pain in his eyes. Thinking a moment he reasoned that Inuyasha must have thought it had been a judgement on his abilities.

"I assure you Inu-pup it had nothing to do with your power. I brought only Jaken," he said as gently as he could. If only he'd done that the first time. The image of Inuyasha's bloody corpse being feasted on by panther-demons rose as it so often did when he dreamed of the battle. He forced it away, glancing from Inuyasha.

Inuyasha looked up at the soft assurance. Sesshomaru was looking away, scent tinged with something like worry.

Maybe he had been right the first time, and his brother_ had_ been concerned for him. The thought made him happy for some reason he couldn't pinpoint, and he found himself smiling.

"Alright, then. I'm good with that." He smiled brightly when the demon looked back to him, hoping to dispel the shade of darkness in his scent, "I dunno bout you, but I could eat some more. I think I'm gonna head back. Unless you had something else to say?"

Sesshomaru thought for a moment; on the one hand he didn't want to ask, on the other it had been a long day between the hunt and this discussion. His wounds, aggravated by the hunt were an annoyance and it wasn't like he had anything to lose at this point anyway Inuyasha had seen him humiliated in about every possible way in the last two days.

Anyway Inuyasha _had_ offered, in a sense.

"Dogs are social animals."

Inuyasha's ear twitched and he frowned in confusion, "You said that before."

Sesshomaru nodded and turned to look back out over the stream, his scent smelling solid and familiar again.

Inuyasha continued to frown, thinking. So dogs were social animals, so what? It wasn't like - _oh_!

Sesshomaru was a dog as well, so was he trying to say even _he_ had a social side?

Well, Inuyasha certainly didn't want to ruin that. Slowly, he sat back down, eyes, ears, and nose focused on his brother. Sesshomaru didn't seem to react to him staying at first. Then, after a long couple of minutes, the youkai took a deep breath and let it out as a sigh.

Slowly, Sesshomaru sat down next to him, somehow managing to make the action seem graceful, even with one arm.

Inuyasha made sure to stay quiet and still, not wanting to annoy the demon by fidgeting. They sat like that for some time, just watching the stream and the moon.  
As the memories played over in his mind Sesshomaru caught himself leaning slightly toward Inuyasha. He straightened, drew a shaky breath, and tried to turn his thoughts to something a little less...raw.

Inuyasha was shocked when he felt Sesshomaru lean a bit closer, but then the demon pulled away. Hearing the shaky breath, he frowned.

This was eating his brother up. Suddenly sure that the older canine wanted physical contact, but would probably not admit that under torture, Inuyasha took matters into his own hands.

He scooted closer and leaned against the taller male, laying his head on his shoulder.

He felt Sesshomaru stiffen a bit, but he stayed, determined to offer what he could.

What?...after everything he'd done to Inuyasha the pup was actually trying to help?! He felt guilty as hell, but he couldn't bring himself to pull away, he quite literally couldn't remember the last time anyone other than Rin had touched him outside of combat. Besides Jaken running into the back of his leg, and that didn't count.

He bowed his head and closed his eyes, willing himself to stop trembling.

Inuyasha's chest tightened when he felt his powerful brother trembling. Almost unconsciously, he lightly nuzzled Sesshomaru's shoulder, humming a soothing lullaby his mom had often sang to him.

Soon enough, the trembling lessened, and he felt the youkai lean his head against his own. He tried to keep his ears still, not wanting to fwap Sesshomaru in the face, though the mental image was amusing.

After a few moments when Sesshomaru had regained a measure of control he raised his head, "Forgive me, Inuyasha-youkai."

Inuyasha's heart swelled with pride at Sesshomaru's words. Was the older demon finally seeing him as something like an equal?

Then it occurred to him that if Sesshomaru was going to start calling him that...did that mean no more 'Inu-pup'? Cause he really liked that one.

"Thank you, but I think I like 'Inu-pup' more," he blurted, then flattened his ears in embarrassment. He hadn't really meant to say that out loud. _Baka!_

He cleared his throat and attempted to redirect the conversation. "Uhh, forgive you? For what?"

"This," Sesshomaru gestured at the general scene answering the last question first. "The other...was a term of submission...rest assured you'll still be Inu-pup," he allowed a hint of a vicious smile just to get things back on more familiar ground.

Inuyasha felt his ears twitch like crazy. A term of submission? His mind whirled for a second before he got a grip. It wasn't like Sesshomaru had come onto him. And he didn't want that to happen anyways, right?

"Perhaps I should educate you in demon culture," it was half playful taunt, half sincere offer.

The offer of a real demon education got Inuyasha's attention. "If you're willing to try and teach me, I'll do my best to be a good student."

Sesshomaru stood and took a step back, "Uh...then perhaps tomorrow? You...I've kept you long enough. Surely you wish to er return to your... pack."

The scent of Inuyasha need for his mate was almost overpowering, he hadn't meant to keep them apart, hadn't even realized Inuyasha _had_ a mate. He'd smelled nothing of the kind before, but then Inuyasha was rarely away from Kagome this long. It had to be Kagome - Sango and Miroku always seemed wrapped up in each other, so that only left the priestess.

Inuyasha was a bit puzzled by the apparent brush-off, but Sesshomaru _had _made several concessions tonight, so maybe he just wanted to be alone now that he'd been sufficiently comforted.

He stood as well. "Uhh sure, I can go back. But, y'know, I...I've really enjoyed tonight. Just...talking and not trying to kill each other? It's been nice. See ya later."

He turned and launched himself into the closest tree, cheeks burning.

It wasn't until he'd almost reached the camp that he noticed the desire, almost arousal in his own scent. _Oh gods!_

Sesshomaru was surprised by how disappointed Inuyasha sounded but he wasn't about to deal with it tonight. That had been...awkward.

It'd been a very long day so he stretched out against a nearby boulder to sleep, Rin would be safe in the camp. He could think everything through tomorrow. For tonight though, no more thinking, no more memories, maybe no nightmares.

Kagome saw Inuyasha come into camp like the hounds of hell were after him and tensed until she saw him slow down his face red as a blushing maid, ears twitching.

She approached cautiously, "Um...is everything ok? Did Sesshomaru upset you?"

Inuyasha shook his head, feeling incredibly awkward. He'd gotten turned on by Sesshomaru? Yeah, it didn't get any more awkward than that.

"I'm fine, Sesshomaru's fine, everything's just...peachy. It's getting late; you oughtta go to bed. Busy day tomorrow. Busy, busy."

Cutting off his inane rambling, he found himself a wide branch and got comfy. He watched as Kagome went and laid down, relieved she hadn't asked more questions.

He tried to sleep, but his thoughts and aching body hindered him. It was a long time before he fell asleep.


	6. Demon Education

(Still owning nothing)

6: Demon Education

Timewaster is brilliant, ne?

True but we all know you come for Sesh's lemon trees ;)

Warnings - headhopping as per usual for this fic lol.

* * *

Previously - _((Inuyasha shook his head, feeling incredibly awkward. He'd gotten turned on by Sesshomaru? Yeah, it didn't get any more awkward than that._

_"I'm fine, Sesshomaru's fine, everything's just...peachy. It's getting late; you oughtta go to bed. Busy day tomorrow. Busy, busy."_

_Cutting off his inane rambling, he found himself a wide branch and got comfy. He watched as Kagome went and laid down, relieved she hadn't asked more questions._

_He tried to sleep, but his thoughts and aching body hindered him. It was a long time before he fell asleep.))_

_._

Sesshomaru woke with the sun and immediately settled into meditation, yesterday had been an exercise in self-disgust and he needed to get some equilibrium back.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome called. He opened one eye sleepily.

"Eh?"

"Breakfast."

Inuyasha happily leaped down from his tree and dug in. His thoughts were torn between surreal happiness and good god that didn't actually happen pleasegod. He decided to focus on the first, it had been so strange to see Sesshomaru as anything but the consummate warrior. Okay that was a poor choice of words but...Of course on anyone else he would have said they were a little shaken up and forgotten about it, happened to everyone.

With Sesshomaru though...it was like if Miroku had started sobbing in his arms, fucking weird and he _apologized_ for it? That just made it weirder. Still it was awesome to actually feel kinship after everything they'd been through.

"There's a shard..." Kagome began when Koga came to a stop next to her in a cloud of dust.

Inuyasha started to snarl out of habit, but before Kagome could even send him a warning glare, his snarl faded. For some reason, he didn't feel the usual heat at the thought of Koga's presence. He shrugged and kept eating.

Koga took Kagome's hands, "Kagura came this way have you seen her? Don't worry if Naraku is close I'll protect you!"

Sango felt herself tense remembering her last encounter with the monster's wasps. It had almost been her _las_t encounter and even a slayer couldn't just brush that off, as much as she had tried.

Ignoring the flirty wolf, Inuyasha's head came up as he zero'd in on Sango's scent. She was getting wound up, likely from the thought of facing Naraku's Hell-bugs again.

Abandoning his food, he went to Sango's side. "Hey, you ok?" he asked in a low voice. The slayer started to nod, then hesitated and shook her head.

"Last time...I..." She trailed off, clearly unable to express herself at the moment.

Inuyasha nodded. "I know, but you learned from that fight. Next time will be different."

"Indeed."

They both looked up as Sesshomaru entered the camp only a few trees away. The youkai looked as composed and refined as ever, and Inuyasha felt his heart quicken. _Oh my god, stop that!_

Luckily, his brother seemed to be focused on Sango. "As he said, you learned. You will not allow yourself to be poisoned like that again, will you?"

Sango practically stood at attention. "No, I won't!"

Inuyasha hid a smile. "Y'know, before we go off hunting, maybe we should swing back by Jinenji's place for some more antidote? Just in case."

"Good idea," Sango said a little sheepishly.

"You are returning to the hunt?"

"Yeah figured it's about time," Inuyasha replied, smiling fiercely.

Sesshomaru turned abruptly and walked away a bit before halting, "I must attend to something but when I return, we'll have that discussion we spoke of."

Inuyasha's smile grew - in spite of last night's awkwardness, Sesshomaru still planned to educate him on demon culture.

He wanted to know what his brother had to 'attend to', but refrained from asking. If Sesshomaru had wanted him to know, he would've told him.

He tried to ignore the feeling of loss as the tall youkai vanished into the trees.

XxXx

Four days later as the pack ate lunch in some low hill land Inuyasha caught a scent on the air. Sesshomaru and blood, his and several other demons. Fear filled him and he rushed to meet the wounded youkai only to find him walking calmly into camp.

The older demon wore a piece of black and red armor with a vicious looking three inch spike like a dew claw on each ankle and his black boots had been cut back to reveal long claws tinged green with poison. Inuyasha stared as he walked by and Rin ran up.

"Sesshomaru-sama can I show you what I've learned?" he nodded and she began showing off her new techniques beginning with some basic sutras.

Inuyasha continued to stare at Sesshomaru, as he calmly observed Rin's demonstration.

As she finished, Sesshomaru gave an approving nod, "Well done. Continue learning as much as you can."

The human beamed and ran back to her archery lesson.

Inuyasha pitched his voice low to avoid being overheard. "You alright? What were you doing out there?"

When he didn't get a response right away, he switched topics. "So...you said you'd teach me about demon culture?"

Sesshomaru nodded, hesitant to talk about his personal quest. It must have been obvious enough and he didn't see any direction the conversation could go that wouldn't reveal more insecurities than he cared to speak openly.

They walked a short distance away to avoid interruptions.

"What do you know and what do you need to know?"

Inuyasha blinked at the question. "I was never educated about it properly. Mother told me what she could, but...that involved talking about Father, and she would cry whenever she talked about him."

He cleared his throat. "So I don't know much at all, really. I was hoping you would just teach me whatever a new demon needs to know."

Sesshomaru's amber eyes narrowed in contemplation.

"Well first there are honorifics that don't exist among humans. I already explained -youkai, the important thing about that is that it can be used toward any demon regardless of other rank or status. There is also name-tribe so for example if you had just met Shippo and he saved your inept self in battle, you might call him Shippo-Inuyokai meaning even though he's a fox demon you accept him as a part of your tribe. Lastly there is -Roiyarubeta or informally -Roibeta used for a highly valued demon who you are dominant over."

Inuyasha seemed to still be paying attention so he continued, "In a formal setting you always begin eating in hierarchical order - not doing so _will_ start a fight at least among canine demons. Never go into demon form or let your fangs show. If you must speak to a dominant always go to them do not ask them to come to you and when you do keep your ears flattened."

Inuyasha's ears twitched in different directions as he thought about what he'd just been told. He ran over the main points under his breath, nodding to himself. "That's some interesting stuff. Ummm, since I'm hanyou, that'd put me pretty low on the totem pole in a formal setting, huh? Like, I'd probably be the last one to start eating."

Shaking his head slightly, he shifted gears. "So you'd be Sesshomaru-youkai? That's a mouthful. Have I been disrespecting you by not using that?"

"No that is," he hesitated a moment, "That is a term of deep submission used only rarely and except for extreme cases such as a life debt only after the specific act requiring such. Otherwise standard human terms suffice, personally I don't care, you can think someone is inept vermin and still name them properly, respect and disrespect are about actions. My being referred to by title was mostly Jaken's doing, it simply wasn't worth my effort to stop him."

"Technically you would be correct about the hierarchy unless you either fought to increase your standing or..."

Inuyasha cocked his head when the youkai seemed to hesitate. "Or what?"

Sesshomaru murmured, "Or if you mated to a high-standing demon. Whether dominant or submissive, having a ranking mate would increase your standing greatly."

Unable to help himself, Inuyasha chuckled humorlessly. When Sesshomaru cut him a sharp look, he shook his head. "I'm not laughing at the lesson. It's just...hanyou, remember? Demons hate me and look down on me because I'm half-human. No _way_ would any demon want to be mated to a half-breed, especially not a high-ranking one."

Sesshomaru frowned slightly at Inuyasha - the pup looked miserable and it wasn't as though he'd had no hand in that self-hatred.

"They're idiots," he said sharply. "But you have a point... if I were to claim you as bloodkin, it wouldn't make them respect you but it would place you in a position near my own and to dispute it would be a challenge to _my_ position."

Inuyasha glanced up at the sharp tone of 'They're idiots,' only for Sesshomaru to resume speaking calmly. When he finished, Inuyasha could feel his metaphorical tail wagging hopefully. "Would you...would you really consider that?"

Sesshomaru could smell the doubt and hope radiating off of his Inu-pup. "You want that?"

Inuyasha hesitated before giving a small nod. "Yeah. I mean, I'm not that worried about my status, but the idea of you actually claiming me as kin, when I _know _you've denied us being related before...just feels like kinda a big deal, that's all."

Sesshomaru nodded, "You shouldn't be so attached to 'family' though."

Inuyasha cocked his head and was about to reply when Koga arrived with a cloud of dust, "I've found a forest cave reeking with miasma It must be Naraku but there's a hell of a barrier...Oh it's this idiot again?" he broke off looking at Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru was already leaving; he would have Jaken take Rin out of camp while the wolf was there.

Sesshomaru really didn't care what the younger demon thought, but as he walked away, he heard Inuyasha snarl at him. "Watch it, mangy wolf."

Then he heard Koga replying. "Whatever, muttfa- Inuyasha? Are those demon markings?"

He passed out of ear-shot, smirking ever-so-slightly.

"Yeah I kicked my demon's ass," Inuyasha bragged and just for fun he called it forth, feeling the pressure as his eyes turned red and the slight itch of his marks darkening, his claws and fangs lengthening.

**"What do you think?"** Inuyasha asked in his roughened demon's voice. Koga tensed at the change in energy and scent and his ears flattened against the sides of his head as he let out an involuntary submissive whine.

"D-damn...that's...I've never heard of a half-demon like you managing that."

Inuyasha felt a thrumming in his blood at his rival's sudden submissive act. He ignored it, shaking his head as he chuckled. **"That's cause there ain't nobody **_**like**_** me. And Sesshomaru helped me."**

Koga was trembling slightly, his tail tucked down. With a frown, Inuyasha reined in his blood. The wolf relaxed, panting slightly and avoiding his eyes.

Inuyasha decided the next time Sesshomaru was teaching him about demon culture, he was gonna ask about this dominance thing.

"That bastard helped you? He barely even acknowledged my existence, even when I saved his pup. Did you actually get him to submit?" Koga asked the words tinged with awe.

Inuyasha laughed out loud, though the mental images intrigued him, 'You have _got _to be joking. Sesshomaru wouldn't submit, in any manner, to anyone. That's just...inconceivable."

As soon as the words were out of his mouth a memory flashed in his mind _'Forgive me Inuyasha-youkai.'_ He was aware that it wasn't the same thing as what Koga meant but oh holy fuck. So much had been going on lately he hadn't really thought about the import of the words. He'd been stuck on tail-wagging that he'd gotten some, any respect from his brother. He wondered with a flash of guilt if he'd been rude by brushing it off.

"What's that look?" Koga asked the smelly mu...best not even think that, _Inuyasha _looked like he'd just lost a stack of gold.

Ignoring the wolf, Inuyasha scented the breeze. Sesshomaru seemed to be back at camp, his scent close to the other pack members.

Convincing himself more and more by the second that he'd made a serious faux pas, he raced towards camp, intent on getting his brother alone so he could apologize.

Koga was left behind, scratching his head. "Uhhh, they did hear me about the cave, right?" he muttered to himself before heading for the camp.

Sesshomaru was watching Rin train with Sango waiting for the lesson to end before getting her out of camp. He saw Sango make an elegant jumping spin kick as she 'dodged' back, Rin ducked smoothly though Sango wouldn't have actually hit her. It wasn't a bad technique…with demon speed...He turned at Inuyasha's approach.

The pup was in a hurry and Sesshomaru immediately started sniffing for threats.

Not smelling anything untoward, except maybe the wolf, he frowned at the younger male, waiting for an explanation.

Inuyasha stopped running at the slight glare he got, seeing that Rin was training. Maybe his apology could wait; he didn't want to interrupt this moment.

"What?" Sesshomaru asked slightly annoyed by the interruption and hesitancy.

"Well...see I uh, could we talk a sec?" Inuyasha asked suddenly certain this had been a bad idea.

Sesshomaru moved away smelling faintly of irritation and Inuyasha followed, fervently hoping for a demon to attack.

"We could move if you want," Sango offered.

"You can bring Rin to Jaken and tell him to take her out of camp with Ah-Un until the wolf leaves."

"Oh…I could take her and teach her how to 'process' a demon if that's okay."

Sesshomaru's eyes widened realizing what a rare skill that was and how meaningful the offer was.

"Thank you."

The women left both smelling pleased.

Sesshomaru turned to glare at him, well he was really just looking but it felt like a glare.

"Well it's just the other day...I didn't really know what you were saying so...you know...I wasn't as appreciative as I guess I should have been and..."

"Inu-pup," Sesshomaru cut into his ramblings, "The whole point is that it _temporarily_ raises you above the other demon. You can respond as you please, you could have spit in my face and it would have been within your rights."

Inuyasha shook his head. "I wouldn't do that to you!"

Sesshomaru's eyes widened and he realized just how...vehement he'd sounded. "Uhh, in the past maybe, but not anymore."

"I was just making a point," he said stunned by the pup's reaction.

Inuyasha nodded, inhaling deeply of the youkai's scent. For decades, the smell of Sesshomaru had filled him with hate and fear.

Now, though, the scent seemed soothing and comforting, resulting in a sort of buzzing tingle in his body.

Well, _that_ was unusual.

He watched his brother from the corner of his eye; finding that he rather enjoyed doing so. Alert golden eyes watched their surroundings, the breeze stirring long silver hair and white fluff.

The youkai caught the change in Inuyasha's scent and his eyes narrowed, really? This again?

"Perhaps you should return to the 'pack' _now_."

Inuyasha wondered at the edge in Sesshomaru's tone, before catching the scent of arousal on himself. _Not again._

He thought of other things to distract himself. "I'm good."

Wondering if the youkai would make the connection, he asked hesitantly, "About demon culture...what can you tell me about mating?"

"You have _got_ to be fucking joking."

Inuyasha's first instinct was to run, but he forced himself to hold his ground. And what the - had Sesshomaru just cussed? He frowned at the youkai. "Well, mother died when I was still little, so I never got 'the talk'."

His ears twitched when he heard a soft "Hmm hmm," sound. Recognizing the sound as Sesshomaru laughing, he couldn't help but smile.

"This isn't funny, asshole," he said with no heat.

"It is, actually, but what I know is just observation; father died before I was that age. You're planning to drop your human now that you're a demon?" he asked disapproving strongly.

Inuyasha was taken aback. "My human?"

He thought for only a moment before realizing who the demon must mean. "Oh, Kagome?! No she isn't...we aren't...y'know...uhhh, she's not 'my' human. Umm..I..."

He hesitated, scratching at an ear. "Ummm there's not a _'my'_ anything. Never really has been."

Avoiding his brother's gaze, he focused on a butterfly fluttering over the flowers nearby. This could _not_ get any more awkward.

Sesshomaru nodded, he'd seen what father's behavior had done to his mother, he'd been the main target of her hurt and anger after father was gone, human or not no one deserved that.

He took a breath and imagined he was pulling an arrow out of a wound, quick was good, "Right. A female demon will pup after her first time with a dominant male, after that she can choose whether or not to. If she is with a male she's dominant over, though that's strongly discouraged, she will not be able to pup. Demons that aren't a canine type also won't be an issue."

Inuyasha nodded. "What uhhh determines dominance?"

Sesshomaru closed his eyes. "Usually a fight. Other feats of skill or strength. It's also possible for a demon to cede dominance, whether it be for one mating or for the duration of their...association."

So this was informative but..." Uhh...so...if...you only talked about female demons..." Inuyasha felt his face heat and looked anywhere but at the demon.

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow. "Male demons can mate with each other. Dominance between them is determined in the same ways."

Inuyasha smelled mortified and was blushing, looking anywhere but at Sesshomaru for which he was grateful.

Whatever his problem was though, the pup bravely pressed on. "How would...ummm...ok, if a male demon was interested in another male demon, how would he go about...expressing his interest? And uhhh what if the first one isn't really sure about how he feels, and is worried about rejection?"

Sesshomaru frowned thoughtfully; that was...oddly specific, "The first male would need to sort his feelings out first. Then, the most common way to initially express interest is to hunt and either present the prey to the one of interest, or leave it nearby. The second demon would then express his acceptance and own interest by eating the prey, or he would decline by ignoring it."

Inuyasha seemed engrossed in his 'lesson', "Ok, so if the second one rejects the first one, it doesn't have to be painful?"

Sesshomaru was confused by this line of questioning, and becoming a bit concerned. Was it possible Inuyasha was interested in someone who might hurt him?

He decided firmly that removing arrows would be more comfortable than this conversation, "Inu-pup if you think this vermin would hurt you, he isn't worthy."

Inuyasha's heart nearly stopped. Even if he hadn't been thinking of Sesshomaru as a possible 'demon of interest' the youkai's words were touching. "You...really feel that way?"

Sesshomaru frowned, "Unbalanced, abusive relationships between demons are hardly uncommon. I would be…displeased if you found yourself in such."

Inuyasha was almost panting, nervous, coming from Sesshomaru that was a death threat. He was so used to having to protect himself, he couldn't really process it but he definitely preferred having his brother at his back over crossing swords. He laughed hysterically as the image of two Sesshomarus fighting popped into his mind.

Sesshomaru gave him an odd look. "I uh have to go but thanks, really," he babbled already jumping into the branches. He had some hunting to do.

Sesshomaru tried to put his brother's odder-than-normal behavior out of mind as he relaxed against a boulder. He scented the air to assure his solitude, then closed his eyes.

In spite of his efforts, Inuyasha continued to circle his mind.

He found himself oddly uncomfortable with the idea that his brother was seeking a mate. Perhaps it was the wolf? He shook his head to dispel the irritation that came with the thought.

He sighed and tried to think of something else, only to remember the scent of desire on the hanyou. That particular smell had been...interesting.

With another sigh, he focused his mind on martial topics. Training, weapons, tactics. Much better.

X

Inuyasha ran through the woods trying to determine what would be the best piece of prey to offer, perhaps a demon to show off his skill, he didn't know if that would impress him though. He didn't want to look like he was trying too hard. Damnit even after nearly two months of traveling together he had no idea if the youkai had any preferences, he never expressed any particular enjoyment of one food over another nor did his hunting seem to favor anything specific.

In the end he got a deer and seasoned it with venom from a snake. He'd taken the snake with claws just to show off, he hoped it impressed Sesshomaru at least a little, the fucker had almost killed him. He had just carried both prey cautiously into camp when he caught Koga's scent tinged with fear.

"Hey what's up?" Inuyasha asked.

"I think I pissed off that arrogant mutt but I dunno what I did."

"Well what did he say?"

"Asked if I'd ever hurt a packmate, which - the fuck kinda question is that? An' then he told me to 'keep it that way'," Koga winced. " It doesn't sound like much when I say it like that but...I dunno...never mind I guess I'm just on edge with Naraku."

Inuyasha shook his head, stunned by the thought of his brother sticking up for him. His hands tightened on his prey as he answered, "Uhh yeah, that's probably it. We're all a little on edge. Don't worry about it."

X

Sesshomaru frowned when he caught the scent of his brother, anxious and unnerved. He rose to his feet and walked the short distance to camp. He paused inside the treeline when he saw Inuyasha talking to the ookami.

The hanyou was clutching a deer, and even from here, he could smell the venom of a rare serpent.

So, it _was_ the wolf that Inuyasha was interested in.

He would keep a close eye on that, the wolf seemed like the type to act out of emotion and that could get violent quickly especially since they were both mid-to-high dominant or deltas.

XxXx

"Hmm that smells good," Koga said. He playfully stole a leg of the deer and took a bite. He couldn't have Inuyasha think him a complete coward after all.

Sesshomaru retreated glad that wolf had accepted, however he thought back to that night by the river. He couldn't let that happen again, not that he'd intended to anyway but now he had to assume that any weakness Inuyasha saw the wolf would also be aware of.

He ignored the odd sense of discomfort that he felt.

X

Inuyasha gaped for a second before sputtering with inarticulate rage. "Why, you...that wasn't for _you_! Dammit, that was for Sesshomaru!"

He couldn't offer something with a piece missing! That just felt...wrong.

The wolf blinked. "Can't he hunt? Why would you -...Oh. Oh crap! Are you fucking _serious_?! What the hell?"

Inuyasha felt his ears tilt back in doubt and distress. "What? Is there something wrong with that? Because we're brothers?" he asked defensively.

Koga shook his head. "No, that's not a problem for demons. But, isn't he like royalty? He rules the Western Province, like how the Northern Mountains are mine. You'd need something more...impressive."

In shock that Koga seemed to be trying to help, Inuyasha asked, "Like what?"

The dark ookami looked thoughtful. "Maybe a predator instead of the usual prey? Like a big cat? Some kinda hunter that's dangerous in its own right."

Inuyasha nodded, handing over the deer. "Here, might as well have this. Got your rabies on it now. And...thanks."

It was dark by the time Inuyasha returned badly scratched up but exceedingly proud of his mountain cat. He cautiously approached the object of interest where he was lounging against a tree looking deceptively at ease. Inuyasha knew he had his senses tuned for danger. He carefully dropped his offering and stepped back nervously.

Sesshomaru looked at him, at the food then back at him with widened eyes.

"The Wolf accepted you did he not?" he asked, and the calm was paper thin. What was the pup doing? His wolf would be forced to fight for him.

Inuyasha took a deep breath and tried not to stammer. "He wasn't...that deer wasn't for _him_. He just...sorta grabbed some."

He took another couple steps back, ears laying back with uncertainty and a trace of the old fear. Sesshomaru wasn't moving, golden eyes shifting between him and the cat every few moments.

Struck by the doubt he'd managed to keep at bay until now, he opened his mouth and the words just came, "This was really stupid, huh? I know it was stupid. Fuck, I'm sorry."

Unconsciously, he began rubbing his cheek markings, eyes fixed on the hunt he'd been so proud of. "I know...I know I'm not good enough. I'm sorry, just...don't be mad…please? Look, I'll take it back, ok?"

Still rubbing one cheek, he reached out to drag the 'gift' away, only for a clawed hand to close lightly around his wrist.

"It just needs a little poison," Sesshomaru said gently, remembering the delicious smell of the gift he'd thought was for the wolf, now aware of why Inuyasha'd prepared it so carefully.

He let go of Inuyasha's wrist and cross-hatched the cat's shoulder with poisoned claws. He tore a section off, took a bite and held the remainder out to Inuyasha.

Inuyasha stared for all of a heartbeat, then accepted the offered piece. He sat down near the cat, watching to make sure he didn't step wrong. He ate his piece, then, as Sesshomaru was lowering himself to the ground, he tore off a piece and copied Sesshomaru's actions. He took a bite and offered the rest.

The youkai accepted with a small nod, and Inuyasha's heart _pounded_. Geez he needed to calm down!

"Should you ever do this with an Alpha, they will not share, it is not how the ritual works so don't expect it," Sesshomaru said as he seasoned another piece.

Inuyasha almost choked. "Umm, well I ain't planning on huntin' down prey for anyone else. And I doubt demons are lining up to invite me to eat with them."

He tilted his head thoughtfully. "I thought Alpha was leader, like you're Alpha to your part of the pack, and I'm Alpha to mine? Am I wrong?"

"It is, but it has a second meaning as a way to generally categorize one's dominance. It's not set in stone but it usually holds true. Alphas will almost always be dominant, Deltas like you and Koga may occasionally follow an alpha but will usually have their own packs, betas and omegas make up the pack members."

Inuyasha nodded as he absorbed the information. "Ok, so I'm a Delta? That sounds cool. And you own being an Alpha, y'know?"

Sesshomaru nodded, then stopped eating. Inuyasha frowned. "'S wrong?"

The youkai inclined his head. "If ignoring the offering is a refusal, and eating your fill of it is acceptance and returned interest, then what might eating a few bites mean?"

"A tease, it'd just be stringing someone along!"

Sesshomaru was surprised by the vehemence, "It means that the party is interested but not ready to make a decision."

Inuyasha's scent grew ridiculously complicated, with fear, doubt, happiness and more. He looked so upset that Sesshomaru cast about for a way to soften the blow.

He remembered that he no longer had to worry about Inuyasha sharing his secrets with Koga and so said, "You are wrong. I'm not an alpha. By definition alphas lead packs. Jaken and Rin follow by choice and I don't lead them into battle or on hunts, gamma is the term for one who stands outside the hierarchy. I have no desire to lead." _Again._

"Gamma," Inuyasha said, testing the word, then nodded. "Ok. That makes sense if they're following by choice."

He tilted his head curiously. "So, if you're 'outside the hierarchy', what decides how you interact with different statuses? Like, would you have to defer to an Alpha in a formal setting? Or, and this what I'd think would happen, would you kick his ass and eat first?"

"These," he raised his claws, "Normally decide, for a gamma everything is either a fight or deference. I find most demons simply wait until I start eating though."

Inuyasha nodded, his eyes flicking over the long claws. "They probably know better than to fuck with you."

Sesshomaru inclined his head. "Indeed. You are the only one I've had to fight multiple times, and unlike the others, you weren't afraid after a fight."

Inuyasha frowned, "Yeah, I was - we went over this before, when we were getting my demon under control."

The youkai gave a slight nod and to Inuyashsa's surprise his eyes held a hint of respect, "Very well, you were the only one not to show your fear."

Inuyasha swelled with pride and chomped another piece of cat so he wouldn't have to reply. Excellent, Sesshomaru praised him and he was getting choked up over it, baka.

"Do you intend to attack the cave tomorrow?" Sesshomaru asked.

Inuyasha nodded, "I can take down some nasty barriers with the red Tetsusaiga. Our pack is in good health and can fight. Koga will be there too, and he's not a half-bad fighter, for a mangy wolf."

He realized that Sesshomaru hadn't implied _he_ would be attacking, "What are your plans?"

"To fight," Sesshomaru said simply. Inuyasha was surprised by how relieved he felt and looked at the ground embarrassed that Sesshomaru must smell it on him.

Sesshomaru cast a glance at his companion. So, Inuyasha wanted him there? The sensation of being wanted was strange and different from how Rin wanted him around. Inuyasha didn't really need him, only wanted him.

Why? He'd certainly made the pup's life nothing but miserable before the last several weeks. But Inuyasha wanted that kind of bond with him?

Well, the younger male _had_ hunted down this rather tasty cat. And seemed to have moments of horrible insecurity and shyness around him. It was...hmmm. He wasn't even sure what word to use but it made him feel strangely protective.

He wondered if Inuyasha knew about the customs and rules of mating, then remembered that he hadn't known anything before the lessons.

He would probably need to educate him further, and make sure that Inuyasha really wanted that bond with him.

Inuyasha smelled the low level interest in his brother and flattened his ears in pleasure and closed his eyes involuntarily. He wished desperately to know what he had done to cause such a reaction.

Sesshomaru on the other hand kept flashing back to the night by the river. He would do whatever it took, short of harming Rin, to keep the person who would treat him like that, like an actual living being, around.

Inuyasha noticed that Sesshomaru still wasn't eating more of the cat. "Hey, you told me what eating a few bites meant. I know now, so you can have some more if you want. Besides, I think I'm developing a taste for your poison."

Dear gods, would he _ever_ stop saying such awkward, stupid stuff?

Sesshomaru's lips twitched. The youkai filled his claws with poison and dragged them though the meat of their meal's flank.

They fed quietly for a while, then Inuyasha sighed contentedly. "We're gonna kick ass tomorrow."

Sesshomaru gave what Inuyasha considered his death smile. "Indeed."

If he needed any more confirmation that it was good to have someone to rely on, that smile was it. It filled him with a confidence he had never known.

"I get now why so many demons were ready to follow you," he said happily, without thinking.

Sesshomaru's eyes flashed with pain for a fraction of a second before going ice cold. The demon nodded as was expected, but he was already contemplating ways to keep Inuyasha safe and out of that cave tomorrow.


	7. Mistakes

7: Mistakes

Warnings: mentions of sex, torture, and general hurtful behavior.

* * *

_((Sesshomaru's eyes flashed with pain for a fraction of a second before going ice cold. The demon nodded as was expected, but he was already contemplating ways to keep Inuyasha safe and out of that cave tomorrow.))_

Inuyasha's head lifted as the scent of a demon came to him. It smelled like low-class vermin, but he was still excited to try his new form out, he raced toward the threat.

His brother's voice came behind him. "Calm is the key, remember."

Inuyasha smiled. This would be fun, god he felt invincible! He stalked toward the demon as a hanyou awaiting its reaction when he showed his true power. Sesshomaru followed at a distance, not to interfere, but to observe his 'student'. He could tell that Inuyasha was excited, but staying in control. Good. Control was the whole point.

The fighters of the pack had gathered and were ready but stayed back as their alpha arrived

The invading demon was large, but smaller than Sesshomaru's true form. It appeared to be reptilian, a bit bony, but soon proved itself to be both belligerent and stupid.

"Half-breed!" it hissed at Inuyasha and Sesshomaru gave a ghost of a smile. The reptile had just lost any chance to get out of this alive.

Inuyasha lost all desire to toy with the demon and called up his demon form with a roar of triumph. He leaped forward, drawing Tetsusaiga and decapitating the enemy in one fluid motion.

Inuyasha landed, smiling as adrenaline coursed through him. He felt on top of the world.

"Well done," Sesshomaru said, genuinely impressed.

**"Like I give a shit what you think," **Inuyasha laughed and his demon laughed with him.

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow, he'd been under the impression that his brother did indeed care what he thought. Perhaps this was a side-effect of the demonizing.

"As you say," he turned back for camp.

Inuyasha grabbed Kagome and kissed her passionately, she stiffened in surprise before melting in his grip with a little moan. Inuyasha broke the kiss suddenly aware that everyone except his brother was glaring at him, well that was new.

He reined in his demon blood. "What?"

As everyone shook their heads and headed back to whatever they'd been doing, Inuyasha realised what he'd just done. _Why did I kiss Kagome?__  
_  
Shaking his own head, he followed the others, feeling uncharacteristically meek when he realized Sesshomaru's icy gaze was glaring at everyone and everything, except him.

Crap. What now?

_**'He's not ready to make a decision**_.' Inuyasha stiffened at the rough voice that reverberated through his skull. He'd already made his demonic nature recede, and in any event, the demon hadn't spoken to him since he'd gained control.

_'What?'_

'_**If he's not ready, there's no need to wait for him**_.'

Then it grew quiet in his head again. Inuyasha took a shaky breath, trying to act calm. The demon could no longer take over like it once had, but he _had_ kissed Kagome. Maybe it still could affect his decisions.

The thought was terrifying.

Wondering if his theory was right led to daunting thoughts. Didn't his demon side share his interest in Sesshomaru? If not, what did that mean for him and the youkai?

Koga grabbed Inuyasha's arm and dragged him off.

"We need to talk," the ookami growled.

Sesshomaru's expression didn't change but his senses stretched out, trying to eavesdrop, as beneath him as that act was.

X

Inuyasha let Koga drag him along for a bit before pulling his arm away. "The fuck are you doin'?"

Koga frowned at him. "I thought you were interested in that stuck-up brother of yours?"

Inuyasha reacted automatically. "I am! And don't call him names."

The wolf raised his eyebrows. "If you're interested in him as a mate, then tell me, what the _fuck_ was that kiss about?"

Inuyasha's ears laid back, "I...I don't know. It just...happened. And Koga, my inner demon spoke to me."

Blue eyes widened at him, and he continued, "It said Sesshomaru isn't ready to make a decision. Which is true - he only ate a few bites of my kill at first, and told me what that meant. But...my demon said if he's not ready, then there's no point in waiting."

"Okay point one," Koga held up a threatening claw, "where exactly do you think treating him like part of a harem is going to get you? Point two," another claw, "If he does decide to accept, what you do you think that scary bastard's going to do to everyone you've so much as looked at? Are you certain you can control him? Because I know I'll be getting out of dodge."

Inuyasha frowned as literally only one part of Koga's diatribe registered. "I don't want to 'control' him."

The wolf closed his eyes and took a very long breath. "Muttface, you're missing the point. You don't treat a potential mate like they're replaceable. I doubt he would tolerate either being second choice _or_ you having a...uhh...well, a mistress."

Inuyasha was taken aback when the sapphire eyes opened and focused on him intently. "You want him for a mate? You control that horny demon inside of you and you find a way to show your brother that he's fucking _important_ to you."

Inuyasha sighed and nodded though he'd be damned if he knew _how_ to do that. He also didn't intend to let his brother string him along and he was becoming more and more certain that was what was going on.

He needed to find out for sure. But how to do that? He didn't think asking straight out would go well.

Lacking much in the way of options he waited for Sango to return from her trip with Rin and cornered her.

"Hey," he said his voice low.

"Yeah?"

"What would you do if you were uh interested in someone but they just kind of leave you in limbo?"

Sango raised her eyebrows, her expression clearly saying, 'are you serious?'

"You mean like me and Miroku? Where he says he wants to be with me but then leaves me hanging to flirt with others?"

Inuyasha groaned as he realized that though he'd been talking about his brother, he wasn't helping the situation, "Oh gods, I'm fucking _Miroku_!"

Sango nodded stiffly and lowered her own voice, "You know that hurts right?" she admitted.

"Ugh come on. He can take it, if he cared that much he'd have given me a straight answer," Inuyasha muttered, embarrassed.

She turned to face him and gave him a woman's patented men-are-idiots look, "You are _not_ this dense. It's _worse_ for him, at least I can be pissed off and everyone gets it. He'd die before he'd show you'd hurt him. He doesn't seem like the type to give second chances either so don't expect him to be as forgiving as I am."

Inuyasha felt his ears tilting back as he asked quietly, "You really think I might've hurt him?"

Sango shrugged. "Miroku's lechery was hurting me long before I realized how I felt about him. Maybe Sesshomaru isn't sure how he feels, or maybe he's not ready, but that doesn't mean your actions don't affect him."

Inuyasha nodded. "I need to make sure I keep my demon side more completely under control and not let it affect my decisions again."

X

Sesshomaru lounged against a maple where Jaken and Ah-Un had moved so they could avoid the wolf, mindlessly deflecting Rin's bokken attacks with his claws while he thought about what the ookami had said. He was an annoying creature and Sesshomaru would very much like for him to stay out of his affairs but he hadn't been entirely wrong either. Well that would be Inuyasha's decision to make when the time came.

"Sesshomaru-sama?"

He focused on Rin.

"Why is my left back-cut so weak?"

"Because your left arm is weaker than your right."

Rin frowned she'd been hoping that she'd been doing something wrong, "So I have to get stronger?"

"Simply exercise them equally the imbalance will correct itself."

Rin nodded thinking that she would ask Sango for new exercises.

The next day dawned bright and clear. Sesshomaru rose from his usual position just outside of camp, watching as the others woke and readied themselves.

He turned to Jaken. "You will keep Rin on Ah-Un outside. You _will _stay with her. And you _will_ leave if there's trouble."

The toad nodded. "Yes, me'lord."

Sesshomaru gave a slight nod and went to join the others, observing Inuyasha as his brother walked among their pack, having a few words for each member.

"Ready?" he asked Inuyasha too quiet for the others to hear.

Inuyasha nodded.

Sesshomaru hesitated knowing that it was probably futile before adding, "You don't have to come. If you break the barrier, Koga and I can handle it." It stung to say that he needed Inuyasha's power but it was true, he made a mental note to find a way to break barriers as well.

"You can't be serious," Inuyasha snarled. "I wouldn't miss this if my life depended on it."

"It very well might."

"What the hell! Since when are _you _squeamish?" Inuyasha snapped, aggravated that the demon who'd _tried_ to kill him repeatedly was suddenly getting in his way.

"Do as you will," Sesshomaru said walking toward the others. He'd tried. Objectively he was proud of Inuyasha, he wouldn't want anyone in his life, kin or otherwise, that would back down so easily. _Otherwise_...he blocked that out, there was a battle to fight.

Inuyasha glanced at the group, still annoyed and everyone seemed to know the look meant 'move'.

They headed in the direction Koga said, and had only been traveling a few hours before coming upon the cave. This was definitely something; the barrier was strong and reeked of Naraku and demons. As they reached the cave Inuyasha caught a faint scent of worry in his brother's scent under the more obvious nerves, fear and excitement of the rest of the pack.

He thought back to their conversation and, taunts aside, the truth was Sesshomaru was never concerned about anything except maybe Rin. A bit of worry was like outright fear in anyone else and he'd be an idiot to ignore the warning there. He also remembered their talk about the panther war 'it wasn't a judgement on your abilities'.

Sesshomaru hated losing his followers, that much was obvious from the simple fact that he must have been in agony to show that much vulnerability. Likely he saw it as a personal failing. Inuyasha was galled by the implication that he was a follower but tried to put it aside. He thought about his pack, they all had strengths and weaknesses, he'd never been in a position to think of himself in the same terms, but the fact was even with his full demon form, Sesshomaru was still faster and more agile than him.

It made sense for the youkai to be in front, he would be more likely to avoid an attack by a lurking enemy and Inuyasha with the more powerful sword could follow and still not have to worry about accidentally hitting him.

Inuyasha held Tetsusaiga out, and it turned red. He swung at the barrier, and they all watched as it crumbled.

X

Sesshomaru was surprised and pleased that his brother didn't run straight in. Instead, the hanyou held up a hand, signaling the others to wait.

Sesshomaru drew Tokijin and took point, proceeding into the cave down a wide tunnel. About a hundred yards in the path forked. The demon stopped and looked at Inuyasha. A silent question of how to proceed.

Inuyasha's nose was working overtime. His first thought had been to split up, but if they faced Naraku, they needed to be at full strength. So he sniffed urgently, honing in on the left tunnel. "This one smells more like that bastard."

He glanced to Sesshomaru to see a slight nod of agreement.

He and the older demon set off down the left tunnel, their pack, minus Rin, Jaken, and Ah-Un, following warily behind. This tunnel was was considerably narrower than the main one, maybe ten feet wide by eight high and would severely limit their fighting options, he was unconcerned but he could smell nervousness on the humans and Koga who's best feature was his mobility.

The scent of Naraku became putrid, causing Inuyasha, Shippo, and even Sesshomaru to cover their noses. It wasn't long until the humans had covered their noses as well.

Inuyasha stumbled the scent making him nauseous but no way in hell would he back down before Sesshomaru.

He felt something approaching fear suddenly enter the youkai's scent as the demon said, "Miroku do you have a technique to sense enemies? This scent's camouflage."

"There's a shard..." Kagome yelled, spinning around and raising her bow. Sesshomaru and Inuyasha rushed back the way they'd come dodging a chained kama. Sesshomaru leaped and his sword caught Kohaku's leg, tearing it open as Inuyasha shouted a warning.

Then demons were swarming the tunnel in front of where they had idiotically left the humans who now created a buffer between themselves and the press of demons.

Inuyasha cursed as he dodged the chain scythe, leaping towards the wall just to launch himself off of it towards Kohaku. The kama came at him again, but Tokijin was there, driving against the chain to disrupt the weapon's path.

Inuyasha smiled grimly at the assistance - it really _was_ better to have his brother on his side.

He flung himself at the disarmed boy. "Snap out of it, Kohaku!" he snarled as he punched the kid square in the jaw.

Kohaku dropped like a stone.

Trusting Sesshomaru to handle that opponent should he rise again, Inuyasha whirled and charged back down the tunnel. Sainyosho littered the demon pack, neutralizing the Wind Tunnel. The monk, Koga and Sango were battling fiercely hand-to-hand, while Shippo drove the poisonous insects away from a rapidly-firing Kagome with his Fox-fire.

Inuyasha forced his way through the pack then leapt forward, calling up his demon blood. The heat of battle accelerated the transformation; one moment, he was hanyou, the next he was demon.

These scum were going to die today.

Inuyasha felt the demon roar in pleasure as he dove into the fray, blood singing in his veins as he tore through the horde. Sesshomaru joined in behind him skillfully wielding Tokijin despite the residual stiffness in his hand.

Sango screamed and expecting Inuyasha to go to her, he stepped aside ready to cover his brother's back while he rescued his pack mate. Except Inuyasha didn't even seem to hear.

"Inuyasha help!" Miroku roared. Shit, Sesshomaru launched himself back to where the pack was fighting desperately against more demons that must have been waiting outside the tunnel. How had they not smelled them?

He tore into the mass with Tokijin. When he'd secured some room he took a page from Sango's book, demon speed and agility joining with claws to turn her pretty kicks into a whirl of claw and steel. Where his artificial dew claws Ko gyoko broke flesh blood sprayed and kept flowing as through from a severed artery. Soon enough the tunnel stood empty and Inuyasha trotted back panting and grinning like an idiot.

**"This demon shit's fun!"** he exclaimed, flush with testosterone and his demon blood.

"That was amazing Inuyasha," Kagome said breathlessly.

He kissed her, his tongue invading her mouth as she made little happy noises. Sesshomaru focused on wiping the blood from his sword in disgust.

Inuyasha's eyes were glowing red and he missed the looks-can-kill glare Sango was giving him as his hand slipped up between Kagome's legs to her _very_ obvious pleasure. Oblivious to the pain that flashed in his brother's eyes as he sheathed Tokijin forcefully.

"Damn even I'm not that crass," Miroku muttered. Sango dragged him and Shippo away with a sympathetic glance at the taiyoukai. He turned to follow them, with a glare that dared someone to say something. Sango looked straight ahead, she could practically feel his desire to draw that sword again and definitely didn't want to give him an excuse.

Inuyasha groped Kagome's damp panties and pushed her up against the wall of the cave. She praised him loudly and repeatedly as he fucked her. It _was_ fucking too, pure meaningless lust but she either didn't care or didn't know the difference. His ego swelled to every bit of praise no matter how exaggerated and lust driven.

"Oh Inuyaashaaaa more."

Sesshomaru savagely ignored the thoughts in his head, it was none of _his_ business who his Inu-pup decided to kiss…or grope...or rut with. If only the scents were so easy to ignore. Very well, if this was how things were, there was nothing he could do about it. He thought about leaving but that would mean tearing Rin away from her lessons when she was learning so much. _Fuck_.

The pack, wrung out and exhausted, set up a minimalist camp while, Sesshomaru, who seemed as at ease as the natural born killer he was, went to check on his followers. Sesshomaru returned with Jaken, ah-Un and Rin who ran up with a large bag of foragings. They all dug in, starving from the battle while Sesshomaru left to hunt, still disdaining food that didn't bleed. Conveniently it gave him an excuse to leave behind the scents and moans of lust issuing from the cave.

Sesshomaru was only hunting with half his attention. The rest was on what had happened in the cave. He was...well he wasn't sure what exactly it was, but it resembled anger and hurt and disgust and 'damn that priestess!' all rolled into a tight knot somewhere between his throat and his stomach.

He shook his head, glad he'd come out alone. It gave him time to think.

He decided he shouldn't put too much stock in it. Inuyasha had said flat out that he was uncertain about his feelings and just because he'd advised him to sort himself out before making advances didn't mean Inuyasha had. He'd refrain from getting emotionally invested until things played out a bit. That had long been his habit as Rin would attest.

Still, the thought of losing the one person who he could actually let his guard down around stung. Then again, that was only beneficial to him - Inuyasha had a whole pack to do so with; obviously he wouldn't value it the same way Sesshomaru did. He regretted that night by the river, he never should have asked Inuyasha to stay.

He realized that he'd been killing indiscriminately without eating. There was nothing else to do so he gathered his prey, two boar and a deer and dragged them back to camp to share. He gritted his teeth as the wind changed direction and brought Inuyasha and the priestess' scents, lustful and excited from the woods a short distance from the cave mouth.

Shippo immediately ran up to dig into the food with a nostalgic smile. Sesshomaru took a share of boar away to eat thus indicating that the others were free to take what was left.

Sesshomaru dug his claws into his recently healed palm, as his sharp ears caught the sounds of the priestess' pleasure but he forced himself to relax and eat, he couldn't leave without revealing Inuyasha's actions had wounded him and avoiding that was a habit so ingrained as to not even cross his mind.

He was still eating despite a complete lack of appetite when he caught a whiff of Inuyasha approaching camp, covered in Kagome's scent. Disgust aside he was intrigued, now that the demon blood had receded, the hanyou's scent had changed from excitement and lust to stress and guilty confusion.

Inuyasha glanced in his direction as he approached with the priestess clinging to his arm. Sesshomaru met those amber eyes and held them, then deliberately turned his head, refusing to look at his brother again.

Inuyasha sat down and sighed morosely, resting his chin on his knees.

Kagome shyly held up a carrot to feed to Inuyasha, thrilled by the new development in their relationship.

Inuyasha took no notice of the offered carrot. _**Pathetic.**_

'You _shut up!_'

Sango gave Kagome a look and she went to the older woman glaring over being separated from Inuyasha.

Sango led her away but soon Inuyasha picked up bits of a heated discussion.

"I'm just saying for your own sake don't get involved with Inuyasha until he figures it out. Trust me."

"It's none of your business for one and if he picks me that's not really my fault," Kagome replied.

Sango just shook her head. She'd seen the way Inuyasha looked and acted around Sesshomaru, and she was sure that, despite his demon being happy to fuck Kagome, the hanyou himself was _not_ going to pick the priestess as his mate.

Inuyasha retreated to a tree his hunger gone, fidgeting as he wondered how he was going to make up for his mistake. For starters he wasn't going to call his blood forward again.

It seemed risky to try using his demon side in battle again. Apparently, his demon was ready to rut after victory. He shook his head, drooping ears laid back with the weight of his regret.

Sesshomaru had said nothing, but Inuyasha sensed the disturbance in the youkai's aura. He'd hurt his brother, and he needed to fix this.

XxXx

That night long after the pack had gone to sleep Sesshomaru sat on the bank of the stream alone and stared at his beloved moon. When he scented Inuyasha, dominance and Kagome's scent still clung to him, eye wateringly strong. Sesshomaru snarled a challenge, it was immature but Inuyasha had made his choice and he had no right to be angry. Still in extreme circumstances it was natural to hide wounds behind aggression.

Inuyasha paused at the challenging snarl, but didn't respond to it. Ever since his impulsive toss with Kagome he'd had a horrible guilty feeling in his gut. And hadn't been able to stop thinking about Sesshomaru. Which was stupid, it wasn't like there was something actually established between them and he'd _cheated..._ the youkai snarled again, a ferocious sound that made his ears lay back in uncertain fear.

"I…I'm not here to fight, I just wanna talk."

Cold golden eyes flicked to him, then back to the moon.

"Not until you wash that stench off." Inuyasha gave a little involuntary squeak and went to wash the scent off. Sesshomaru would have taunted him but he was more concerned with composing himself. Once he'd gathered his senses, he watched from the corner of his eye as the hanyou washed himself.

Inuyasha had removed his fire-rat robe and undershirt, sniffing himself before rubbing down with water and sniffing again. Oddly, those big velvety ears were drooping a bit. He tried to remember when he'd seen this 'expression' before…ah when Inuyasha had shared the kimari memory.

Then…the younger male was sad or hurt? About what?

"Inu-pup?" Sesshomaru asked concerned despite himself.

Inuyasha's ears perked at the…endearment? He still wasn't sure _what _it was but he was sure he liked it. Having washed off as much of Kagome's scent as he could without getting naked, he crept over to sit at his brother's side, whispering, "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Sesshomaru asked nonchalant. "I made my choice and you made your's - there's nothing between us."

Inuyasha's ears drooped father and he bolted. Sesshomaru turned his face up to the moon again and tried to believe that the scent was what made his nose and eyes burn.

XxXx

Inuyasha found himself back in camp and saw Sango was still awake. He really didn't want to alone so he approached.

"Can't sleep?"

The slayer shook her head and continued to stare into the fire.

Inuyasha bit his lip, glancing around at everyone else sleeping then holding back a sigh he settled at Sango's side.

Yes, he had his own troubles, but he could put those aside for the moment when one of his pack needed him.

"You seem to have the same problem," Sango muttered, "Someone seems to think you want him and you want Kagome."

Inuyasha huffed. "I don't want Kagome. She's not...she's not the one for me, ok?"

Sango nodded, now if she could talk her brain into thinking the same, "He's alright then?"

Inuyasha hesitated.

"I...don't know. I know I fucked up. But I just..." He cut off, shook his head and gave his companion an appraising look, "I came over to try and help you, not the other way around."

He sighed and looked at the fire. "How did we get into such a mess?"

Sango shook her head, "I don't know. School uniforms?"

He snorted at that. "Ok, yeah. I can see that. How did _I_ get into _my_ mess?"

The slayer gave him a playfully wry smile. "Masochism?"

He opened mouth to retort, but had nothing. An image flashed in his mind of his supremely lethal, confidently dangerous brother. "Huh...you might be onto something."

Sango laughed then turned serious, "You never do anything halfway do you? I think there are a couple Naraku incarnations you haven't pissed off yet."

Inuyasha bared his fangs. "I'll get to them sooner or later."

Sango laughed, "It wasn't a suggestion. That demon really gave you a confidence boost huh?"

Inuyasha started to nod, but remembered that his demon was the reason for his current predicament. He shook his head and sighed. "Gave me a boost of something, alright."

Remembering the suppressed scent of hurt, he shook his head again, whispering,"Sesshomaru's never gonna forgive me, is he?"

Sango shrugged, "How would I know? I've barely even talked to him, it's not like we hang out...still he forgave you for cutting off his arm right?"

Inuyasha nodded; if Sesshomaru hadn't let that go, surely there would have been more trouble between them before now.

The thought that he may have ruined their chances made his heart hurt. Blinking, he glanced away from Sango, hoping she wouldn't notice.

"You know," Sango began with a spark of realization as she laid a hand on his shoulder, "Maybe you'd have better luck if you saw how similar you are. It would probably be easier for everyone if you treated him like an actual flesh and blood creature instead of just a standard to compare yourself to," she smiled knowingly.

Inuyasha smiled back. "That's an idea. I have been looking at at him...differently lately."

"Hmm, how so? Or do you mean in the way I've been looking at Kagome?" she asked blushing a little.

Inuyasha tilted his head, chuckling a bit. "That way, _and_ looking at him as a flesh-and-blood person. Like he's got...not weaknesses, but just he's not as perfect and impervious as I've always thought."

Sango nodded, "The question is though: do you see him as an equal? Until you do any relationship is doomed."

Inuyasha hesitated. "I don't know; he's better than me, like in every way."

Sango thought, "That can't be true. people follow you, care about you, look at the pack. You don't need to rule by fear."

Inuyasha shrugged, not feeling praise-worthy at all, "Jaken and Rin don't really fear him, hell you guys get hurt following me more often than they seem to. Like I said though, for all that power he still has feelings, and...I hurt them."

Sango blinked, she really hadn't thought that the demon would confront Inuyasha, "He said that?"

Inuyasha bit his lip. "No, he didn't say shit, actually. Just...the way he acted. Like he wasn't acting like himself."

Sango nodded her lips pressed thin, "So have you made a choice yet?"

Inuyasha nodded, unaware of the sad smile curving his lips. "Him. If he'll still have me."

The thought that Sesshomaru might not want to be his mate made his chest tighten. "Even if he won't, I don't want anyone else."

He quickly rose and turned his head away. "Good luck, Sango."

"You too," Sango whispered knowing his sharp ears would pick it up and she watched as he disappeared into the woods.

XxXx

Damn it. Sesshomaru sniffed the air again, a definite Inuyasha-salt smell. He wasn't obligated to care but at the same time, Inuyasha hadn't done anything wrong, he hadn't answered so Inuyasha was free to do as he pleased. Really wasn't it better this way at least he wasn't under any delusions that he was special to the pup. He followed the scent to Inuyasha's tree.

"Inu-pup what's wrong?" he asked quietly

Inuyasha hurriedly wiped his face while debating on whether or not to confess his troubled thoughts. The sound of his brother calling him 'Inu-pup' and asking what was wrong made him want to start crying again.

"I just...I'm an asshole for letting my demon affect my actions the way it does. The things I've done, they're not what _I_ wanted to do. But demon or not, they're still _my _actions."

With one graceful move, Sesshomaru leapt and landed on his branch. Intense golden eyes watched him intently, appraisingly.

"Inuyasha, why did you bring me that cat?"

"I uh...I wanted you to be my mate and...Koga said you wouldn't accept anything less and..." he trailed off.

That wasn't what he'd meant, "Then your feelings have changed? Or were you wrong in the first place?"

Inuyasha blinked with his jaw hanging open. "I..uh..."

Sesshomaru turned away and shifted to jump down, and Inuyasha felt a desperate panic grip his heart. "Wait!"

The youkai seemed not to hear him.

"Please? Please wait? I'm just...I've always been shit at explaining myself, ok? Just give me a minute?"

Sesshomaru seemed to hesitate for a long moment, not looking at him. Finally, his brother turned to face him, watching him with a well-concealed expectancy.  
Only Inuyasha wasn't sure if it was an expectancy for good news or bad.

He took a deep breath and tried to order his thoughts. "Ok, I guess first would be that I've become...attracted to you. Like, wildly. And I really tried not to be. I mean, I know you said male demons can mate with other males, but I wasn't really raised that way. And Koga said us being brothers doesn't matter, but that kinda thing is pretty looked down on among humans. I know I'm not one, but I did a lot of my growing up around them."

He fidgeted with his claws. "So I really, _really _tried not to be attracted to you, cause logically, to me, it seemed wrong. But..." He raised one hand to his chest to cover his heart. "I know you don't put much stock in emotions and feelings, but even though I thought it was wrong, it _felt_ right."

Inuyasha sighed. "So, that led to me thinking about you a lot. You and the kind of relationship we had in the past. I always wanted...I always wanted to be close to you? Not like how I want now, but just...fuck I am _really_ bad at this!"

"Then why?" he stopped speaking before his voice broke, glaring at Inuyasha because it seemed the safest expression.

Inuyasha almost wilted under the glare, then squared his shoulders. "Look, I know I'm not great at expressing myself and my feelings, but it's not like I've had a great role-model for that! I _am_ trying, y'know."

He took a deep breath. "Sorry, I'm not tryin' to fight with you. I'm not sure what you expect from me though. I thought I was in love before. But compared to how I feel about you, I'm not so sure that's what I felt before. But that doesn't mean it's how I feel now."

He scooted a little closer to the older male, breathing in his scent. "I _am_ sure that we could have something really good if we both gave it a fair shot. It'd probably be a lot of work, but I think it'd be worth it."

The youkai was still glaring, but not as intensely. "I _meant_, why her? Why do you turn to her if you feel this way?"

_Oh._

"I...I don't know. It has to do with my demon. Like, all I really know is when I'm demonized and win a battle, I feel the urge to fuck."

His head came up as he remembered. "My demon spoke to me before. It said you weren't ready, and that there was no point in waiting, but that's not how I feel."

He lowered his eyes and scratched his head as his ears drooped. "Damn, I thought that might explain it, but it came out sounding like I'm blaming you for what I did."

"Stay away from me until you figure it out. When you do..." he swallowed hard, but the words still came out rougher than they should have, "If you feel the same consider your offer accepted."

Remembering Inuyasha's claim of wanting to be close he forced himself to continue. "If not no harm done." he dropped from the tree, cursing his burning eyes and Inuyasha's damned 'feelings'.

Inuyasha smelled the faintest scent of tears as the youkai walked away more quickly than usual.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck!_

Part of him desperately wanted to give chase and try to comfort Sesshomaru, and part of him wanted to ask the demon how _he _felt. But he sensed that neither advance would be welcome right now.

Fuck it all.

Oh double fuck, Inuyasha could smell Kagome approaching and he had no way of getting away without it being obvious he was avoiding her.

"Inuyasha I was just," she began sweetly then frowned when she saw his expression, the last time she'd seen that look had been after he'd caused Rin to be hurt. "Was Sesshomaru giving you trouble?"

Inuyasha frowned down at the human. He jumped down to the ground; if he got 'sat' for this, he didn't wanna be 20 feet in the air when it happened.

"Look, Kagome. I'm sorry, but I...I don't want you as my mate. We're friends, that's all we are. That's all we shoulda _ever_ been."

Her face turned red, then purple. "Why, I..you can't..what the hell?!"

He thought about the youkai, and for the first time, he said it out loud. "I want Sesshomaru to be my mate - I want to spend the rest of my life with him."

Holy _fuck_, that had felt good to say!

"SIT!" He barely flinched when he was slammed into the ground. Some time later, after many more 'sit' commands, he watched from his crater as Kagome walked away.

She_ was_ kinda irritating with these damn Beads, using them to control him, and he spoke inside his mind. _Hey, you there?_

_**Hmm?**_

_Why would you pick _her_ over Sesshomaru?_

He could've sworn he sensed a shrug. _**She was willing.**_

_Well, don't do it again! I don't care if we defeat fuckin' _Naraku! _I don't want her!_

_**Fine.**_

Kagome staggered out of the camp oblivious to Sango following her and fell to her knees behind a stand of trees sobbing. Sango wrapped her arms around her a minute later. She struggled a bit before giving in and crying on Sango's shoulder.

"H-how could he? I-I was a..." sobs wracked her body while Sango rubbed her back silently, it wasn't a time for I told you so. "I was a virgin. I thought...oh god I th-thought he l-loved me."

XxXx

Sesshomaru meanwhile was enroute to Totosai. He needed to get away from the pack and this was something he'd been wanting to do since he'd lost his whip.

It only took a matter of hours by flight to reach the swordsmith's home. As he landed on the hot, blackened ground of Totosai's 'yard', Momo bellowed in fear.

Totosai poked his head out and immediately began defending himself. "I haven't done anything lately, you whelp!"

Sesshomaru realized that a few months ago, the name would've resulted in an attack. Now, though, it didn't seem like a big deal. "Calm yourself, old man. I am not here to kill you...this time."

"W-what do you want?"

"I seek a light weight armor for my right arm and a sword, preferably with a ranged attack that won't feed demonic entities no matter how powerful."

"Well the sword will be easy enough if you can bring me the fangs of a hundred demons, though why you want three swords for one ar...at any rate do I look like an armor smith?" he changed the topic as the demon seemed about to revise his earlier assertion.

"I will acquire the fangs. Might you know where there is a skilled armor smith or are you useless for anything but sword making?"

"West of here, Sutīrupurinsu, has metal replacements for one arm and leg you can't miss him," Totosai said deciding to take the comment as a backhanded compliment, safer that way. Sesshomaru's eyes widened, his anger forgotten and his plans changed drastically.

But first, he still needed the hundred demons' fangs. After that he would go see the demon Totosai had mentioned.

XxXx

Inuyasha couldn't have cheered up if he'd tried. Sesshomaru had been gone for nearly 2 days now. Of course the youkai hadn't told him where he was going or how long he'd be gone.

_**The things he would tell a mate?**_

_Fuck. Off._

The demon's voice was undaunted, teasing him as it had since the other night. _**Don't you mean fuck **_**him**_**?**_

Inuyasha shook his head. _I hate you._

_**I know.**_

Koga had shown far less antagonism since Inuyasha mastered his demon and had been playing scout for the pack. Inuyasha perked up as he felt the speedster rush into camp. It was a good thing he'd turned out to actually be tolerable because neither Sango nor Kagome would speak to him and Miroku was avoiding him to appease Sango, though he'd occasionally give him a sympathetic look.

"I have a lead," Koga said with a grin.

"Thank the gods," Inuyasha muttered, then out loud, "Alright, let's go!"

He could smell the reluctance to obey, yet relief for a distraction. Frustrated, he barely kept himself from growling and snapping. He managed to say calmly, "If you guys don't wanna come, then stay here. Me and Wolf-boy can check this out."

Unwilling to abandon Inuyasha even if he was being a complete dick the others followed and a panting Ginta and Hakkaku joined them as they all followed Koga.

Inuyasha feel a strange sort of restlessness and anxiety increasing as they drew closer to whatever Koga had found and after a while he realized that he was nervous. He'd grown used to going into battle with Sesshomaru and the realization that he was basically fucked if he fell today brought a fear he hadn't felt before.

_**Focus. If you fear, you **_**will**_** fall. You fought for decades without him, you can do so once again**_.

For once that bastard had something useful to say. Inuyasha sighed and shook himself out, feeling better _Why are you helping?_

_**If you actually fall, I fall, too.**_

_Good point._

It took them a full day to reach the miasma encrusted mountain that Koga had found.

"Shall we camp here for the night?" nods went around the group.

"I'll hunt if you want to keep an eye on things?" Koga offered.

Inuyasha hesitated, then spoke low enough for only the demon to hear. "Actually, I think I'd rather hunt. Kagome's pissed that I chose Sesshomaru , and she's kinda turning everyone against me. Maybe...maybe you can smooth things out?"

The wolf nodded sympathetically. "I've seen this happen before, someone picks a mate and the pack doesn't approve. I'll do what I can, Ok?"

Inuyasha smiled for the first time in days. "Thanks. I'll owe you big if you can at least lower the hostility."

XxXx

Sesshomaru dropped off the fangs taken from the most powerful demons he could find with a preference for range, then headed west as fast as he could go. It didn't take long for him to find the demon in question.

"You are Sutīrupurinsu?"

"I am," the demon replied. He looked Sesshomaru over, "You want a replacement?" he said without preamble.

"If it's possible," Sesshomaru replied trying not to be too hopeful even in his own head, there were too many things that could go wrong.

"It is but it will cost you."

Sesshomaru nodded - he had already figured there'd be a payment exacted. "What do you require? Treasure? Land? Blood?"

"As you can see I'm no longer truly flesh. I find the concept of pain fascinating," the demon smiled revealing that its teeth had been replaced by steel fangs.

Sesshomaru glared, "I wish to _repair_ my body."

"Oh rest assured," The demon disappeared into his hut and exited wielding a branding iron and a long wire whip. "There'll be no permanent damage."

Sesshomaru nodded, "Make it first I want to be certain it will suit my purposes."

"Then you will kill me."

"I assure you I keep my word."

The demon shook its head, "If I break my word you can kill me I cannot say the same."

"You can't be assured that the final product is suitable."

"I haven't failed yet."

Sesshomaru allowed a slight smile at that, he trusted that kind of pride in one's craft, "We have an accord."

XxXx

Inuyasha took his time hunting, praying to whatever god was listening that Koga could turn the tide.

He'd brought down two deer for everyone else and a small feline for himself. He rolled his eyes at himself. The only reason he'd gotten the cat was because it made him think of his brother.

_**You **_**do**_** realize you have no guarantee he's coming back, right?**_

Inuyasha froze. "He'll come back," he whispered out loud.

_**What-the fuck-ever. Bored. Let's get some.**_

_I already told you, Kagome is off limits._

He got the oddest impression of someone rolling over. _**That wolf is attractive.**_

Inuyasha gasped. "Oh gods, do _not_ even think that!"

The demonic beast within him continued, _**He's strong, but would submit to me; you saw how he acted when you showed him you had control.**_

Inuyasha clamped his jaw shut, chanting in his mind, _Shut up, shut up, shutupshutupshutup_.

He reached camp and was about to drop the deer off and retreat so he could avoid Koga, when the wolf stopped him. _Fuck. _

_**Indeed. **_

_Shut the fuck up!_

The wolf smiled, tail waving and unaware of Inuyasha's inner argument. "So Kagome's still pissed that you didn't choose her, but she's willing to let it go after she's had some time to cool down. I'd avoid her for now."

_**Such a helpful little morsel.**_

"Sango and Miroku are both ok with you. Shippo's just glad it's over for now."

Inuyasha nodded, forcing a smile. "Thanks, Wolf-boy. You...did good."

Oh man, that tail did _not_ just start waving faster!

_**Oh look at that. I'm not even out and your praise pleases him.**_

Koga nodded, helpfully taking the deer. Then he glanced at the cat, and his tail slowed down. "He'll be back, mutt."

Inuyasha nodded and left with his own meal.

XxXx

Sesshomaru bit off a scream and his body fell back to the stone table he was strapped to as his muscles relaxed. The demon put away his implements and undid the straps. Sesshomaru forced himself to his feet with only a wince and a bit of stiffness. With effort he kept his stride as graceful as possible as he followed the demon into the hut. He wanted that table out of sight.

The demon looked back, obviously impressed, he ignored it focusing on getting his panting under control. Every muscle ached from hours of tension and at least one hour of outright writhing and blood dripped from hundreds of small wounds.

"Leave."

"What?" Sesshomaru asked his mind spending most of its energy on fighting the pain.

"I can't work with you looking over my shoulder."

Sesshomaru nodded, smelling the guilt and suspecting that the demon was just giving him a chance to heal but for once he took the out.

He found a suitable tree on the far side of the hut to rest and let his healing ability go to work.

XxXx

Sango sat with an arm wrapped around Kagome, Kagome's head was on her shoulder her breath distracting against Sango's neck.

"How did things get to this point?" Kagome asked.

Sango had been wondering that since Kohaku had fallen under Naraku's control. "It's just life," she answered sadly.

XxXx

Inuyasha perched on a low branch just outside of camp. He looked up at the heinous mountain, wondering if he were making the right choice.

He'd delayed the pack's advance, claiming he wanted to make sure they didn't rush into a trap. In reality, he was waiting for a certain youkai.

If this turned out to be a real confrontation with Naraku, he was quite sure that Sesshomaru would want to be present. A small part of his mind that he didn't want to acknowledge was quite sure _he_ wanted the warrior present.

XxXx

Sesshomaru tested out the new arm, holes had been created in it strategically like blood grooves to lighten the weight as he specified. Claws tipped the hand, a perfect match for his real one though missing the poison.

"I told you I never fail," the demon said with a metallic smile as Sesshomaru tested the weight with a few acrobatic moves. It would take some training to get used to but it wouldn't slow him much, only a few pounds heavier than a natural limb. He drew Tokijin and Tenseiga. The movements were clumsy by his standards but centuries of training beat a year of rust and he'd be back on form in no time.

"Your confidence is...justified," he said and the demon beamed. By nightfall he was at Totosai's to pick up his new sword.

He examined its blade, so black it looked like a blade shaped void except for a stripe of dull blue down the center.

"It's called Gekko but it's not ready yet. It needs the blessing of a Miko, until then it is merely a pretty sword." Sesshomaru clenched his jaw but went on his way without a word. He found himself thinking about what kind of trouble Inu-pup had gotten up to even though he shouldn't give a damn. His visible wounds were long since healed and he pushed for speed despite the lingering stiffness and his intention of taking a few days to shake the rust off his left hand skills.

He slowed when he got close enough to smell that the whole pack was together and unwounded. He had no intention of revealing his concern or even talking to Inuyasha. So he went straight to Rin when he entered camp.

He could smell anger and envy, and narrowed the scent down to Kagome. He decided to ignore her - her issues were not his problem.

Mostly hidden by his sleeve, the new arm was not immediately noticeable. Rin was extremely observant, though.

"Oh Lord Sesshomaru!" she exclaimed, reaching for the shiny hand. He carefully pulled it out of reach, uncertain of his fine control just yet. As he pulled his arm up, the sleeve slid back, exposing his new limb.

Gasps surrounded him, and he sensed curiosity and knew questions would follow. "I found a replacement," he said simply but firmly.

XxXx

Inuyasha was staring, and couldn't stop. The new arm was magnificent, even at this distance he could see the steel replicas of the youkai's lethal claws. And the metal had slight curves in it where muscles would be.  
It was a work of art.

Inuyasha swallowed. If Sesshomaru was dangerous with one arm, how deadly was he now?

Sesshomaru could feel Inuyasha's eyes on him and now that he knew the pup was safe, ignored him in disgust.

"You've been working on your back-cut?" he asked, firmly ignoring the yipping of the pack.

Rin nodded emphatically, "Care to join me?" he asked with a slight smile.

Rin beamed - he'd never asked before, it'd always been an instruction. He led her a safe distance away and drew Gekko, left handed, remembering that he would need to find a Miko to finish the blade. It didn't matter for the moment. He moved through some basic forms, good for shaking off the rust and with the added benefit that Rin could follow. _This_ was contentment, Inuyasha could fuck himself, quite literally as far as he was concerned.

Inuyasha wanted to whine with the pain of being so absolutely disregarded.

**_You've really got it bad for him._**

He didn't even have the heart to reply, and crept out of camp to lick his wounds in private.

XxXx

Koga was at a loss. Sesshomaru was back, but had ignored Inuyasha with a deliberateness that only an idiot could miss.

Geez, he figured the youkai had been hurt by Inuyasha fucking around, but to shun him in front of everyone?

He watched as his friend crept out of camp like a whipped pup, smelling heavily of grief and hurt.

Then Koga realized that Inuyasha had cut Kagome off the same night Sesshomaru had left. Well, fuck. So Sesshomaru didn't know that his brother had chosen him.. Koga winced at the memory of a dozen 'sit' commands, Inuyasha's body hitting the ground again and again.

Sesshomaru needed to know.

* * *

Google can be a dick about translations.

Sutīrupurinsu=steel prince (I believe this is in katakana)  
Gekko=moonlight (Kanji I think)  
Ko gyoko=anticoagulation (Kanji again I think)


	8. A Little Trip, A Lotta Trouble

Time's A/N Sesh is an amazing collab partner and friend, I'm very lucky.

Sesh's a/n Time is awesome and likes to make me blush :)

Also one of my best friends got me a laptop! This means that as soon as it's all set up and I can go to the library in the next town to leech off of their faster WiFi things should really be moving along! *so excited*

L. Lileae - sorry that twist felt forced, but it was meant as Inuyasha's demon is the horny one. That demonic bastard is trouble.

Chapter 8: A Little Trip, A Lotta Trouble

* * *

Previously -_ ((Then Koga realized that Inuyasha had cut Kagome off the same night Sesshomaru had left. Well, fuck. So Sesshomaru didn't know that his brother had chosen him.. Koga winced at the memory of a dozen 'sit' commands, Inuyasha's body hitting the ground again and again._

_Sesshomaru needed to know.))_

_._

Koga waited for a while, god how long was he going to practice? Rin had long since sat down and was watching in awe as the demon dual wielded Tokijin and the new black sword. He clearly wasn't familiar with the style but then Koga supposed that was kind of the point of practice. Finally he sheathed the swords and Koga approached.

"Hey...uh, " he wondered for a moment if not using a title would get him killed but he'd never used a title for anyone so..."Inuyasha told Kagome to fuck off so you know..." he gestured vaguely.

Sesshomaru nodded. That was...good to know but it wasn't why he was angry and it wasn't why he was avoiding Inuyasha.

Koga bit his lip when the older demon didn't seem necessarily moved by what he'd said. Remembering the scent of devastation rolling off the pup, he blurted, "He's really hurt that you ignored him!"

He thought he might've seen a twitch, but it was probably the wind or a trick of the light. "Look, it's really none of my business, and I don't know what happened between you two before you left. But he told Kagome he wants to spend his life with you. She 'sat' him at least a dozen times. And he's been moping ever since that night."

The taller male didn't react at all.

Koga sighed. "I know he's a dumbass sometimes, and he needs better control of his demon side. But I think he might be in love with you."

_That_ finally seemed to get a reaction. Frozen amber eyes met his, and Sesshomaru spoke quietly. "You _think_ he _might_ be? You should not speak on things you are not certain of."

Koga frowned. "Ok, fine. The love part, I'm not sure. But everything else was fact."

He spun away and marched off. If the demon lord was gonna be like that, he'd just go comfort his friend himself.

X

Inuyasha sighed as he smelled Koga approach and hastily got himself under control.

"Hey Inuyasha," Koga called gently.

"What d'ya want?" he asked thickly.

"Thought ya' might want some company."

Inuyasha grunted, "You were right...he t-totally hates me." _and with good reason_.

Koga bit his lip as he slowly sat down next to the hanyou. "Inuyasha, I don't think he _hates_ you. He's just...being him?"

Uggh, he was _not_ cut out for this!

X

Inuyasha sighed and rested his chin on his knees. "My demon is an asshole. He fucked everything up."

**_Let's fuck _****him****_ up._**

_Go to Hell._

**_Been there, done that._**

Inuyasha shook his head, seeing that Koga watched him curiously. "I'll never be able to undo what I did. And if I use my demon side again, I might...well, I might mess up again."

Koga huffed, gave up and cuffed Inuyasha upside the head, "Snap out of it. If you want something don't you always fight for it? Why're ya' just sittin' here moping - go do something about it!"

Inuyasha growled, ears laying back aggressively. "Watch it, mangy wolf. I'm not 'moping'. And what the fuck am I supposed to do? This ain't a battle I know how to fight!"

He sucked in a breath at the truth of that. He had always fought for what he wanted, true. But he didn't know how to win this war.

"Have you tried talking to him...or godforbid apologizing?" Koga asked sarcastically.

Inuyasha opened his mouth to retort, but paused.

_Had_ he apologized? Huh. Well, even if he had, it couldn't hurt to try again, right?

"Thanks, wolf-boy."

Koga nodded. "And work on controlling that demon inside you. An apology definitely won't be enough if you hit on Kagome again while blooded."

Inuyasha shook his head. "I already told him not to mess with her again."

He turned and headed for the other side of camp, following the scent of youkai and steel.

XxXx

Rin was sleeping under Sesshomaru's new arm nuzzling the metal hand, it couldn't have been comfortable but she'd wanted to and he was confident that if he held still he wouldn't accidentally hurt her. He smelled Inuyasha but didn't look up.

That thought made him think of Kagome and from there Gekko. He doubted Kagome would give the blessing and had no desire to ask nor did he much want to speak to the woman who'd imprisoned Inuyasha. Who was that healer they were always going on about?

Inuyasha hesitated; Sesshomaru surely had to know he was there, but made no move to acknowledge his presence. Cautiously, he moved to the youkai's right side and sat in his range of vision, though the golden eyes remained focused elsewhere, seemingly on a tree, rather than him.

He took a deep breath and spoke softly, not wanting to wake Rin. "Hey there. Umm, so you got a new arm _and_ a new sword, huh?"

No response.

"Uhh, well, that's cool. What's the sword called?"

Finally, Sesshomaru murmured, "Gekko."

Inuyasha nodded, ridiculously relieved by the one-word answer. "Ok cool. That's a good name. Umm, does it have any abilities?"

His brother replied quietly, "Not yet."

He tilted his head curiously. "'Yet'?"

Sesshomaru inclined his head, still not quite looking at him. "It needs to be blessed by a miko. I'm not sure _your_ priestess will do so."

Inuyasha winced, ok he'd had that coming. "She's not mine. I told her we're just friends, and that I wanted to...be with you. And I told my demon not to mess with her again, no matter how...frisky I get after a battle, even if we defeat Naraku."

Sesshomaru finally, _finally_, met his eyes. "And its response to that?"

Inuyasha ventured a smile. "He agreed. There won't be any more..uhh...mishaps with Kagome."

The older canine nodded. "That is...good to hear. But I can assume she certainly will not bless my sword, then?"

Inuyasha made a face. "Yeah, not likely."

Sesshomaru continued, "Tell me, what is the name of the old healer priestess you and the others often mention?"

Inuyasha cocked his head. "Kaede? Yeah, she's got the power to do it, I bet. She lives in a village about…3 days from here. I can go with you so she knows we're good? I don't know if she'd bless it if she thought you plan to use it against me."

"A good idea." Sesshomaru could be assured that no one would move on the mountain if Inuyasha was away as well.

On the other hand he didn't really want to spend an extended period of time with Inuyasha and from the smell of eagerness, Inuyasha was looking forward to just that. He was less bothered that Inuyasha had hurt him than by the fact that it _had _hurt. That and though Inuyasha had said nothing, he had a nose, he had to know exactly why the great Sesshomaru went slinking off tail between his legs.

At least he knew what side of the scale he was on now. If he made a good showing on that mountain maybe he'd have Inuyasha's respect back.

Inuyasha tried to contain his eagerness. He and Sesshomaru would be going on a journey, albeit a small one, together. Just the two of them.

He could sense reluctance from the demon, but he had hope that on their trip they could...bond or get to know each other better. He wasn't really sure _what_ would occur, but he was sure that this could be good for them.

Sesshomaru extricated himself from Rin and rose, ignoring the various aches. "Now?"

Inuyasha nodded, "Now is fine. I'll let the pack know."

He left his brother to go inform the others. He decided to tell Koga first; maybe the wolf could tell the others. Once he had explained, Koga nodded in understanding. "Well, it's not like that mountain is going anywhere."

Then his friend lowered his voice. "You and him are going alone?"

Inuyasha nodded, ignoring the feel of a blush creeping over his face. He turned away before Koga could tease him, and found Sesshomaru depositing Rin with Jaken and Ah-Un.

The youkai met his eyes, and Inuyasha smiled. "Let's go."

Then he remembered, "Oh right we're attacking the mountain when we get back**."**

No response.

"Not talking to me again?"

"The obvious doesn't require my attention," there was a mountain covered with miasma that smelled of Naraku, of _course_ Inuyasha would attack it, he'd never back down from so tempting a target.

XxXx

This was slow. Ridiculously slow, how did Inuyasha ever get anything done trotting around on foot? If only...

"Inuyasha, have you tried to light-travel since you mastered your demon?"

Inuyasha blinked. "Like that ball-of-light thing you do? I can't do that...can I?"

Sesshomaru frowned. "It's possible. There is only one way to find out. You will have to be demonized to try."

Inuyasha focused inward. _Hey?_

**Now **_**you wanna talk?**_

_Don't be a dick. Can we do this or not?_

For the first time, he sensed hesitation. **_I...don't know. Like he said, only way is to try._**

_Ok then._

Returning to the outside world, he saw Sesshomaru gazing at him, waiting. He nodded at the youkai as he called his demonic nature forward. **"Ok, I'll try. Uhhh...what do I do?"**

Sesshomaru seemed to be caught off-guard by the question. "Hmm, I do it without thinking. But I had to learn at one point."

Inuyasha waited while his brother looked thoughtful. Finally, Sesshomaru nodded. "Ok. First, you focus your energy in your core. Imagine a light spreading from that spot, consuming you."

Sesshomaru reached out and laid a hand just above Inuyasha's stomach. "Here. Focus here."

Inuyasha pressed his lips together hard. _You mean where you put your hand through me?_

Sesshomaru inhaled deeply, then pulled his hand away. "On an unrelated note, it is unwise to try to seek a mate in someone you are afraid of and angry at."

Inuyasha simply nodded and focused on focusing. A few moments later, his body started to glow, and his feet left the ground. Startled, he yelped and thrashed, breaking his focus. He landed on his feet, panting.

"Hmm, hmm."

**"Shut up. 'S not funny."** But the sound of his brother laughing made him feel warm inside.

He closed his eyes and focused again.

This time he rose twenty feet before realizing that his body wasn't responding to him the way it did when he leaped though the air, panicking he again lost focus and fell with a decidedly unmanly yelp.

"I didn't know you shrieked," Sesshomaru said though it lacked the contempt it would have had once. Still this was amusing and somewhat making up for his wounded pride.

**"I didn't shriek,"** Inuyasha huffed, trying again.

"Yeah you did."

**"You're a son of a bitch you know that right?"**

"Intimately," and _there_ was a set of memories he wasn't exploring anytime soon**.**

Inuyasha transformed into light, shot forward through the air and smack into a tree.

Taking a small amount of pity on the pup Sesshomaru relented knowing Inuyasha would kill himself trying to master the technique, "Try to lean left and right to direct it; even though you don't have a physical body you'll move. 'Leaning' back or forward controls speed, 'jumping' and 'crouching' height."

Inuyasha shook his head to clear it, running through the new instructions. He was getting worn out - seemed that drawback hadn't faded with gaining control. Any length of time demonized was still taking its toll.

He managed to transform and control it for some time. He landed, panting as his demon form receded. Sesshomaru gave an approving nod. "You picked up on it quickly. We shall travel that way and it'll be much faster."

Inuyasha nodded and tried to transform again.

Nothing happened.  
_  
Hey! You quitting on me?_

He sensed the demon stirring sluggishly. **_Fuck off. That was _****exhausting****_!_**

Well fuck.

He avoided his brother's eyes, feeling guilty and weak for having to delay them further. "I...I can't right now. It wore us out."

He heard Sesshomaru give a frustrated sigh, and his ears laid back. He hadn't meant to make him mad.

It was quiet for a few minutes, then he heard the youkai sigh again. "Look at me, Inu-pup."

He met the golden eyes as Sesshomaru spoke. "You need to build up your endurance as a demon. If a battle that depended on your demon side lasted too long, you would be, in your language, 'fucked'."

He nodded meekly, knowing the older male was right.

Sesshomaru moved to sit against a nearby tree. "We will rest here until you recover."

Inuyasha nodded again, looking around for his own spot to rest.

To his surprise, his brother motioned him over. "You may rest with me."

Delighted, but knowing a wrong move would result in the offer being rescinded, Inuyasha quietly went to the youkai's right side and sat close, resting his head against the fluff.

He was asleep almost immediately.

Inuyasha woke several hours later and raised his head. "Stay here," Sesshomaru said, actively not-thinking about how it felt waking up like that or to have Inuyasha so comfortable with him, lost respect or not. He returned a few minutes later with a few rabbits.

"Eat then we'll move on."

Feeling like he was starving, Inuyasha ate his share quickly, only vaguely registering something curious in Sesshomaru's scent.

Once he was done, he rose and shook himself. "Ok. I'm ready."

He called his blood forth, then he and his brother transformed into balls of light and flew towards Kaede's village.

Touching down in the village Sesshomaru followed Inuyasha to a small hut. Inuyasha put on his most innocent 'goodboy' look and knocked.

"Ah what did you do now? I swear you young..." Kaede trailed off as she saw Inuyasha's companion. "What is this about?"

Sesshomaru watched as Inuyasha smiled rather warmly at the old human. "Hey, Kaede. Been awhile. Uhh, this is my brother, Sesshomaru - you've heard us mention him before?"

From the wary look that one eye gave him, Sesshomaru knew she had indeed heard about him. "Aye, I remember ye mentioning him a time or two."

He nodded respectfully; while her age was a fraction of his own, she was an elder of her race. And likely the only one who would bless Gekko. "Greetings."

Seeming surprised, she stared for a moment before nodding back. "And to ye as well."

She looked at Inuyasha, her expression of 'you're going to explain this' clear as day. "Ah well, come inside, the both of ye."

Sesshomaru glared - one nice thing about Totosai was he could be threatened into doing more or less anything. He suspected that wouldn't work nearly as well with the old woman and anyway Inuyasha would fight to the death over it so he let the pup take the lead.

"Sesshomaru has a new sword but it needs a miko's blessing to obtain its full power."

"Ah may I see the sword?" Sesshomaru handed her the sword in its scabbard and she pulled it out to examine it.

Kaede examined the blade carefully. "Why does a demon blade require the blessing of a priestess?"

Sesshomaru frowned. "I am not sure. I've never heard of such. But the swordsmith said it was needed."

Kaede nodded. "I'm afraid I will need several hours, mayhap the day. There are many blessings for weapons, and it will take time to discern which one will be most suitable."

Sesshomaru closed his eyes and held back a sigh. He sensed Inuyasha stand. "Ok, that's fine. You do your thing, old woman."

He heard the affection in the words and opened his eyes, surprised by a strange tugging in his chest. Inuyasha was smiling at the priestess, and she was smiling back.

"Must you _always_ treat an old woman thus?"

Inuyasha chuckled, then turned to him, still smiling warmly. "Hey I know you don't wanna wait, but ...maybe we can go fishing or something?"

Sesshomaru felt a creeping warmth in his belly, but ignored it. "Very well."

He rose and followed Inuyasha outside. They headed down to the nearby river, seeing a group of children already fishing with lines. Immediately, several kids ran to Inuyasha, tugging on his hands and clothes.

"Inuyasha, Inuyasha! You're back! Where are the others?"

A smaller girl, barely older than a toddler, jumped determinedly against the hanyou's leg. "Nu-asha! Up!"

Sesshomaru watched as Inuyasha picked up the demanding little thing and held her in one arm, using his free hand to ruffle the other kids' hair while he answered the questions they were firing at him.

This was a side of his brother he hadn't known. He was obviously good with Rin and Shippo, but he hadn't known that'd extend to other youngsters.

At that moment, the little human in Inuyasha's arm spotted him, mouth dropping open as her eyes rounded. "Nu-asha? Who dat?"

The other kids noticed him and stared for a moment before crowding behind Inuyasha, who smiled and pitched his voice low. "Scary bastard."

Then out loud he said, "It's alright guys. This is my brother, Sesshomaru. He's not a _bad_ demon, but let's not annoy him, ok?"

The children nodded and gave him shy little waves of greeting, to which he nodded back. Then a boy caught Inuyasha's free hand. "Hey, Inuyasha! The fish haven't been biting and we're all trying to get some for dinner. Can you help?"

Inuyasha grinned, baring his fangs. "Sure I can."

The little girl patted a faint cheek stripe. "Nu-asha? These?"

Again, her observation caught the other children's attention. They ooh'ed and ahh'ed over the new stripes. Inuyasha crouched down so they could touch. When their curiosity had been satisfied, he handed the girl to an older child and stepped into the river.

Within 10 minutes, he'd gotten a big fish or 2 for each family represented by the kids. As they scattered with their gifts, Inuyasha smiled at Sesshomaru, gesturing him to the edge of the water, then swiping out a couple of huge ones. Sesshomaru snatched the fish out of the air as they flew towards him.

"One's for us, one's for Kaede," his brother said as he left the river. They dropped off Kaede's, then sat on the grass to eat theirs.

Villagers passed by, waving at Inuyasha. They eyed Sesshomaru a bit warily, but nodded politely. Apparently, he wasn't too big of a threat in their minds if Inuyasha was comfortable with him.

Over the next few hours, Sesshomaru witnessed a very different Inuyasha than the one he knew. The hanyou was asked to help with building a hut, and Inuyasha was soon doing the work of 3 men, shirtless and with his hair tied back.

Then some horses broke out of the corral, and Inuyasha helped round them up.

By the time the sun was setting and Inuyasha's sharp ears heard Kaede calling, Sesshomaru had an altogether different picture of the annoying hanyou.

Kaede showed them the blade. It seemed to glow, the black steel gleaming and the previously dull blue stripe now a shining sapphire. Sesshomaru nodded as he took the weapon, feeling pure power radiating from it.

"You have my thanks."

Inuyasha asked, "So what kinda blessing worked?"

Kaede hesitated. "I tried so many, but the only one to get a reaction was one of protection. I had asked for power, and victory over enemies, and several others I thought suited ye, Sesshomaru. But there was no answer. Finally, in desperation, I tried asking for it to always protect others, and the power flooded it."

Sesshomaru gazed at the blade. So it wanted to protect like Tetsusaiga? Hmm. Until recently, he would've scorned the idea. Now...it didn't seem like such a bad thing.

Sesshomaru spun the sword in his steel arm and smiled slightly, it felt lighter and more responsive. A thought occurred to him and he slid back the sleeve on his right arm and ran the blade across the skin. It didn't leave a mark.

He lashed out and caught Inuyasha by surprise on the leg, checking his swing just in case.

"Arr...huh?" Inuyasha grunted anger replaced by confusion.

"Protection. It seems it's incapable of harming anyone I do not wish it to," the thought pleased him as he remembered Rin's terror. He walked out of the hut. He wanted to see what else Gekko was capable of and there was a mountain full of enemies calling out for steel.

As they left the village, Inuyasha prepared to call his demon side out so he could transform into the light, but Sesshomaru stopped him. "We can travel like that in a bit. We did eat the fish not long ago. We should walk that off first."

Inuyasha was confused; it'd been a few hours since they are and he felt like he'd digested the meal. But if his brother wanted to walk, that was fine.

Sesshomaru glanced over at his brother, curious at his own desire to simply walk for a while. But seeing Inuyasha in the village had been an experience, and now, in the quiet, he found the younger male's company relaxing.

They walked in silence for some time, following a small stream that reflected the rising moon. Inuyasha realized it was waning, and cursed softly. When Sesshomaru looked at him, he explained. "We're gonna have to wait another night to attack the mountain."

The youkai frowned, and he sighed as he pointed at the moon. "Tomorrow night is the new moon. That means my abilities are gonna be screwed up tomorrow. I'm sorry."

Sesshomaru shook his head. "Do not apologize. You cannot help it. I would rather you have said something now, than us attack the mountain and you fall because you didn't."

Inuyasha's ears pricked forward. But the older male had already returned to silence. Sesshomaru's words from before came back to him _'If you feel the same consider your offer accepted.'_

He swallowed and continued walking next to the taller canine.

"I said it's not your fault," Sesshomaru said a bit harshly.

"What?"

"You smell of guilt."

Inuyasha flinched at the terse statement, though his brother had completely misinterpreted. The memory of the gentle words, easing his pain when he'd felt like absolute shit had come with a reminder of why Sesshomaru had left.

He hesitated, not wanting to say that and risk derailing any progress they had made. "It's not that, it's...something else."

"Well?"

Inuyasha was trying to think of how to answer, when a soft singing reached his ears. He looked up the path; there, kneeling at the edge of the stream, was a woman. She looked up as they approached, luminous silver eyes with slitted pupils focusing on them.

Inuyasha felt his ears tilting back as the hair on the back of his neck stood on end. Something wasn't quite right.

He sniffed the air, a knot forming in his stomach.

"Sesshomaru, she doesn't have a scent."

"I can tell."

The woman rose and seemed to drift into their path, long black hair floating around her as if she were underwater. "Hello."

Inuyasha's instinct was to respond politely. "Hel-"

Sesshomaru cut him off. "Stand aside."

Those intense mercury eyes narrowed a bit, and Inuyasha was struck with a feeling of foreboding. "C'mon, Sesshomaru. We can go another way."

But the demon lord was flying his arrogance flag high tonight. He stepped forward, clawed hand wrapping around Tokijin's hilt. "I said, stand aside. You're in the way."

Inuyasha took a step back as the woman seemed to flicker, then appeared nearly in front of him. "Such hubris. Why would you want this one as a mate, Inuyasha?"

He blinked. "How-?"

She laughed softly. "I know many things."

Sesshomaru stepped between them with a growl. "What is your business with us?"

The woman drifted around him to come to Inuyasha's side again. "I like you. Him, not so much. You know that hateful arrogant crap is a cover, right?"

Tokijin sliced through empty air.

Inuyasha cried out, "No, don't attack her!"

A few feet away, the woman folded her arms. "Sesshomaru, you really don't deserve such a sweet, smart mate. Inuyasha could sense something wasn't right, and he is trying to warn you. You won't listen, because you _always_ think you know better."

The youkai raised Tokijin and pointed it at her. "Do not speak as if you know me!"

Suddenly, the woman was inside Sesshomaru's guard. "But I do know you. I know _everything_. And I'm going to do your little brother a favor."

Inuyasha stared as Sesshomaru leapt back, but the strange woman stayed inside his guard as if she were welded to his armor. She laid her hands on his face and laid a brief kiss on his lips.

The next moment, she was in front of Inuyasha, leaning close. A cool sensation brushed his lips as she kissed him, then smiled, whispering, "Don't be afraid of what's happening."

Then she was gone.


	9. The Spell

Chapter 9: The Spell

A/n TRIGGER WARNING! nightmares, non-canon-typical violence, past abuse. This warning extends to ch10 as well.

* * *

_((Inuyasha stared as Sesshomaru leapt back, but the strange woman stayed inside his guard as if she were welded to his armor. She laid her hands on his face and laid a brief kiss on his lips._

_The next moment, she was in front of Inuyasha, leaning close. A cool sensation brushed his lips as she kissed him, then smiled, whispering, "Don't be afraid of what's happening."_

_Then she was gone.))_

"What the hell were you doing? She didn't do anything to deserve that." Inuyasha demanded.

"When has that mattered?"

"What the hell's with you tonight?" Inuyasha cried, shocked and then mad at himself for being surprised. The witch was right - he'd always be an arrogant bastard.

"It's only arrogance if you can't follow through," Sesshomaru replied. After everything he'd gone through to get his new weapons the woman had still handled him like a pup. The confidence he'd regained since his sojourn was shattered and he was itching for something to take it out on, daring Inuyasha to draw on him. God no matter how hard he tried to get more powerful, he was still worthless and he'd questioned why Inuyasha received Tetsusaiga?

Sesshomaru saw Inuyasha tense. "Tetsusaiga again? I thought you let that shit go!"

He was taken aback, sure he hadn't spoken aloud.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes and he heard his brother's voice, echoing oddly. "Great, doesn't even know when he's talking. He's finally snapped."

He growled, "I have not 'snapped'."

Inuyasha's eyes flew wide, voice echoing again. "What did he just say?"

Sesshomaru blinked. Inuyasha's lips hadn't moved.

X

Inuyasha frowned. "I didn't say anything - why would my lips move?"

He heard Sesshomaru's voice, less sharp then usual and seeming to vibrate in his ears. "Inu-pup?"

Man, even when he was mad at the asshole, 'Inu-pup' always got him.

"Inuyasha, I did not say that out loud."

He blinked. "What?"

The youkai's voice came, vibrating again. "Inuyasha can ...can you hear me?"

Inuyasha frowned. "Of course I can hear you! What's your problem?"

He smelled the oddest scent of panic in his brother's scent. "Inuyasha I need you to think of...a color. Think of a color but don't say it out loud."

"You're being really fucking weird right now."

"Just do it!"

"Ok, ok! Sheesh, pushy fucker."

He cast about for a color, then spotted the moonlight shining off of that long silver hair. Silver. Gods that color was pretty.

"My hair is not 'pretty'."

Inuyasha sucked in a breath. "What the fuck did you just say?"

"You thought the moonlight reflecting off my hair was 'pretty'" Sesshomaru replied calmly to make his point. They could hear each other's thoughts? That was bad, anger and panic coursed through him and he pushed both aside trying to think of absolutely nothing. That wasn't particularly effective since it involved thinking about what he didn't want to think about, so he decided to focus on safe things like Gekko.

Gekko he liked Gekko. Why? Three swords, two arms and Ko gyoko and he was still fucking worthless. Why did he even bother it was like...Okay bad idea. He broke off those thoughts and went back to just thinking 'nothing'

A sense of panic and confusion washed over him, and he realized it was not his own. Inuyasha was staring at him, ears twitching nervously, almost flailing on top of his head.

Sesshomaru sensed a swirling bundle of thoughts, like several Inuyashas talking at once. _That _was disturbing.

_Ohgodsplease pleasepleaseno don't let him see in my head' 'Ok, think of nothing! No that won't work. Umm shit whatever you do, don't think about bad stuff!'_

Then a rough voice he recognized pierced the mental ramblings. **_'What the _****fuck** **_is he doing in our head?!'  
_**  
Sesshomaru's eyes widened - Inuyasha's demon really did literally speak.

A snarl filled his head. **_'It's none of your fuckin' business! Get out!'_**

He shook his head as he felt a sensation of being pushed, and he spoke out loud. "Inuyasha, maybe we should try to get some sleep. This is...exhausting."

Inuyasha nodded, watching him warily. "Yeah, ok. You're right, it is."

Sesshomaru sat next to a tree, carefully thinking of safer things like hunting and minor battles. Inuyasha seemed to wait for a few moments before leaping into a different tree.

A feeling of sadness passed through him, and he blinked as Inuyasha's voice came like a whisper. _'He didn't invite me to rest with him. Bet he hates being in a half-breed's head.'_

Sesshomaru glanced up at the tree. "Inu-pup, I no longer think of you like that."

In the faint moonlight, he saw golden eyes peer down at him. "Look, you don't want _me_ in _your_ head, so try to stay out of mine, ok? Trust me, there's nothing of interest to you in there."

Sesshomaru hesitated, inexplicably drawn back to when Inuyasha had shared the kimari memory with him. Suddenly, he could see it.

His little Inu-pup, excitedly trying to play.  
The ball bouncing over the bridge.  
_'Mother? What's a 'half-breed'?'_  
The smell of tears as he was hugged and warm drops ran into his hair.

So that was what a human mother was like? What a hug felt like? Weakness as an expected part of a growing human's life rather than a deep failing.

"Hey, you asshole, that's not for you!"

He was jerked back to awareness as a pinecone struck his chest. He smelled tears and looked up to see Inuyasha had his back turned. The pain from the memory ached in his chest, and he had the desire to raze the village that had done that to his Inuyasha.

He saw a velvety ear twitch. "I thought you said we were gonna sleep."

_'If you had been there, it wouldn't have happened.' 'Oh gods I did not just think that!' 'Sleepsleepsleep.'_

The thoughts went carefully blank other than a soft chant of 'please just go to sleep'

Good god no wonder Inuyasha had been so jealous of Rin. He wanted to help, to repay Inuyasha but judging by the other's thoughts it wouldn't be welcome. Instead Sesshomaru focused on razing that village, that was safe. He fell asleep and maybe it was Inuyasha's memory, who knew but he found himself in the past.

_It was right after his father had died and he walked into the castle bloody and broken from a training session, he won more than three out of four now but that fourth... Shame was worse than the wounds and he tried to slip to his room without being noticed._

_"Lost again?" his mother sneered and he froze, the words cutting deeper than any sword._

_"I'll get stronger," he replied contrite. She stood and approached him._

_"Just like your father."_

_"I'm nothing like him," he snarled, he would never abandon his pack. Tears burned his eyes._

_"You can't even beat those vermin? Some demon you are," she backhanded him and caught his broken cheek bone. He winced, knocking a tear free and looked away._

_She snorted and he thought bitterly it was only time she ever laughed anymore, "You come into my house limping like a human, crying like a human? Did I raise you so soft that he thought a hanyou whelp would be better!"_

_"Look at me!" she snapped and he did, dreading her reaction. She snorted again, "Just like him, a human in demon skin, worthless."_

Sesshomaru woke in a rage. Today hadn't been bad enough; he'd had to have _that _dream again. He rose and drew his swords intent on practicing until he no longer felt like that worthless little pup. That was what he usually did. Then he became aware of the fact that Inuyasha was awake and staring at him. Damn it to hell.

XxXx

Inuyasha turned away from the hidden pain and not-so-hidden anger in Sesshomaru's eyes, struggling to suppress his thoughts into something safer. But all he could see was the coldly beautiful demoness, eyes harder and more frozen than the youkai's had ever been, saying such cruel things and striking his brother when he was already wounded in body and spirit.

That fucking bitch! How _dare_ she?! Sesshomaru was a great demon, surely better than her rotten ass!

Staring at the ground with his jaw clenched, Inuyasha had completely forgotten that Sesshomaru could read his every thought and emotion.

His ears flattened aggressively as a growl bubbled up from his chest. He imagined sinking his claws into that pretty fucking face, erasing that hateful sneer. He'd kill her slow for what she'd done - it had been agonizingly clear that this hadn't been a one-time thing.

Not even close.

His cheeks tingled and itched, his claws sinking deeper into the branch as they lengthened. **_We would have stopped her._**

He shook his head, helpless pain fueling his rage. _If father had just died, I was probably just a baby, if I was even born yet_.

A moment of thoughtful silence, then, low and sinister, **_We could stop her now?_**

Inuyasha had leapt to the ground before he realized something important. _I don't know where to find her._

**_Bet she smells like him, but older and female._**

_I've never caught that kinda scent._

The reply sounded frustrated. **_Then ask him! Ask him where to find her_**.

Inuyasha felt his heart do something painful. _He wouldn't want my help._

**_Fuck! Then find something to kill, cause _****you're** **_pissed off, _****I'm****_ pissed off...and I just remembered that he can fucking hear us._**

Inuyasha's protectiveness stung deep but Sesshomaru put it aside. These were special circumstances, Inuyasha shouldn't have known and he shouldn't have felt the pup's reaction.

"Calm yourself."

Inuyasha stared.

"I do not wish you to hurt her and I will not allow it." _I will do everything in my power to stop you._ God damn he _had_ to stop thinking like that.

Inuyasha spluttered as his blood receded, "What, wait the hell ain't you the one sayin' family don't matter?!"

_Because I'm grateful_. "Inu-pup, you thought I was a great demon, how do you think I got that way?" he tried to keep exactly how gratifying he'd found that out of the thought.

Inuyasha pressed his lips together until they hurt. Fuck it all. His ever-helpful demon seemed ready to venture an answer to the youkai's half-rhetorical question. An answer Inuyasha didn't want to hear.

**_Worst memories...you get stronger so you don't feel like that again. Because of her, you just kept getting stronger and stronger.  
_**  
Seshomaru inclined his head. "Something like that."

Inuyasha couldn't stop his own thought. _Yeah and it made you meaner and meaner, too._

His brother's eyes widened, and Inuyasha turned away quickly. "Hey look, if it's all the same to you, I'm gonna try to get some alone time. Besides-" his ears perked a bit at his new thought "Maybe if we're not around each other we won't be in each other's heads?"

He took off without waiting for an answer, repeatedly banishing the thought that he didn't really want to be separated from the older male.

Before he'd made it out of the clearing, he was dragged to a halt as if tethered. What the-?!

He growled and lunged forward, only to hear a sound of surprise. He glanced over his shoulder to see Sesshomaru stumble towards him a bit, looking alarmed.

Inuyasha frowned. Turning to face the youkai, he pulled backwards, drawing a truly fearsome growl from the other as he was pulled forward again.

Then Sesshomaru pulled back sharply, and Inuyasha was hauled forward with a yelp.

Inuyasha leaped to his feet growling and threw himself back. Sesshomaru resisted a moment before smoothly stepping into it.

"Stop."

Inuyasha growled, "It must be part of the spell." He tugged again. It seemed the tether had gotten significantly shorter.

Sesshomaru turned and resumed his practice.

"The hell are you doing?"

"As you said it's part of the spell, presumably intended to make us fight. I do not wish to give the witch the satisfaction. I am going to practice as I intended and then I'm going to hunt down the witch." It occurred to him that he would need Inuyasha for that but he doubted _that _would be a problem. _'If you had been there, it wouldn't have happened.'_ He thought about inviting Inuyasha to join him but figured it was too late, no need to pour salt in those obvious wounds.

Inuyasha frowned at Sesshomaru's voice in his head, thinking of inviting him to practice, then dismissing the thought as 'too late' and 'salt in the wound'.

But...Inuyasha wondered what it'd be like to practice with the youkai. A longing for a stronger bond with his brother grew in him, and before he could squash the dangerous thought, Sesshomaru paused and glanced at him.

"You _do_ wish to practice together, Inu-pup?"

Awww, with the 'Inu-pup' again? It really did sound like an endearment...and damn, now Sesshomaru knew how the kinda-sorta pet name affected him. Well, shit.

He thought of random, uninteresting stuff as he pretended he wasn't blushing, and nodded. "Sure. I've...never really practised like that before, though."

The youkai smiled ever-so-slightly. "I shall show you."

Neither noticed the invisible tether slackening, even though they hadn't gotten closer.

Sesshomaru stepped through a midlevel form while Inuyasha watched then tried to repeat the steps.

Sesshomaru watched, it was a little sloppy - his front hand was too far back for precise control, his stance too tense for free movement, as though he were always braced to get hit, and the swings though powerful, went wide wasting energy and leaving him vulnerable should he miss. Still for the first time it wasn't terrible. He refrained from voicing his thoughts lest Inuyasha mistake it for contempt. Remembering far too late that it was pointless.

Inuyasha frowned at the youkai, ready to snipe at him. But then he realized the tone of the thought was not contemptuous or mocking; it was simply observation from a place of more training and experience.

He let out a breath and nodded. "Ok. I can tell from your thoughts what I need to fix."

Inuyasha felt the older canine's relief that he hadn't taken the criticism 'the wrong way'.

He adjusted his grip and tried to relax his stance, sensing approval.

It occurred to Sesshomaru as he watched Inuyasha's far better second attempt—no problems there except that it was too slow and his footwork non-existent—that he may wind up regretting making the pup more powerful. He shrugged mentally, proving himself would hardly be worth anything if he intentionally disadvantaged Inuyasha. If he was worth anything at all he'd be able to beat Inu-pup at his best.

He remembered their sparring and shook that off quick.

Inuyasha blinked and kept his thoughts carefully blank. But he knew what he'd heard. Did Sesshomaru really doubt himself? Why? He was lethal as fuck and he didn't have a rival when it came to power and sheer determination to kill.  
_That's not blank thoughts!_ he scolded himself.

"If that were true, you would not be here."

He winced and flattened his ears in embarrassment and a bit of uncertain fear.

They went through a few more swordforms without speaking, Inuyasha correcting himself based on thoughts he picked up.

Finally, Sesshomaru sheathed his swords. "That is enough for today."

Inuyasha nodded, sheathing Tetsusaiga. He turned just as Sesshomaru was stepping by, and his hand brushed the youkai's replacement arm.

He jumped a bit. "It's warm! How is that?

Sesshomaru pulled back the sleeve, allowing Inuyasha to get his first good up-close look. The steel was clearly made with demon magic; there were no hinges or joints, just one smooth appendage that looked a lot like a regular arm colored silver.

He cautiously touched the grooves carved into the metal, wondering what their purpose was.

"To make it lighter."

He nodded. "I know it's metal, but it's warm like flesh. Can you feel me touching it?"

The youkai hesitated thoughtfully. "In a way. I can feel your touch, but it is not quite the same sensation as on skin."

Inuyasha whistled low. "This musta cost you a pretty penny."

An image flashed in his mind of being tied down as a creature with steel fangs inflicted horrendous pain.

He jerked back instinctively, ears flattening. Panting, he looked up at Sesshomaru, seeing shock and something like alarm. "What the fuck was _that_?" he demanded.

The youkai shook his head. "Nothing to be concerned about, Inu-pup."

Inuyasha hesitated, then carefully focused, pushing against the carefully blank space he could sense.

"Inuyasha..." A warning.

A warning he didn't heed.

He pushed harder, holding that image in his mind. Then, as if a gate had opened, he tumbled into a memory of fire and pain and blood.

Sesshomaru moved without thinking, blind with rage and backhanded Inuyasha with his steel arm. The pup crashed to the ground. No, no, no! It was bad enough that Inuyasha had seen that dream about Mother but at least he'd still been a pup back then.

He advanced on Inuyasha eyes blood red, this fucking piece of human garbage who could best him in combat, who their father thought was more worthy than he, who'd actually made him shed a tear. This walking talking reminder of his every failure wanted to see more weakness!

He was not that worthless pup anymore. He wasn't and if he had to tear Inuyasha's throat out or die trying he would prove it. Inuyasha's scent was changing as he transformed and flooded with fear.

Wait...fear...no that was wrong. Hadn't that bothered him before, he hadn't wanted Inu-pup to be scared right?

His vision cleared and he saw Inuyasha, transformation almost complete, blood dripping from his mouth and fear rolling off him.

Shit.

XxXx

Inuyasha was terrified. If ever there was a time he _wanted_ to hear his demon's voice and feel that power surge through him, it was now.

But as the sun sank below the horizon, the howling in his head faded, and all he could hear was Sesshomaru's voice in his mind, snarling hateful things. Some of which, he'd heard before, while some was new.

He was nothing to his brother but garbage and a reminder of some kinda failure. The youkai was advancing on him, eyes glowing red in the growing darkness and fangs bared in undeniable threat.

He scrambled backwards, hitting a boulder. Then Sesshomaru stopped, the red slowly fading from his eyes.

_'Shit.'_

He cringed against the boulder at the thought from the older male, cursing every bit of himself. His demon side had left, his human side was weak. He tasted blood in his mouth and was pretty sure he was missing a tooth.

"Inuyasha?"

He cringed harder, curling up to make a smaller target. Yes, he'd done this before when he'd gotten beaten up - if he protected his vulnerable areas, it wouldn't hurt so bad.

"Inuyasha, look at me."

He refused, tucking his face against his knees and bracing for the pain. Punches and kicks, he could take, claws would probably hurt, though.

_'What have I done? I didn't want him to fear me again.'_  
"Inuyasha, it's ok. I'm not mad at you."

He whimpered softly, beginning to shake violently as memories of all the times Sesshomaru had hurt him flooded his mind. Oh gods, the poison! That'd _definitely_ hurt.

_'He's so scared. I should leave him alone. But...I can't leave him like this. Not in this condition. It would be abandoning him.'_  
"Inu-pup, I promise I won't poison you. I'm not going to hurt you anymore."

Finally, the hurt and regret in the youkai's thoughts registered. Inuyasha cautiously raised his head an inch and peeked at the demon. Sesshomaru no longer seemed threatening. He raised his head a bit more.

His brother looked concerned, reaching out to gently wipe the blood from the corner of his mouth.

"Inuyasha, I am sorry."

Inuyasha forced a smile and tried to make his voice sound strong and confident, "For what? You warned me."

_Still forgiving me?_ The thought was stunned and layered with more gratitude than Inuyasha had thought the elder could feel.

"That's not an excuse, we're no longer enemies," Sesshomaru said. The pup's fear and bravado were obvious even without the spell and he fervently wished he'd reacted...in any other way really. Sesshomaru sat with his back to where Inuyasha was sitting and Inuyasha took the chance to hastily wipe away his tears, he _really _hadn't wanted things to go back to the way they were.

"They won't," Sesshomaru said quietly. Inuyasha huffed as the reassurance brought more tears to his eyes, damn human body it seemed he kept crying lately no matter how...he stopped thinking.

"I did warn you about that vermin mate of yours didn't I?"  
Inuyasha licked his still-bleeding lip, trying to think through the pain that throbbed through his face. Mate? Uhh...

Sesshomaru sighed. "When you asked about mating, and then asked if rejection didn't have to be painful."

Inuyasha stiffened at the memory of his brother's reaction. _If you think this vermin would hurt you, he is not worthy.  
_  
So wait, was Sesshomaru saying...no. He couldn't be... If anyone in this equation wasn't worthy of the other, it sure as fuck wasn't the powerful youkai. Inuyasha tried to silence his thoughts, but had a feeling it was too late.

The older male's back stiffened a bit. _'He can't really believe that.' _ Sesshomaru's thought cut across his mind.

Inuyasha sighed. "We're so damn dysfunctional."

Sesshomaru said nothing but his agreement was obvious through the spell. A thought occurred to Inuyasha but he sure as hell wasn't going to broach the topic until sunrise. Damn it. Shock, a bit of anger and more than a little horror.

"You don't _want_ the spell reversed?" The words were ice, chilling Inuyasha to the bone.

He hastened to explain himself, not consciously realizing he was afraid he'd get struck again if he didn't give a suitable answer. "It's just that I'm so bad at explaining myself. And, umm, you're not exactly an extrovert, so...I dunno, I thought maybe it'd help us communicate better, understand each other?"

He bit his lip at the carefully blank silence. "I don't necessarily want to like know your secrets, and I don't wanna learn stuff just to use it against you. But maybe we can use it to our advantage? Like when we move on the mountain; maybe knowing each other's plan will keep us from getting in the other's way?"

Sesshomaru's thoughts remained mostly neutral, but a thread of curiosity caught Inuyasha's attention. _'He could very well learn things about me he could use, yet he would not?'_

He turned his own thoughts to mundane things in an effort to let his brother think in peace.

Birds.  
Snow.  
Food.  
Attacking the mountain.  
Their pack.

Oh, yeah, they definitely didn't need to share their new 'ability' with them - it was none of their business. His private thoughts were his own, and he wouldn't reveal Sesshomaru's under torture.

Sesshomaru stiffened in surprise. Really? Inuyasha would keep his secrets? If that were true and the spell proved to be useful in battle, Inuyasha might be on to something. Given a choice he would have kept his secrets from his brother as well but it was rather too late for that, the memory of the night he'd given Inuyasha his answer flashed for an instant before he chased it and the pain away.

"We should find a way to test its value in combat. We must see if it's more help or hindrance before we move on the mountain," he said and turned to face the pup.

Inuyasha firmly ignored the flash he'd seen. The instant of pain was _not_ his business, especially when nothing was official between them. He would prove to Sesshomaru he could be mature about this, and it didn't have to be all bad.

Though...he still desperately wanted to know what his brother thought of him in regards to the idea of being mates.

Quickly as possible, he banished that thought. "Ok, so do you think sparring would work? Or do we find a demon and kick its ass?"

"I think we wait until you're a demon again. Also I may reconsider the spell if you keep picturing _that_," he said disturbed, though he did take note of the fact that Inuyasha was the submissive in that particular scenario which was a pleasant surprise.

Inuyasha flushed with embarrassment as he realized his brother had noticed his dirty train of thought. _Well, shit._

"Indeed."

Inuyasha scuffed the ground with his foot, muttering, "Dunno why you'd be surprised, though." _Of _course_ you'd be top. I might not be the sharpest sword, but I ain't stupid. I know where my place would be._

He silenced the thoughts when he heard the self-loathing and resignation in them.

Before Sesshomaru could reply in word or thought, Inuyasha yawned widely.

The youkai spoke quietly. "You should get some rest. Human bodies can take a lot less before they become worn out."

He shook his head, stifling another yawn. "I know that. But I've never slept on a human night. Well, maybe I did as a baby, but not since I can remember."

Sesshomaru looked at him oddly. "You just...do not sleep?"

He shrugged, shifting to get more comfy. "Nope."

He paused at the brief thought that skittered across his mind. "I _would_ trust you to keep me safe. It's just...well, a two-hundred year old habit can't be broken in one night."

He yawned again, then stood and walked a bit to keep his blood flowing. He winced when pain shot through his ankle. He'd fallen awkwardly when Sesshomaru had hit - nope, not going there. The absolute _last_ thing he wanted right now was for his brother to think he was seeking pity over that.

He tried not to limp, but that soon became impossible, so he sat back down.

"Do you think you can not die for a few moments until I return?" hints of concern and amusement tinted both word and thought.

"I've managed this long haven't I?" he shot back.

Sesshomaru disappeared, returned less than a minute later and tossed a scrap of cloth iced down in river water at Inuyasha. Inuyasha caught it not sure if he was more surprised by the fact that it was cut from his brother's robe or the nervous uncertainty that came with the offering. He settled for just being surprised that it'd been offered at all then realized he should probably say something.

Before he could open his mouth, Sesshomaru gestured to his temple. "Relax, Inu-pup. I know how you feel."

Inuyasha fought a blush as he tied the icy silk around his ankle, relieved when the pain faded a bit. He yawned - damn he was tired.

Sensing his brother's intention, he wasn't surprised when Sesshomaru sat down next to him. "I'm not going to sleep."

Sesshomaru nodded. "I didn't say you had to."

"Good."

They sat in silence for a while, keeping their thoughts commonplace.

Sesshomaru noticed that Inuyasha's thoughts were becoming hazier and more disjointed. He kept his own thoughts quiet and gentle, amused by the pup's attempts to fight sinking under.

_'Mmm can't go t'sleep. Hum'n nigh'. Mmmmmthink stuff. Mhmm wonder what'll h'ppen if we do ...mm...become mates? Mmm like 'im when he's nice...mmhmm...yeah...  
_  
Sesshomaru stayed still as Inuyasha slowly tilted to lean against him, breathing slow and soft, scent calm and peaceful. Inuyasha felt safe.


	10. A New Form

Chapter 10 -A New Form

A/N: Sesshomarufreak is amazing and so much fun to work with. Thanks to all the reviews as well for enjoying this ride with us.

Sesh's a/n - Time is awesome and has the patience of a saint. And yes thank you for reading!

**TRIGGER WARNING** \- nightmare involving hard physical abuse! Please read with caution!

Other warnings - violence/fighting, language, we're trying to make it clearer when they're speaking out loud vs in their thoughts.

"Talking"

_'Thoughts'_

**"Demonized Inu"**

_**'Demon in Inu's head'**_

* * *

_((Sesshomaru stayed still as Inuyasha slowly tilted to lean against him, breathing slow and soft, scent calm and peaceful. Inuyasha felt safe.))_

Over the next hour or so, Inuyasha shifted bit by bit until his head was in Sesshomaru's lap. He gazed at the humanized pup for a while, then tentatively laid one hand on the thick black hair.

He had been sitting that way for some time, when Inuyasha whimpered fearfully. Wondering what terrorized his brother now, Sesshomaru didn't resist the images that washed over him.

He was in a forest, dark, with malevolence and terror hanging in the air. Pounding footsteps caught his attention, and Inuyasha tore by him like a bat out of Hell. Behind the hanyou, eyes glowing with a cruel light, was himself. And he was gaining fast. Too fast for Inuyasha to escape._  
_  
Equal parts curious and concerned, he watched as 'he' caught his brother by the hair and spun him around. Inuyasha screamed, a sound of absolute terror that he'd never heard before, a sound that had him digging his claws into his palm. The dream-him laughed maliciously and flung the smaller male into the nearest tree._  
_  
Sesshomaru heard bones snap, and growled, advancing on this apparition that was terrifying and hurting his Inu-pup. Neither seemed to notice him as the youkai in front of him seemed to grow a few inches as he stalked towards the crumpled hanyou. "Filthy, disgusting, _worthless_ half-breed!" the dream him snarled viciously, kicking the whimpering pup.

Sesshomaru couldn't seem to get within reach of the pair, and he watched with helpless, growing horror as the youkai reached down towards Inuyasha. The younger male's ears were laid down in fearful submission, and the other Sesshomaru dug his claws into one, hauling the crying hanyou to his feet, then up on tiptoe. "You should never have been born, pathetic excuse for a half-breed! Everything is _your_ fault!"

Sesshomaru struggled to get closer, but it was like he was underwater or in quicksand. He had to stop this!

The other him backhanded Inuyasha across the face while still holding his ear. He released the bleeding appendage, just to grab the younger male's throat and slam him repeatedly against the tree, hard enough that Sesshomaru couldn't tell if the ominous cracking he heard was bones or wood.

The demon finally dropped the smaller male, who was choking on sobs and asking, "Why?" The dream him hauled his foot back, aiming to kick Inuyasha in the face.

Sesshomaru could tell from the angles that the blow would break his little brother's neck.

"Inuyasha!" he screamed, only to find himself back in his body, sitting with a crying Inuyasha's head in his lap. Desperate not to leave his Inu-pup alone with that monster, he shook a trembling shoulder. "Wake up, Inuyasha!"

The younger male bolted upright, gasping.

"Inu-pup, it was just a dream. You're ok, I'm not going to hurt you."

Inuyasha stared at him without comprehension for nearly a full minute, then surged to his feet, only for the wounded ankle to give out on him. The human crawled several feet away and hugged his knees, rocking as he cried silently.

The nightmare was coursing through his mind over and over.

Sesshomaru didn't know what to do, but relief filled him when he saw that the sky had lightened.

The sun was about to rise.

As golden light poured over them, Inuyasha's hair rippled into silver and his scent turned to hanyou. Velvety ears were laid back in the same position they'd been in the dream.

Suddenly, demon overtook the scent.

**"That mother fucker!"**

Sesshomaru was surprised when Inuyasha snarled and whirled on him, stripes crawling over his cheeks and hair streaming in a sudden breeze, even as thoughts competed in his head.

_'No! It was a nightmare! Just a dream!'_  
**_'Fuck that! I'm killing this evil mother fucker before he can treat us like that again!'_**

_'No! It's not like that anymore!'_

Sesshomaru blinked. _Again? Anymore_? Yes, he'd been cruel in the past, but never like the dream-demon. Had he?

Images washed over his mind of the times he'd hurt Inuyasha. His hand going through the hanyou's body. Poisoning him repeatedly. Striking him for no reason. Flinging him to the ground in their father's tomb.

Through Inuyasha's thoughts, he realized that he'd broken bone more than once, but the pup had hidden the extent of his injuries as a form of self-preservation, as they could be taken as weakness.

Inuyasha jumped to his feet and took two steps towards him, growling fiercely.

_'Stop it!'_

The hanyou paused, demon blood receding. Inuyasha stared at him, then turned away.

Sesshomaru could still hear the thoughts.

_'It was just a dream.'_  
Low and sullen, **'_He_** **did****_ hit us as the sun was going down.'_**  
_'That was...an accident.'_  
A skeptical snort. **'_You gonna say that if it happens again?'_**  
_'...No.'_  
**_'This shit right here is why_** **I****_ don't want him to be our mate.'_**  
'._..Shut your fucking mouth.'_

XxXx

Inuyasha only got a few more feet away before that damn tether stopped him. He growled over his shoulder. "Are you coming or not?"

Three swords hit the ground around him, thrown in open disgust.

"The fuck?" for answer armor joined the swords and he turned to see Sesshomaru stripping off Ko gyoko.

"You want revenge right?"

"No that isn't..."

"Then take it if you can filthy half-breed," he goaded.

**_'You heard the bastard,'_** the demon yipped for joy.

But all Inuyasha heard was guilt and a desire for atonement and under that, very faint an easy resignation. _'__Nothing I haven't felt before.'_

Inuyasha rubbed his face with both hands, trying to ignore the demon in him crying out for blood. "Dammit Sesshomaru, don't do this to me, ok? I'm not gonna just attack you without reason."

**_'Why not?'_**  
"I have done so to you."  
**_'He has.'_**

He frowned. "Ok, you two are _not_ allowed to agree with each other against me. That's just fucked up."

Sesshomaru stood in front of him, looking...well, not vulnerable, cause that was just a stupid thought. But without the armor and fluff and weapons, he didn't look as formidable as usual, and it struck Inuyasha that he'd done this _for him_.

It'd actually probably be in really bad taste to turn his offer down.

**_'And I know you don't want to disappoint him_**.'

_'No, I don't.'_

**_'Then...?'_**

Sesshomaru gazed at him levelly and tried to keep the validation he felt at 'that's just a stupid thought' at bay lest it throw the pup off. "You and your demon may attack together."

Inuyasha hesitated; he could never do some of the stuff he had nightmares about. He shut that thought down quick, fast and in a hurry before it could develop and reveal other nightmares.

"I can't attack you if you won't at least defend yourself."

The youkai nodded. "You have yourself a deal, Inu-pup. I will defend myself, but I will not raise a claw in offense."

Inuyasha sighed. "If you want this, you gotta not call me that until...later."

Sesshomaru gave a smug smirk. "Would you prefer 'half-breed' for now?"

Inuyasha growled softly, ears laying back in aggression. "Yeah, that works."

He called his howling demon forth as he dropped Tetsusaiga on the ground, then lunged.

Sesshomaru didn't even bother blocking the flurry of body blows. "Come on you can do better than that half-breed."

Inuyasha swung a left hook at his head and he blocked, that'd been harder than he intended - he hoped he hadn't hurt Inu-pup's arm.

**"Stop that!"** Inuyasha snarled. Right damn. The right hook caught his jaw and he smiled.

"That's it? Worthless hanyou."

And the fight continued with Sesshomaru yelling whatever insults came to mind and blocking what he could, occasionally simply guarding with both arms when the flurry was too intense for individual blocks. Not being able to fight back was bad, restraining himself required far more effort than actually taking the blows, but with the exception of two instinctive swings that both thankfully missed he managed it.

On the whole he felt rather guilty, those ribs he was protecting were probably broken and blood dripped from his mouth and some scratches but it was nothing. Inuyasha's foot swept his leg and they struggled for balance for a bit before Inuyasha brought him down. He clung close while Inuyasha tried to punch anything he could reach but the angle was so awkward they had no power. Then claws drove into his shoulder and raked down his arms, he gritted his teeth as they raked again then down his back. It didn't compared to the fletchette whip but it wasn't exactly pleasant.

He sensed Inuyasha falter.

"What a disappointment you are. I hope your bitch had some skill in the rut or father died for nothing."

Inuyasha growled fiercely as they rolled on the ground. The only thing that kept him going was memory and being able to tell that his opponent didn't actually _mean_ the hateful shit he was saying.

But the whole Kagome thing was a deep sore spot.

He had just ended up on top during the rolling, and managed, somehow, to pin the youkai's arms and have one knee planted on his chest. He hauled back and drove his fist right into the stripes on Sesshomaru's cheek.

He froze in the middle of hauling back again when a high-pitched yelp split the air. He stared down into wide golden eyes, catching the smothered thought that even the steel demon hadn't discovered the weakness...

**"Your markings?"**

Sesshomaru was trembling under him, and he could tell the older male was using every bit of self-control not to throw him off and beat the daylights out of him.

After a long, uneasy silence, Sesshomaru turned his head as if offering the markings he'd hit. This...wasn't right.

Slowly, he backed off of the demon. Sesshomaru frowned. "What are you doing?"

Inuyasha shook his head. **"I'm done. I told you, I'd never use a weakness against you. It don't matter what happened before, things are supposed to be different between us now."**

He brushed dirt and grass off of himself, avoiding amber eyes as his brother sat up, smelling of blood and pain. Damn, if he'd known about the markings, he never would've struck them.

"Do not concern yourself, Inu-pup. You deserved to do that."

He didn't respond as he let his blood recede.

_'Happy now?'_

He sensed shuffling as the soft reply filled his head. _**'**_**_Yeah. Got my pound of flesh. But...I didn't know about the markings…Ours are sensitive, but I didn't think about his being that way.'_**

He shrugged, exhausted over the whole thing. '_Whatever. Go creep through my brain or whatever you do in there, and just leave me alone for a bit.'_

**_'Ok.'_**

It was mercifully silent.

Sesshomaru spoke quietly. "If you wish to do this again sometime..."

Inuyasha shrugged. "Yeah ok. We'll see."

"Let's go test the link," Sesshomaru said rising smoothly to his feet and donning his equipment again. He was experienced enough to hide the minor aches, after all he'd walked half night and fought a small human army missing... He cut that thought off. His markings throbbed but he almost wished Inuyasha had struck him again. It shamed him that the pup thought him so weak, that he wasn't sure he wasn't. Why did he have to yelp like that? Pathetic!

_The image of his mother standing over him hand drawn back for another strike and he flinched. "Can't take it? No wonder your father didn't want you, coward."_

_"I can. Go on," he said, trying to sound calm, trying to get to his feet. Failing at both._

_She shook her head laughing, "Begging now are we? Looking at you is making me sick." She left the room._

Inuyasha flinched away from the youkai, trying desperately to think of _anything_ else besides what he'd just seen.

Fuck. That fucking bitch.

He clenched his jaw and continued walking. He could smell Sesshomaru's blood, and yeah, _that_ was helping. He was disappointed in himself; instead of feeling better like Sesshomaru had intended and wanted, he just felt guilty as hell.

He wanted the demon to be his mate, and had hurt him. So what if Sesshomaru didn't think it was 'that bad'? He'd still hurt him for no reason other than revenge. How pathetic.

A thought blazed across his mind and his head snapped up. "What?"

Sesshomaru glanced at him. "You heard me."

Inuyasha focused on the thought. His brother had wanted him to attack and get his anger out, so that the past and his dream wouldn't make him change his mind.

"You let me do that shit so I'd still want you as my mate?"

Sesshomaru didn't reply, but a fleeting thought confirmed it.

"You actually _want_ to be mated with me?"

The youkai frowned. "I said your offer would be accepted if you still felt the same, did I not?"

Inuyasha huffed. "Well, yeah. But I got the impression you were just 'ok' with the idea, not that you really wanted to."

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow. "There is a difference?"

"Uhh, yeah! Ok with it just means you don't have a major problem with it. Wanting to means you're looking forward to it and will do shit to make sure it happens."

"Is that why you weren't...certain?" Sesshomaru asked his mind was carefully blank and Inuyasha was _not_ dumb enough to poke around again.

He felt a bit of amusement at that thought and smiled a little, "I have my moments."

"If you say so," Sesshomaru replied outwardly impassive but the bond carried lots of playfulness. It struck Inuyasha that he thought and felt a lot. Had you asked him a couple months ago what went on in his would be mate's mind he would have said it was something like kill, new weapon, kill, arrogance, kill Inuyasha, battle, maybe something about Rin and more killing Inuyasha. He'd never really thought of Sesshomaru as being flesh and blood like him.

He caught a brief flash of disappointment and anger and looked up realizing he'd let his mind wander.

"What did I do? I'm sorry," he said getting worried.

"Just answer the question," Sesshomaru said and Inuyasha was greeted by the blank wall again with wisps of a sort of nonphysical exhaustion and 'ow stripes'.

Briefly, Inuyasha wondered if licking the markings would make them feel better.

He sighed, deciding he'd figure out what had caused that instant of disappointment later as he answered the question. "Yeah, for the most part. I didn't know how you'd feel about..uhh...basically being proposed to by a hanyou. I was so nervous about bringing you the cat."

Sesshomaru glanced at him. "'Proposed to'?"

Inuyasha fought a blush. "Umm, it's the human version of asking someone to be your mate? Like when you ask someone to spend the rest of their lives with you cause you..." _Love them._

He continued quickly, hoping that stray thought would get lost in translation. "I wasn't sure what to expect from you. And in spite of the spell, I'm still not completely sure. The first hint I really picked up that you might be even a little invested in the idea was after...after Kagome."

Hurt sizzled across his mind before being locked away behind the blankness. He swallowed, his ears tilting back. "I _am _sorry about that, Sesshomaru. I didn't...if I could go back, I never woulda fought in demon form without knowing what was gonna happen."

He glanced up, but the youkai wasn't looking at him, though the pointed ear seemed a bit perked. "I know you'd deny it to your dying breath, but knowing that I hurt you makes me sick."

For a moment, he focused on the consuming guilt he felt over rutting with Kagome, trying to show his brother that he truly regretted what he'd done.

In response, a memory came to him. Sesshomaru, sitting in camp alone...and hearing and smelling them. They hadn't been far enough away.

Inuyasha gasped, feeling nauseous. "Oh gods. Shit. I'm so sorry!" He hugged his arms around himself at the pain in the memory, wishing that he could hug his brother without potentially getting his arms liberated from his body. Tears burning his eyes, he whispered, "I'm so sorry, Sesshomaru."

The older male spoke quietly. "There is no need to feel _this_ badly, Inu-pup. I had not given you a real answer, and as you said, you 'weren't sure what to expect from me'."

Sesshomaru felt the doubt and desire for comfort in Inuyasha's thoughts. With a soft sigh and cursing his own weakness he wrapped his arms around Inuyasha.

"It's really okay. I did not mean to make you feel guilty." _Had I been able to hide my reaction I would have._

Inuyasha stiffened for a beat before realizing that ohholyshit Sesshomaru was _hugging_ him?!

He sensed a trace of amusement at his thoughts, and he tentatively slid his own arms around the youkai's waist, on high alert for any negative thoughts. When none came, he rested his head against Sesshomaru's chest, listening to the strong heartbeat.

He remembered what the taller canine had said about not meaning to make him feel guilty, and allowed his own opinion on the matter to come to the front of his mind. For the first time since the spell had been placed, he deliberately communicated with just his thoughts. '_'s not your fault, none of that is. I deserve this guilt for what I did.'  
_  
He felt a sigh against his hair as the soft reply drifted into his mind. _'Not to this extent.'_

He smiled, absorbing the comfort in the hug for a moment longer. The gentle contact soothed something deep inside him, but he didn't want to take too much advantage and make Sesshomaru regret it.

He took a deep breath and reluctantly pulled away a bit. His brother released him, and he smiled up at Sesshomaru, letting his thoughts convey what the hug had meant to him and how much he'd appreciated it.

Then he sensed a low-level energy nearby. "Ready to test out the link in a fight?"

Inuyasha laughed drawing Tetsusaiga and tried not to feel more guilty at the sudden absence of pain as Sesshomaru presumably blocked it out in anticipation of the fight. Damn he wished he had that trick, he could handle it but he still _felt_ it, not like whatever Sesshomaru had just done.

_'It's a skill like any other - I can teach you.'_

Inuyasha was way too happy about that and…

'_Move_!' Inuyasha dodged the blade sweeping at his head. '_Idiot being distracted_.'

"Not helpful." Inuyasha shot back out loud. The demon focused on Inuyasha and Sesshomaru darted in slicing at its many arms.

_'There are more coming.' _Inuyasha thought, throwing a backlash wave at the demon.

_'I'd noticed. Focus on killing blows I'll keep them off you,_' Sesshomaru drew Gekko and dual wielded like a goddamn dancer. _'Flash makes a good distraction. Now stop ogling and do your job_.'

Inuyasha didn't bother fighting his blush as he dove into their original opponent with a lethal throat slice. To assure that it wouldn't come back, he Iron Reaver'ed its skull, then whirled and dove at the fray trying to surround his brother. Not that Sesshomaru would _need_ help, a flash of pain jolted across his consciousness, and for a moment, he almost panicked.

_Stay calm._ he reminded himself as he began methodically fighting through the few demons between him and his target, calling his blood forth for the demon's added strength.

**_'He's hurt.'_**  
_'I know. Focus.'_

Between claws and Tetsusaiga, Inuyasha soon reached the magnificent youkai, felling demons two and three at a time, even as blood streamed down his side.

Sesshomaru felt Inuyasha's single minded focus and looked over at him, lashing out with Tokjin blind to slay the demon he'd been facing.

'_Down'_ Inuyasha dropped flat and he gave Gekko a little wrist flick. A volley of bolts of pure light shot from the glowing stripe on the sword like a crossbow. They flew over Inuyasha's head, purifying the demons that had been bearing down on his exposed back. Inuyasha felt Sesshomaru's surprise and pleasure at the sword's ability as he ran on all fours to cover the elder, setting up back to back.

In short order the fight was over and feeling Inuyasha's...eagerness Sesshomaru stepped close laying a hand on the pup's shoulder.

"Don't touch me bastard!" Inuyasha snarled slapping him away, raking his wrist bloody. Sesshomaru stepped back as though burned though the echoes of pain Inuyasha felt weren't remotely physical.

"It's okay Inu-pup. I know it's not you," Sesshomaru said tightly, turning away as Inuyasha argued loudly with his demon.

'_What the fuck, you psychopath?! What is _wrong_ with you?' _Inuyasha screamed, devastated that he'd hurt Sesshomaru again._  
_  
**_'That bastard doesn't need to be touching us!'_**

_'What the actual fuck? One moment you're all 'he's hurt' and the next you're drawing blood over a _touch?_'_

**_'You felt what he was thinking. I'm not interested in that, not remotely. Now is there anyone else around?'_**

Inuyasha felt his jaw drop. '_Are you serious?'_

A surge of desire and the need to dominate washed over him. '**_Very.'_**

_'Why not him?'_

**_'...I have no desire to be controlled any further. I need to dominate. He would never submit. Simple.'  
_**_  
'You can go straight to Hell.'_

Inuyasha reined in his blood and made it recede, hearing the grumbling in his mind. No way. He wanted Sesshomaru as his mate. He didn't want Kagome, or Koga, or anyone else. If his demon blood kept trying to get some from others, absolutely no good could come of that.

_That vicious bastard wants to be dominant...well that's too bad. He needs to understand that_ I_ want Sesshomaru, and in that equation, there's only one role for me._

'_You're an idiot. As I said dominance can be ceded for a single session and either way, it's better than the alternative,_' Sesshomaru called up a split second memory, him taking a steadying breath and brushing his arm over his eyes before setting out for Totosai's.

Inuyasha sighed, trying not to feel anything even resembling pity over that memory and the scent of tears from that night. "Look, I'm not even supposed to be thinking about _kissing_, and we're dancing around the topic of _fucking_? My demon's just an asshole, ok? Whenever we go to cross that bridge, I wouldn't dream of suggesting you lower your pride like that."

He started walking, only to falter when a whisper reached his thoughts. _'I never said you'd have to suggest it.'_

**_'Is he saying what I think he's saying? He can't be serious! Oh, I'd fu-'_**

Inuyasha was startled into stopping his demon out loud. "Hey now! Don't you dare!"

**_'I'd do all _****kinds****_ of shit to him. Well, _****we ****_would. You know you wanna be the one in control for once. What would he look like on his-'_**

Inuyasha imagined being able to wring his demon's neck. '_Oh gods, shut UP!'_

**_'Hmm, he's blanking his thoughts again. Wonder what he's hiding?'_**  
_  
'None of our fucking business, you creep!'_

**_'I bet he'd make some interesting sounds...'_**

_'Whatever! Ok just get back to the pack, attack the mountain. Get back to the pack, attack the mountain.'  
_  
**_'You're no fun.'_**

Sesshomaru tried not to blush at Inuyasha's thoughts or regret his choice and reminded himself that the wound to his pride would be far worse otherwise.

"Let's get back."

Sesshomaru called up an old fantasy of Inuyasha's fighting alongside his brother as a near equal, feeling safe in the knowledge that Sesshomaru would protect him.

'_I'm sorry if I ruined that for you. Reality rarely measures up to the myth,' _bitter failure and remorse accompanied the projected thought.

Inuyasha blinked as he fell in line with the demon. '_Nothing's ruined. Other than my demon acting crazy, I had a good time fighting with you.'_

Then it flared through his mind that Sesshomaru had been thinking about the older version of that fantasy, the one he'd been holding onto since the day they met.

_'Oh. Well, apology accepted. I'm not upset about that anymore. At least, not much. So don't worry about it.'  
_  
The remorse and failure still lingered with a touch of annoyance. Inuyasha had a fleeting thought of taking the demon's hand in comfort and solidarity, but dismissed it as probably too mushy for Sesshomaru's tastes. Did demons even hold hands? Or was that a human thing he'd picked up?

Even if demons did hold hands, that didn't mean his demon would like it.

**_You think way, way too much._**

_'He's right, Inu-pup. You overthink things.'_

_'__You're one to talk and what have I said about you two agreeing?'_ Inuyasha said but obeyed. He got a general impression that Sesshomaru found it far easier to be open mind to mind than to actually talk.

_'I may not live up to the myth but I _will_ try to protect you and I'd be honored to fight by your side.'_

Inuyasha's breath stuttered in his chest at the thought that lit up in his mind, and he unconsciously lifted a hand to cover his heart. The proclamation alone was enough to live up to his most heartfelt wishes.

His big brother would try to protect him. It was all he'd wanted for so long.

And to be honored to fight by his side? That was just extra icing on the cake.

Sesshomaru could change his mind about the whole mating thing, and while that would be a major bummer, he'd still be happy that the youkai wanted to protect him.

He would not cry, he would not cry, he would not cry, he would not -

He was crying. Not a lot, just a couple tears, but dammit! Uggh! Thoroughly disgusted with himself, he sighed and focused on not committing any further stupidity.

Sesshomaru was utterly confused he felt only happiness, relief and a sense of safety from Inuyasha. All in measures that seemed wildly out of proportion to what he'd 'said' but still. He didn't even feel any offense at his offer of protection which he'd been worried about despite Inuyasha's fantasies.

"What's wrong?" he asked and tentatively laid a hand on Inuyasha shoulder.

"Absolutely nothing," Inuyasha said half laughing. Except I'm crying in front of the last person on earth I want to be _again_. The thought came with an image of himself pushing Inuyasha away in disgust and a truly disturbing amount of fear.

_'Why does everyone think I care? If it annoys me I'll leave until you calm down. I told Rin this but I assumed she was simply too young to understand.'_

Inuyasha sniffed back the fresh burn, focusing on the thought in his brother's mind. '_Cause you act so emotionless sometimes, it seems like someone showing their emotions would be disgusting to you.'  
_  
The hand stayed on his shoulder as they continued walking. '_Do you still think of me that way?'  
_  
Wanting to answer honestly, Inuyasha thought for a moment, comparing the image he'd long held of Sesshomaru to the one he'd formed over the last couple of months. '_Not really. You're not emotionless, you just don't show how you feel a lot. But, even before the spell, you were...opening up to me some. And that means a lot to me.'_

He focused on the brief moments, silently expressing his surprise, but that he'd been honored by that trust. Before the spell, Sesshomaru had had the option of not letting him in. Instead, his brother had chosen to share things with him. Like his worst memory — Inuyasha refused to think in detail right now — Sesshomaru had really been under no obligation to share that; he hadn't given his word that he would.

'_Just...thanks for trusting me, Sesshomaru.'_

Sesshomaru nodded, _'Then trust _me._'_

He formed an image of them fighting side by side, Inuyasha laughing full of confidence and indomitable fighting spirit, Sesshomaru cold and lethal as sharpened steel. The pack gazing admiringly at their powerful alphas completely ignorant of how broken they were.

Inuyasha couldn't stop the ridiculous grin that crossed his face at the image from his brother, his imaginary tail wagged harder than ever in spite of the tail end of the thought. '_I want that, more than anything.'_

_'We shall have it._'

Really a tail? Maybe it had something to do with not having a true dog form. Hmm if Inuyasha could light-travel perhaps he had a dog-form now as well.

Inuyasha looked up at his intended mate. '_I might have a form like yours?'_

Sesshomaru inclined his head. '_Possibly._'

Inuyasha tried to imagine what it'd be like to have such power, then a thought occurred to him. _'Hey! What about your arm? Will it transform, too?'_

'_I don't know. One way to find out,_' He let his eyes glow, smoothly transforming as normal except half-way in the arm still hadn't changed. He gave a small growl of frustration, a slight show of what he was feeling. It felt like it should transform but...an odd sensation of not quite being quite connected, like a joint out of place. He tried focusing harder to force the demon magic in the arm along, it was his arm and it was damn well going to transform. He wasn't going to fail in front of Inuyasha.

Then the magic in his arm flooded into the rest of his body, he gritted his teeth against searing pain but kept forcing the transformation. He saw Inuyasha flinch with the echoes, then it was gone with only a lingering ache at the site of the old wound and he was whole in dog form silver fur, darker than the rest covered his new leg. Of course the armor smith would arrange it like he thought amused, he should have guessed.

_'Do you wish to try?'_

_'Yeah sure_' Inuyashsa said though he reeked of fear and the link confirmed it.

'_It shouldn't hurt you. At worst you just won't be able to._'

Inuyasha nodded at the reassurance, focusing on his demonic energy.

**_I don't know about this._**

_C'mon, don't be a pussy. Just try._

For several moments, nothing happened, and he was starting to feel rather small and foolish.

_'__Just call up your demon blood and picture yourself…uh actually.' _Sesshomaru shifted back and transformed again making sure Inuyasha got impressions of those things he did without thought now. The confidence, the feral thoughts, the images of breaking free from a cage. He attempted to shield Inuyasha from the pain as his arm transformed but judging by the pup's expression didn't succeed much.

Inuyasha tried again with the new information, nothing happened for a few moments, but then a buzzing spread through him from his gut, a roaring filled his ears, and his body felt strangely contorted as everything in him seemed to _shift_.

Sesshomaru bared his fangs in a canine smile, half-proud, half-amused.

Inuyasha was in a true dog form, only a few feet smaller than himself. The fur was the same storm-silver as his hair, and his ears, instead of being long and floppy like Sesshomaru's, were giant replicas of his regular ears.

At the moment, they were laid back nervously as Inuyasha crouched low, whining a bit with his eyes squeezed tight.

Sesshomaru stepped close and pressed his nose against the side of his brother's head, focusing his mind on the sight of Inuyasha in his true form.

Slowly, one eye opened, focusing on him before roving their surroundings. Inuyasha carefully straightened up, legs shaking a bit as he figured out his new body. His thoughts were a mass of _'OhgodsI'msobig! Holyshit! Isthiswhathesees? Sofuckingbig!'_

Sesshomaru tilted his head, watching as the younger canine lifted each paw in turn to examine them, then his tail began to wag. Inuyasha seemed startled, looking behind him at his long, flowing tail, which began to wag faster. _'I've got a tail! Look!'_

'_I see, Inu-pup_,' he thought back, pleased that he'd helped make Inuyasha so happy.

After a fair bit of prancing, which Sesshomaru's image of a human royal's sleeve-dog stopped, and some more experimentation Inuyasha's ears drooped. He was so happy and Sesshomaru had given him control of his demon-side, light travel, improved his sword skills and now this. He felt extremely lucky, he'd gained so much power in such a short time. All Sesshomaru had gotten for trying to help had been blood.

_'Hey uh look I know there probably isn't anything but if I...'_ his ears flattened in embarrassment.

_'As long as I'm chasing you I'll get stronger. Perhaps we could spar again? After the mountain?'_

Inuyasha lowered his front half, tail waving in the air as he barked at his brother and sent thoughts in his direction. '_Ok, yeah, we can spar anytime you like.'  
_  
He pounced at Sesshomaru, but stopped short, crouching and pawing at the older male. '_Play?_'

The other dog stared at him.

'_Really?_' there was surprise and disbelief and something intangible that felt like Sesshomaru debating whether or not he even knew how to 'play'. The youkai had only ever used this form for battle.

_'There's more to life than fighting, aniki._' Inuyasha pawed at him again, pouncing back and forth in front of the demon.

Finally, Sesshomaru crouched and gave an experimental sort of pounce at him. Inuyasha yipped for joy, 'falling' when his brother pawed at him. They continued playing for nearly a half-hour, then Inuyasha yawned.

Sesshomaru moved to his side, nosing him. _'Come, lets show the pack before you fall asleep.'  
_  
Inuyasha nodded, flattening his ears in pleasure when he sensed another thought.

_'You have done well, Inu-pup.'_

They ran through the sky chasing the setting sun and Inuyasha paused to watch. He'd never had the ability before to just hover and enjoy it. Sesshomaru ran ahead then circled back but was clearly trying to keep the impatience from his thoughts.

_'It's different when you don't take it for granted._' Inuyasha explained sheepishly.

'_I take nothing for granted.'_ Memories of a hundred battlefields played on the link, a calm acceptance of death.

'_You really know nothing but war?'_ it wasn't really a question but an image of Rin picking flowers and catching fish popped into his head.

'_That's why you care about her?_' A sharp denial.

'_She was kind for no reason,' _then blankness - whatever thoughts were associated with that weren't for him.

_'That's it?'_ Inuyasha thought stupidly then remembered the memories he'd seen and realized that was probably the first kindness he'd ever been shown. He remembered his own enthrallment, admittedly a different kind for Kikyo and that had been _with_ his own sweet mother and the fact that Kikyo wanted something from him.  
_  
'Damn.'_

'_Indeed,_' he felt Sesshomaru's anger over those memories and the fact that Inuyasha knew but could tell that it wasn't really directed at him. If anything the youkai was angry at himself. Inuyasha tried to nose him in comfort but he stepped aside and continued on their way, '_Not now_.'

The thought came with a strange brittle feeling that made Inuyasha picture a rusted sword.

He followed quietly, trying not to think too much. Even with all the progress they'd made, it seemed that it was still a fragile sort of peace they had, and that it'd be easy for him to fuck it up.

He thought about how he'd always seen his brother as this heartless being who wanted nothing more than his demise. But Sesshomaru was so much more than that.

Perhaps it was the 'more' that made the youkai feel so important to him.

'_Don't worry so much,_' Sesshomaru said. Once he decided someone was in his pack he stood by them it was one reason he avoided having anyone so close.

Inuyasha cocked his head as the thoughts he received turned entirely martial in nature with an occasional and obviously unintentional 'shut up' thrown in the mix.

XxXx

Meanwhile, at the base of the mountain, Koga was stretched out on his stomach on top of a boulder, watching as Rin went through her daily lessons. The girl had certainly eased up around him - perhaps it was that mutts 1 and 2 were ok with him, maybe it was growing confidence in her own abilities.

He could probably add to her fighting repertoire, but felt that was probably a bad idea without permission from the older mutt.

Being young, the human girl was absorbing everything she learned and making it her own. Maybe he could be her sparring partner one of these days, if she was ok with that.

Koga glanced over to the far side of camp, Sango and Kagome were sitting close deep in earnest conversation.

Koga lifted his head as he smelled the mutts approaching camp. Inuyasha had much more of a demon scent about him and Koga's ears twitched against the sides of his head in submission for a moment before he controlled his reaction.

He needed to control his shit around Inuyasha. It would be awkward and dangerous enough to tempt the hanyou's demon side alone, but his intended mate was lethal and sometimes carried a scent like jealousy.

Yeahhh, he was gonna let that sleeping dog lie, alright.

XxXx

Inuyasha followed his brother to just outside camp and landed. Sesshomaru's voice came warningly. '_Be careful.'_

'_Huh? Why?' _he sniffed the air, not smelling any threat.

Sesshomaru shook his massive head. _'The pack are very, very small, while you are very, very large. It would be devastatingly easy to end one of them._'

Inuyasha gave a slight whine at the thought and carefully settled his belly on the ground, laying his head down and promising to be still. A few moments later, the pack came out of the trees.

Recognizing Sesshomaru, Kagome was the first to catch on. "Inuyasha?" she asked, coming close and touching his nose. He huffed, almost blowing her down.

They _were_ rather tiny compared to this form.

Sesshomaru moved away a bit as the others fawned over Inuyasha. In a flare of pink light, the youkai stood in his regular form, flexing a residual ache from his claws.

Inuyasha thought he looked rather impressive, standing in the sunset light, facing the breeze.

Sesshomaru glanced at him. '_You are ridiculous.'_

Then his brother warned the others to stand back, gesturing at him to transform. '_You're going to be hungry and tired.'  
_  
Sure enough, the moment he stood in hanyou form, he realized he was starving and so exhausted he was trembling. Luckily, Kagome had just prepared supper.

Inuyasha ate 3 bowls of ramen while Sesshomaru stood nearby, then, when he had found a branch that suited him and settled down, the youkai settled at the base of the same tree.

"We attack the mountain at dawn," Inuyasha said and his brother nodded.

As Rin tucked up under Sesshomaru's steel arm Inuyasha noted that his thoughts were as peaceful as they had been since the spell. Inuyasha was happy too, eager to test his new skills out, damn he'd be fucking invincible.

'_Easy Inu-pup. You know better than that._' Inuyasha huffed in annoyance and sent some rather vulgar images out of spite.

Sesshomaru sent an image of Inuyasha smacking into the tree in light form, '_Arrogance._'

Inuyasha almost fell out of the tree, "You're seriou..." '_Seriously _you're_ lecturing _me _about arrogance?'_

'_When it could get you killed, yes,'_ that carefully blank wall was back.

Inuyasha was about to retort, but then the tightness in that last thought registered. Sesshomaru would be bothered if he fell?

After the past they had, it seemed foreign that the demon would be worried about him. But things were different now. He had to remember that.

The pack had been at his side for a while now, and he knew they'd be devastated if something happened to him. But knowing that his brother would be affected by his loss felt...different.

Inuyasha settled securely on his branch, glancing down to smile at the top of Sesshomaru's head. He closed his eyes, then focused on the blank wall and tried to give the equivalent of a reassuring pat.

_'I promise I'll be careful, aniki.'_


	11. Assault

Chapter 11: Assault

A/N - timewaster is awesome

Warnings: language, Demonyasha causing more problems, violence/fighting

* * *

Sesshomaru didn't sleep - he knew exactly what he would dream about and didn't want those images in his head on the eve of battle. So he was awake when Inuyasha dropped from the tree ready to go at dawn.

The pack indulged in a quiet breakfast, Miroku smelled of fear and arousal, alternately flirting with and holding Sango. Sango also smelled of fear and didn't reject the Monks advances as she normally did though she didn't seem to reciprocate his feelings.

"Sango you're making me nervous stop that," Kagome whined as the slayer checked her equipment for the fifth time with an emphasis on the poison antidote.

Sango sighed and put her things away carefully. Kagome herself was a mess of scents, fear, anticipation, grief, she leaned close to Inuyasha.

"Kagome I..."

'_Comfort her._' Sesshomaru made a point of ignoring them. The wolf rose from where he'd been talking to his two vassals and approached him.

Inuyasha cringed inside as he gave Kagome a brief one-armed hug that he hoped couldn't be misinterpreted as more than comfort from a friend. "It'll be ok, Kagome. We got this."

As soon as her scent had settled, he moved away, seeing Koga talking to Sesshomaru. He pricked his ears forward, then his intended mate glanced up at him.

"Look muttface over there is an idiot but..." the Wolf's scent fluctuated a faint trace of fear more apprehension than anything else entered and left. He was scared or nervous at least and trying to hide it, from his followers most likely.

"Look I ain't dumb enough to try appealing to your 'compassion' but you're an arrogant bastard so I'll appeal to that. Muttface might not care if you come or not but personally I want me and mine to get out of that mountain alive and," his voice lowered so that even his followers back by the campfire wouldn't hear, "I know the chances of that go way up if both of you're there so please ignore him just for today."

Sesshomaru nodded. The wolf hovered another moment and Sesshomaru stretched his claws. The wolf returned to his people smelling uncertain and wary.

_'Idiot. As though you wouldn't be enough.'_ Sesshomaru thought amused. _'You'll want to keep an eye on that one. He's scared, it will cloud his judgement.'_

Inuyasha nodded. _'I'll watch him. But once he's fighting, he's usually good.'_

He saw the youkai nod in return. Flattered that Sesshomaru thought he'd be enough, he turned so his path intercepted the wolf's. "Hey, mangy wolf! Ready to kick some ass? Don't make me save your scrawny butt today."

Koga's scent calmed significantly as they playfully shoved each other. "Yeah, muttface, whatever you say. I'll be the one hauling you and your fleas to safety, albino runt."

Chuckling, Inuyasha moved among the others, making sure both Kirara and Ah-Un had been cared for, and getting everyone cheered up.

Sesshomaru watched as his brother performed the duties of a pack Alpha flawlessly. He was getting everyone ready, making sure they were neither afraid nor too eager. It was...impressive.

The hanyou's head snapped up at the thought, the link flooding with surprise and pleasure. But Inuyasha was determined not to be distracted by the compliment and just sent him a smile before refocusing on the pack.

As they approached the mountain Inuyasha could feel the aura dragging on him, he felt tired, his movements sluggish and a rising nausea was making him dizzy. He glanced over and saw Koga gritting his teeth, Sesshomaru showed nothing but the link was filled with disquiet while Miroku's head was bowed in exhaustion.

"A purifying aura," Miroku grated.

"Wonderful," Inuyasha replied. "Can you do anything about it?"

"Too strong."

Inuyasha sighed, "You're a monk what else are you good for?"

"Rescuing damsels," Miroku replied confidently.

"That's my job!" Koga and Inuyasha shot back.

Pain cut through the link and he looked ahead to see Sesshomaru staring curiously at the air in front of him. He swept his steel hand through it and pain again shot through the link.

"There's a high chance that any demon passing through this barrier will be purified," the Youkai said

"Miroku and I can enter and try to destroy the source of the energy," Sango offered.

"I can go too," Kagome said.

"No I'm sure they can handle it," Inuyasha said. He wanted to be there to protect the weaker human if possible.

"We'll be back shortly," Miroku said.

They disappeared into the barrier and Inuyasha was surprised to feel a hint of worry in the link, as the seven of them settled down to wait.

His demon was rumbling discontentedly, but he focused on casually thinking of all the times Miroku and Sango had held their own in battle, against overwhelming odds, even standing up to Sesshomaru himself.

The link flickered with a thread of amusement. _'Trying to reassure me?'_

'_Nope. Just thinking to myself.'_

_'Ahh, I see. Very well. Carry on.'_

Inuyasha smiled to himself, running over the pack's victories against enemies. Pleased that Sesshomaru actually cared about the pack even if he didn't show it.

'_So they aren't completely useless?'_ it was half a joke but there was some useful information in Inuyasha's memories.

'_Just Miroku,' _Inuyasha laughed and Koga looked at him askance.

The hours dragged on and Inuyasha's worry became more pronounced as Kagome cuddled closer.

"Screw it! You guys can keep an eye Kagome right?"

"Of course!" Koga said, tail wagging.

Inuyasha noticed Sesshomaru following him, '_The wolf is more than capable of handling it alone.'  
_  
That wall came between their thoughts as Sesshomaru walked into the barrier but from the faint echoes of pain it seemed like it would be unpleasant and Inuyasha braced himself before sprinting in. Sesshomaru didn't react as he screamed but he felt the sympathy.

"AAAARRRGGGGHH!" Goodgod what the unholy hell is this? It felt like he was being ripped apart.

'_If you wish to turn back, I will find them,_' the thought was calm though with hints of pain.

Inuyasha shook his head.

' _Not...a...chance_,' gods he was even panting in his thoughts. Zaps of static danced over his and his brother's bodies as he made it to the youkai's side. They moved deeper into the mountain, and he was soon struggling to breathe.

**_This isn't good._** Inuyasha was surprised to hear a whine in his demon's words.

_It's ok, we can do this._

Suddenly, his demon went quiet, and he felt markedly better. "Oh thank the gods!" He turned to smile at Sesshomaru, who was staring at him.

He realized he could still feel pain in the link as his intended mate lifted the steel arm towards his face. _'Look at your reflection_.'

Inuyasha frowned, looking at his distorted image in the shiny metal.

He was human.

'_Fuck!'_

'_If this is a barrier perhaps you can return to form once we pass through. If it's an aura...' _Sesshomaru knew he wouldn't be able to make Inuyasha retreat but the image of his brother's human body sprawled on the cave floor bloody was making him seriously consider attempting... _'Down!'_

Inuyasha fell flat feeling steel bit his shoulder as Sesshomaru spun drawing Tokijin and clashed with a large two-handed blade.

'_Bankotsu,_' Inuyasha thought staring.

'_Get back!'_

Sesshomaru swept Tokijin down in a graceful sweep towards the mercenary's legs while Inuyasha scampered behind him. As Bankotsu moved to block, he drew and slashed at his head with Gekko. The lightning fast move caught the mercenary off guard and he leaped back a red line forming from cheek to nose.

"Leave or die," Sesshomaru said.

Bankotsu laughed, "You think I fear you? Bluff all you want, this miasma's so thick you can barely stand. I could do nothing and you'd collapse eventually."

Sesshomaru smiled and flicked Gekko. Though the attack likely wouldn't work on a resurrected human Bankotsu ducked instinctively and brought his sword up to guard. Tokijin met the larger sword freezing it in place and Sesshomaru stepped into the attack sweeping Gekko up in an awkward underhand cut and sliced the mercenary from groin to skull. The body fell to either side of the blade.

'_Are you alright Inu-pup?'_ he asked feeling blood drip down his chest from where the tip of Bankotsu's first swing had bit deep above the armor.

Inuyasha felt useless and in the way, but couldn't bring himself to consider leaving. '_I'm fine. I'll be fine. Don't worry about me, ok? He has friends on this bullshit excuse for a mountain_.'

He called up everything he knew about each of the 'brothers', trying to keep his thoughts organized so Sesshomaru could see. The youkai nodded, then paused at the image of Jakotsu. Inuyasha blushed as his memory flickered through the resurrected human's outlandish flirting.

_'You have many admirers, Inu-pup.'_

'_Yeah, I'm _not_ interested. He creeps me out.' _He shuddered, sensing amusement._ 'Shut up and let's go.'  
_  
Again, he saw the image of himself lying on the cave floor, surrounded by blood as his unseeing eyes stared.

"Hey!" he said, impulsively catching the demon's hand for a moment, "I don't plan on dying in this shithole, ok? I've survived my human nights for decades without anyone watching out for me."

He released Sesshomaru's hand and smiled, seeing the image fade. '_I'll be fine. Now, let's go._'

Sesshomaru huffed, annoyed that the pup was trying to reassure him, more annoyed it was working, '_Overconfident little whelp.'  
_  
Inuyasha rolled his eyes. They moved on then Sesshomaru cut down a left side corridor. '_I smell the humans.'  
_  
They exited into a huge cavern covered with strange fleshy, demon-scented masses. A few hundred feet above, Kagura was arguing with an obviously wounded Miroku.

Sesshomaru watched the display feeling Inuyasha's fear for the monk and frustration at not being able to do anything. At the same time he didn't want to risk leaving him alone with the fleshy things while he intervened.

_'What are the chances of you hiding in the tunnel while I collect the monk?'  
_  
'_Go fuck yourself.'_

Sesshomaru nodded.

'_Hold tight_,' he tossed the end of his fluff at Inuyasha.

Inuyasha grabbed on with both hands, clenching his jaw as Sesshomaru launched himself into the air and his own feet left the ground. Highly aware of his current mortality, he watched the speeding walls as his brother flew up to the level Miroku was on.

His heart nearly stopped when he saw Sango laying behind the monk.

"Dance of Blades!"

Inuyasha leapt off the fluff, tackling Miroku to the ground as a white scythe swept through the spot he'd been standing.

"Get her out of here!" he snarled in the human's face as Sesshomaru began deflecting the sharpened wind attacks.

Sesshomaru positioned himself between Kagura and the humans, deflecting with both blades and his steel arm. Not being able to dodge was an annoyance but the sting of the blades that got through his guard did little but distract from the fire of the miasma tearing him apart.

'_You too,_' he moved to cover the humans as they retreated into the tunnel carrying Sango between them. Once there Miroku collapsed in pain. '_How bad?'_

Inuyasha rolled Miroku onto his back, parting the black and purple robes that were streaked with blood. He breathed a sigh of relief. '_Not _too_ bad. He needs treatment, but he won't die._'

_'And Sango? I don't smell blood or poison.'  
_  
Inuyasha patted Miroku's face. "Hey! What happened to Sango?"

"Hi-Hiraikotsu..."

Inuyasha cursed. "She got hit with it?"

Miroku nodded before falling unconscious.

"Shit," Inuyasha said and he tried to transform, to call his demon back. He felt his marks itch as they return then a shock of pain ran through him and his demon yelped in pain and disappear. He tried again and felt his demon quivering in fear. _Come on you coward_.

**_I'm powerful, always so powerful I-I don't like this_**, his demon whimpered.

_So's Sesshomaru and if he's standing there, so can we. Come on don't make me look bad!_ He dragged his demon kicking and screaming back and swayed with pain as his demon blood reacted to the aura.

Sesshomaru nodded at him in hanyou form, '_Well done._' a bit of sadness snuck through that wall.

_'Spare...me the...pity,'_ Inuyasha panted.

'_Of course,'_ Sesshomaru bent to pick up Miroku as Inuyasha got Sango. '_If we get into trouble take these two and run.'  
_  
_No!'_

'_You can't fight. I will be able to defend...myself if I don't have...to worry about you three._'

Inuyasha clenched his jaw, hating the thought of leaving his brother. '_Fine. But you fucking _promise_ me you'll make it out if I have to leave you.'  
_  
Surprise flickered through the link, then, _I promise._

It occurred to Inuyasha with a warm feeling in his pain wracked body that Sesshomaru had, in the heat of the moment, admitted to worrying not just about him but the pack as a whole.

_Shut up.'_

They had traveled a short ways up the tunnel, when the scent of demons got stronger.

Inuyasha's pain was flooding the link and Sesshomaru wondered if running was even going to be an option as he looked at the pale, shaking hanyou.

An image of something he didn't think was physically possible demonstrated Inuyasha's opinion of his concerns.

He handed Sango to the pup who gasped at the increased weight then they crossed a four-way intersection. As soon as they did, demons boiled from the crossing tunnel and more cut off their advance. Sesshomaru flicked Gekko and spun to face the way they'd come as a claw raked his back. The bolts sprayed left to right purifying a swath of demons in front of them as he brought Tokijin to bear on those behind.

"GO!" he leaped back dodging as best he could in the narrow confines of the tunnel.

'_Demons!'_ Inuyasha thought. He gave Gekko a blind flick behind him knowing it wouldn't hurt the humans. '_Thanks.'_

The aura was taking its toll, slowing his movements even as the pain drove him, every wave of agony having an easy and immediate target for retaliation. Tokijin and Gekko tore through the hordes until the sheer press of numbers forced him to leap back. A flash of his half-regrown whip cut the front rank down, the pain of the still healing wound lost among everything else. He leaped back again, falling to one knee, damn aura. He raised Tokijin in a guard and flicked Gekko the bolts burned through demons to give him some breathing room and he forced himself to his feet.

He ran stumbling slightly from the effects of the aura before turning in a section of unbroken tunnel, setting a stance and waiting for the demons to catch up. He was panting, fighting to stay standing against blood loss and the aura but if this was going to be a last stand he was damn well going to make it a good one.

_'Clear...we're...out._' Inuyasha panted his 'voice' vague and distant

_'On my way.'_ He abandoned the position and bolted for the exit as fast as he could manage.

Inuyasha burst free of the tunnel and the barrier, right into the midst of the pack. He handed Miroku and Sango over quickly. "Take them!"

Sesshomaru had 'said' he was on his way but there was no sign of him. Inuyasha reached out, only sensing _Run, run, run._

The thought of his brother falling enraged him. **_We're going back in?_**

_For him? Always._

He lunged into the tunnel, ignoring the burn.

There was Sesshomaru, running towards him. _'Inu-pup...'_

The link was weak.

Sesshomaru stumbled. Inuyasha caught him, and the next moment, they were at the exit of the tunnel.

**_There's so much blood._**

Inuyasha drew Tetsusaiga and faced the tunnel. "Wind Scar!"

Demons shrieked in pain, their death cries echoing as the tunnel collapsed.

Sesshomaru struggled to keep his feet, '_Good job Inu-pup thank you.'_

He hadn't had a battle that intense since the fight over Tetsusaiga, he hadn't run away from one since then either.

Inuyasha walked away from the tunnel and Sesshomaru was glad to see he was in full demon form, not too much the worse for wear then.

_'Nope,'_ he laid a comforting hand on Sesshomaru's shoulder, pulling it away when Sesshomaru growled low and threatening.

_'N-not in front...of the...wolf.'_ the thought was coated in apologies for growling.

Inuyasha's red eyes turned on Koga awe badly concealed in his eyes, reeking of submission and jealousy. _Oh yeah the wolf_, Inuyasha smiled.

Most of the pack was focused on Miroku and Sango, leaving nobody to see the way Inuyasha focused on Koga.

Nobody except Sesshomaru.

Smelling of arousal and dominance, Inuyasha stepped right into the ookami's personal space. Koga seemed frozen, ears flat against the sides of his head and tail tucked down.

Sesshomaru caught his breath, the pain forgotten. '_Inuyasha!'_

For the first time since the spell had been placed on them, it felt like he couldn't reach his brother.

He sensed the demon's pleasure as one clawed hand grabbed Koga's tail and one grabbed his ponytail, tilting the wolf's head. Inuyasha kissed Koga possessively, thoughts full of the demon's need to dominate.

Sesshomaru felt pain lance through his chest, and at the same moment, Inuyasha broke the kiss. Glowing red and gold eyes met his and widened.

The demon hesitated, and that was enough for Inuyasha. A roar of rage filled the link. _You God-damn fucking _bastard_! Why?_

The red cleared, revealing a furious-looking Inuyasha, who released Koga.

_You_ fucker!

**_I told you, I need to dominate._**

_I don't give a flying fuck! I told you-_

**_You said to leave Kagome alone._**

Sesshomaru looked away, part of him wanted to leave, but he couldn't in his condition. Damn it all.

"Sesshomaru?"

Inuyasha was at his side, the hanyou's ears flicking nervously. He couldn't handle this right now. Sesshomaru forcefully sent an image of the night he'd struck his brother. He didn't intend to ever do that again, but the ploy worked - Inuyasha flattened his ears and backed away, eyes dropping from his.

Space. Space was good right now.

Inuyasha picked up the need for space, about as close to begging as he could imagine the youkai ever coming so he gathered the others and led them down the mountain as far as the tether would allow, placing them in a small grove of trees near the base.

Kagome was openly crying, Koga fighting the urge to whimper caught between the rapey hanyou and a taiyoukai with every reason to kill him. He may talk a big game but if Sesshomaru came after him he'd be testing those shards in his legs. He didn't think it would help and a small whimper broke free.

Inuyasha was furious with himself and his demon, again Sesshomaru had gotten fucked up helping him only to get screwed-or not as it were-in return. He reached out but felt only a blank wall like those slick concrete buildings from Kagome's time.

Sesshomaru sank down leaning his back against the rock of mountain and began licking at the numerous physical wounds he'd taken with an obsessive focus. As soon as he could no longer smell the others, knowing he had the strongest nose, he stopped and leaned his head back against the rock wall. Exhausted and truly thoroughly sick of everything, so much for fucking triumph, so much for earning Inuyasha's respect back. He closed his eyes put what was left of his energy into maintaining that wall and let the tears fall.

XxXx

Inuyasha trembled fiercely in his tree. It'd been hours since the...incident, and Sesshomaru still had that solid wall up. Occasionally, he caught the barest sniffs of pain through the link. Sesshomaru was deeply hurt, in body and otherwise.

_How could you?_ he demanded for the hundredth time.

And for the hundredth time, the demon replied, **_I wasn't specifically aiming to hurt him, you know. If I thought he would've tolerated being submissive - especially in front of everyone - I would've kissed him instead. But you're not even allowed to think about kissing him in private, with you being submissive!  
_**  
He had no comeback for that.

**_Look, I'd even be willing to take turns, ok? But in spite of what he said, I don't think he's willing to be bottom. Ever. And I might kiss someone against their will, but even I have a few morals._**

_Thank the gods for that small mercy. How noble of you, to be above forcing someone._

He sensed a sigh. The demon's defense of his actions had steadily been becoming less vehement.

_Look, I still want him as a mate. Just him. We need to make this right._

Rin was demanding to know where Sesshomaru was, and only calmed when Inuyasha explained that he'd stayed behind to keep watch.

XxXx

Sesshomaru couldn't let himself sleep, because then the wall would come down. But he was so tired and in pain and he just wanted...he wasn't even sure exactly how to word what he wanted, but apparently, the gods were not smiling on him.

What did he have to do for Inuyasha's demon to accept him? The thought was almost laughable - he'd _never_ worried about someone's acceptance. Not since father had died.

He drew an arm across his eyes and dried his face utterly disgusted with himself, the situation, everything and returned to licking those wounds he could. The quicker he could recover and get off this damn mountain the better, then another thought occurred to him. They hadn't taken down the barrier, they would have to mount another assault. He almost laughed, the one time he actually wanted to run away and he couldn't. Because he needed to kill Naraku and more importantly because even after everything he couldn't let Inuyasha face that place alone.

Yeah not caring about anything was easier - he'd had it right the first time. Gekko pulsed. "Shut up."

He realized that he couldn't spare energy to heal demonically. Inuyasha should rest the pack at least a day though by tomorrow he should have it together enough to drop the wall and sleep then heal. It wouldn't be perfect but it would have to do. He intended to be ready to hit the mountain again as soon as the pack was.

XxXx

Inuyasha felt a wave of disgust and perked up but no...the wall was still there. His ears drooped. He saw Koga looking at him curiously and rolled over on the branch.

Then he realized something, and punched the tree, cursing under his breath. He jumped down from his branch and stalked towards the wolf. Koga looked like he didn't know whether to stand up to him or cower in fear.

He stopped in front of the ookami, who wouldn't meet his eyes and had his tail tucked down, but was growling warningly with his hands balled into fists.

"I'm sorry, Koga."

Electric blue eyes lifted to his as the growl stopped. "Huh?"

He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. What I did was wrong. I know how my demon side makes you react, and I'm a total jackass for taking advantage of that. You...I mean...we're friends now, y'know? But even if we weren't, that still wasn't right. So I'm sorry, Koga."

The wolf blinked a handful of times, then smiled, his tail waving ever-so-slightly. "Ok, Inuyasha. Apology accepted."

He nodded, then fled back to his branch.

Inuyasha curled on his branch shivering and hoped morning would make things look better but he knew it wouldn't. God he was an ass.

Kagome finally cried herself to sleep her head in Sango's lap. Sango's head still ached despite Kagome's magic pills but she couldn't bring herself to wake the poor girl. Her first love_ had_ basically tried to do it with everyone in camp. Sango knew how that felt, it occurred to her that ironically Sesshomaru must as well though she supposed he was handling it better. To make matters worse she really liked having Kagome's head there and it was highly likely that one of the demons would notice if she didn't extricate herself soon.

Shippo curled up with a nervous Rin against Ah-Un. Usually after a successful battle everyone was happy, the dismal atmosphere and confusing scents were freaking him out badly.

The next morning dawned gray and drizzly. Perfect for Inuyasha's mood.

He sat on his branch, unmoving, as the persistent light rain plastered his hair to his skull. He watched over the camp, occasionally blinking rain from his lashes. Or maybe tears. He didn't know anymore.

His demon hadn't spoken since yesterday afternoon.

With the wall in place, he wasn't expecting his brother to walk into camp a couple hours after sunrise.

His whole body twitched with the urge to jump down and go greet Sesshomaru, and possibly prostrate himself, beg for forgiveness, offer his life...but the presence of the wall told him he wasn't welcome yet.

So he stayed still, one knee drawn up to his chest with his arm resting on it, only his eyes moved as they followed the youkai crossing the camp.

Sesshomaru walked up to Rin and Shippo scampered away.

Rin smiled, "I'm glad you're back Sesshomaru-sama." she said and he could smell the worry on her. He walked away from Ah-Un and she followed, they were soon going through forms as though nothing had happened, Sesshomaru working the soreness from his body, and Rin instantly relaxing as she went through the familiar motions. When they were done he settled down to sleep carefully clearing his mind before dropping the wall. Rin opted to sit next to him and practice meditating.

Miroku looked at Sango sleeping off her ordeal curled around Kagome and wondered if that was how she felt when he was with another girl. It kinda sucked.

Koga cautiously approached Inuyasha, "I assume we're moving on the mountain again soon?"

Inuyasha perked up when the wall came down and answered Koga distractedly, "Maybe. We'll see."

He slipped down off the branch, oblivious to any looks he may have gotten as he circled wide, going to a tree only a little closer to the youkai than his original one.

Cautiously, he moved from branch to branch until he was as close as he dared. Sesshomaru's thoughts indicated he'd fallen asleep, hazy and muted and disjointed.

_Thank the gods! He actually came back and is ok enough to sleep here!_

He didn't look too closely at the thoughts, content that the wall had been dropped. He settled on a branch and sighed, closing his own eyes.

An image flickered in his mind. Sesshomaru, leaning against a rock wall, and crying softly in a way he hadn't since he was a pup. He swallowed and locked it away; Sesshomaru _probably_ wouldn't want him to know about that.

His demon laughed, **_You want to submit to _****that****_?_**

_I'll find a way to fix this, I promise_.


	12. A Moment of Peace

12: A Moment of Peace

**A/N:** Created with the fabulous and woefully overworked SesshomaruFreak. Hey it isn't my fault that we work so well together or keep having brilliant ideas :P.

A/n - created with the amazing timewaster123456789, this wouldn't exist without her

* * *

Sesshomaru woke in the afternoon, rose with put on grace and went to hunt. He ate where his kill fell and began the process of letting his demon energy heal his body.

Back at camp Miroku tried to sit beside Sango to eat lunch but gave up. For some reason whenever Kagome was around, and it seemed like she always was, he felt like a third wheel. He got that Kagome was going through a rough time and saw Sango as a big sister but the slayer didn't have to _completely_ ignore him to help Kagome.

"Man I don't like this," Hakkaku whispered.

"I know but it's our best shot at taking out Naraku," Ginta replied.

"It's our _only_ shot or we wouldn't be here," Koga said. The other two stared, knowing how serious things had to be for their alpha to drop the bravado. They returned to their silence with Kirara, Jaken and Shippo all hiding from the mounting tension with them.

It was palpable now - the friction between the Alphas, the apprehension everyone felt about hitting the mountain again, the odd sort of tension between the monk and the females...

Inuyasha flicked an ear, staring morosely in the direction that Sesshomaru had gone. The demon hadn't acknowledged him in word or thought since the fiasco with Koga.

Sango was trying to focus on practical things, but her mind kept straying, taking her body along. Kagome was mostly innocent, and she had the urge to _teach_ the younger woman everything she knew.

The next dawn Sesshomaru returned to camp to find Jaken hiding with the wolf's subpack and Shippo.

"Jaken. Seek a witch," he provided a description and left as Jaken scampered away. He didn't spare a glance for the wolf and could smell the relief all the way back to Ah-Un. Well at least that was still as it should be. Now it was just a matter of waiting until they made their move.

His eyes moved toward Inuyashsa's tree. The pup...he was torn between knowing it was his own fault for turning his brother down and just wanting to cut his losses, let Inuyasha do what he pleased and stay out of the way. Then again it wasn't what Inuyasha wanted - he even assumed he'd have to submit, it was all the demon.

He had to stop thinking about that it was making the wall waver. _'Can't take it?'_ his mother's voice echoed in memory. He watched the rising sun refusing to hang his head, there would be blood to spill soon.

Inuyasha felt his ears droop in defeat. The wall was back in place, and he'd just heard Sesshomaru tell Jaken to find the witch. There was only one reason he'd do so.

His brother didn't want the link anymore.

He sighed, knowing he should've expected this. Still, it hurt.  
If it wasn't for his stupid demon, his theory of understanding each other better could've worked. Now Sesshomaru was rejecting him, in a way. This pain was strange; it felt familiar, but new at the same time.

He focused on the wall between them for a bit, hoping it'd come down. Without the link being open, and with Sesshomaru not speaking to him, he didn't know what his once-intended-but-maybe-not-anymore mate was thinking.

It felt like the past.

Sesshomaru approached Inuyasha, "When do we move?" the words were cold and clipped.

Inuyasha hesitated, trying to smother the hurt and slight fear he felt - Sesshomaru sounded exactly like his old self.

Part of him wanted to react in a 'two can play at that game' kind of way, but the rest of him was just tired and sad. He glanced up at the mountain, trying to keep it together. If they attempted to take the stone fortress, his head _needed_ to be in the game.

He set his jaw and gripped Tetsusaiga's hilt. "Now."

Sesshomaru nodded, a part of him wondered if the rest of the pack was ready but then that wasn't his problem. The six of them went back up the mountain and why Kagome was with them he neither knew nor cared. Kagome, Koga, Ah-Un it made no difference.

Kagome rode Kirara in front of Sango and Miroku. Inuyasha had tried to dissuade her but she was determined regardless of the risks, Sango's hands clutching her hips for 'balance' reminded her why. She didn't want to see the woman hurt again if she could prevent it.

The three demons ran in front, though Koga was panting hard. As they approached the entrance Inuyasha moaned in pain and stumbled, Sesshomaru reached out instinctively to steady him and glared a moment before continuing on. Koga screamed and Inuyasha dragged him along as the humans jumped off Kirara to continue on foot.

Inuyasha snarled as his head pounded with his demon's helpless rage.

**_I hate this place!_**  
_  
Hate Naraku more!_

**Naraku!**

Inuyasha pulled his blood forward to maintain hanyou form. _Don't go kissing anyone afterwards!_

**_Not even him?_**

Inuyasha realised his inner demon was trying to make a joke, but his first reaction was to imagine Sesshomaru striking him for daring to kiss him. ._..No. Not even him._

They plunged into the mountain, destroying demons left and right.

Inuyasha didn't have time to be relieved that the wall lowered just enough for them to fight seamlessly together.

Sesshomaru leaped off the tunnel wall slicing through a trio of flying demons while the others fought hand to hand below with Kagome standing behind the line shooting.

_'__No windscar_,' he reminded feeling Inuyasha's exhaustion.

None of them had fully recovered and Inuyasha was flagging almost as bad as the wolf at that point. When the last demon fell they stood panting.

_'We should...split up. We can't...fight all packed...together like this,'_ Inuyasha thought.

_'Good idea.'_

"Miroku, Sango, with me," Inuyasha said.

"Me too!" Kagome cried and Sango flashed her a smile. Inuyasha sighed.

"Fine Miroku go with them," he gestured at Sesshomaru and Koga.

Sesshomaru moved down the tunnel and looked over the others. Miroku looked tired but okay, Koga's eyes were dull with pain and he stumbled over a rock. He focused back on the tunnel smelling demons ahead. Definitely better off alone. Pain from the aura stabbed at his muscles with every move but he relished it, any distraction was welcome at the moment.

_'Found...it.'_ Inuyasha panted in his thoughts.

'_Soon.'_ Best to take care of this group of enemies first.

Inuyasha focused on the crystal-like formation in the middle of the cavern he'd stumbled into. It rather looked like a giant shard of the Jewel and pulsated softly with power. With each pulse, he felt his demon being pushed back and forth.

**_This...bullshit...destroy...outta here_**.

Inuyasha concentrated on securing his demon, even as he searched for a way to destroy the Crystal. He drew Tetsusaiga. _'C'mon, we need to do this together.'_

_XxXx_

"Argh!" Muscles spasmed made worse by the aura as a spear like appendage took Sesshomaru through the back of his right shoulder and he fell to one knee. Lashing back with Gekko to slice through the thing he rose in the same motion and flicked his whip to dispatch half a dozen demons.

"Got ya'" Miroku called throwing out sutras and covering his back. Soon the fight was over and Sesshomaru being the demon, picked up Koga.

"Well done monk."

"I'll take him if you want?"

He very much did but it wouldn't be practical and besides it'd be admitting to the monk that Inuyasha's actions had affected him. He shook his head in disgust and turned, rushing to join the others. Miroku followed panting and debated on whether it was worth his trouble to offer to pull the tentacle thing out of the wounded demon's back.

Picking up worry in the monk's scent, Sesshomaru glanced back, "What?"

Miroku pointed at his shoulder and spoke hesitantly. "There's...still a thing, like part of a tentacle, in your shoulder. You want me to..."

Sesshomaru sighed; no wonder that wound was throbbing, "Yes. Quickly."

A moment later, he felt the pressure release and the throbbing eased, "My thanks."

In the cavern, Inuyasha snarled in frustration. He, Kagome, and Sango had all attempted, together and individually, to break or purify the crystal, with no success.

Sesshomaru, and Miroku joined with the others and a numb, exhausted sort of fear and anger flashed through the link when Inuyasha saw Koga.

_'Unconscious.' _Sesshomaru thought setting the wolf down.

"He's fine, the aura got to him," Miroku said breathing hard.

Relief filled the link, quickly followed by a rundown of all the ways they'd tried to destroy the crystal.

"Okay lets start with pure demonic energy it's a holy object after all," Miroku offered. Sesshomaru glared at the monk but drew Tokijin and let his eyes turn red. There wasn't room for his true form he but he could still call the blood forth and he clenched his jaw to keep from crying out as the aura reacted. He felt Inuyasha's fear but the pup did the same, screaming in pain, then they attacked Tokijin biting deep into the crystal followed by Wind Scar.

The energy flickered, weakening enough that both brothers felt the effect lessening. But the crystal continued to pulse defiantly, even as Koga groaned and stirred.

Miroku frowned, cautiously approaching the crystal. He threw a sutra onto it, resulting in a flash of lightning as the effect on the demons weakened further.

The monk stuck his staff in the ground and pulled out two handfuls of sutras. "Inuyasha, Sesshomaru. Try attacking again as soon as these make contact."

Inuyasha nodded, feeling exhausted agreement in the link.

Miroku frowned in concentration, then flung all the sutras at the crystal. An instant later, Tokijin and the Wind Scar struck the same area.

Koga rose to his feet, watching as cracks raced over the surface of the formation. His demonic energy blossomed, and he sensed the brothers' flare as well, as the crystal burst and collapsed.

Before they could celebrate, the walls began shaking.

"C'mon, guys, we gotta get out!" Inuyasha yelled.

They all ran down the tunnel, Koga racing in the lead and easily vanquishing any lowly vermin that dared to show their face, while Inuyasha and Sesshomaru brought up the rear. Any demons creeping up on them were either purified by Gekko or 'Iron Reaver'd into smithereens.

Finally, Koga called out, "Almost there, guys! Just a little further!"  
Up ahead, the light of day could be seen.

They burst from the tunnel, panting and struggling to catch their breath. Sesshomaru caught Inuyasha's scent and red eyes and pushed himself off the rock he was leaning against. Inuyasha approached scratched and exhausted, but none the worse for wear, his ears twitching nervously as his eyes faded to red and gold but Sesshomaru shook his head.

_'I would have submitted. I'm glad I didn't. Take your pick, being with you is like killing a toad demon; any filth can do it.'  
_  
With that he began descending the mountain, tough words aside he had no desire to see what happened next.

Koga took his hands off his knees and watched Inuyasha warily.

Inuyasha stared, absolutely floored. He knew he'd fucked up, a lot, but had he deserved that?! Confused and stunned, he felt anger rising like lava. He hadn't done anything to anyone this time! Didn't that count for something?

The youkai was walking away, but had only gotten about twenty feet when he halted mid-step. Inuyasha felt a tug in his midsection as Sesshomaru forced another step.

The tether.

Now well and truly pissed, Inuyasha braced himself, focusing hard on the invisible thing binding them. When it was clear that his brother wasn't going to be able to walk away this time, he focused on that gods-forsaken wall.  
_  
'Sesshomaru, don't. Don't walk away, don't shut me out.'_

Koga frowned curiously. Sesshomaru had stopped, looking as if he simply couldn't go any further. Inuyasha was braced as if fighting Miroku's Wind Tunnel.

Something odd was going on here.

But at least muttface hadn't tried to kiss anybody.

"Uhhh, Inuyasha?"

Fiery gold-and-red eyes slid to him, and he scratched his head nervously. "Uhhh, you want me to take the others down to camp?"

The demonized version of his friend nodded sharply, and he jumped to obey, quickly rounding up the humans, who seemed oblivious to the weird happenings between the dog demons.

Inuyasha waited for everyone to be out of range before approaching Sesshomaru. His thoughts were whirling.  
_  
This is _your_ fault! You need to make it right!_  
**_  
And how the fuck do you expect me to do that?_**

Inuyasha tried to wall off his thoughts as he sent his demon a suggestion.

**_Ahh shit. Really? That's gonna suuuck._**

_We deserve it._

**_Fine._**

X

Sesshomaru hadn't moved a muscle since realizing Inuyasha was using the tether against him. He had ignored the argument, staying behind his wall.

Inuyasha came to his side, smelling of full demon, and he balled his hands into fists.

Suddenly, his brother was in front of him, dropping to his knees. Inuyasha folded all the way down until his forehead rested on the stone.

What-?

_Make it right._

Sesshomaru sensed some sort of hesitation, and one of Inuyasha's hands went under him. He sensed the intent just before he caught the scent of blood and a pained snarl filled the air.

The demonized hanyou had just sank his claws into his own stomach.  
_  
Make it right!_

**_Ow! Ok!_**

There was a short pause, then,** "Sesshomaru-youkai, please forgive me. I swear I won't do it again. I won't go to anyone else...even though that means I'll probably be celibate for who knows_-"_****_  
_**  
Another snarl filled the air as Inuyasha dug his claws further in.

**"Ow oww fuck! Ok, I'm sorry! That doesn't matter, though. What matters is that we both want you as our mate. I just..._"_****_  
_**  
The claws twitched warningly, and the demon's rough voice continued, "**I know I fucked up. I know you won't ever submit, and you probably don't want to be our mate anymore, but I need you to know that I really am sorry."  
**  
"Inu-pup stop!" Sesshomaru commanded horrified by the damage the pup was doing. Inuyasha obeyed pulling his claw free. Sesshomaru reached down, pulled Inuyasha to his feet and inspected him coldly.

Then deciding that he wasn't about to die he turned away, shoulders slumped, exhausted in every conceivable way.

_'It isn't your fault. I'm the one who turned you away, you didn't deserve that. I meant what I said though, I'm no carrion bird and you've already been picked over,'_ the wall wavered and he strengthened it again. Damn it.

He wanted Inuyasha to think he was just angry, he didn't want his pity or guilt he just wanted him to go away and let the wounds scar over.

Inuyasha stiffened slightly at the 'picked over' line, but relaxed with a long sigh. No matter what Sesshomaru said or did from here on out, it wouldn't change his resolve to not screw this up any further.

Though the wall was in place, he sensed anger and a distinct impression of 'go away'.

_'Ok. I'll go. You'll know where to find me.'  
_  
He headed down the mountain, surprised that he got nearly a quarter-mile away before feeling the tug of the tether. He waited until it slackened a bit, then kept going, making sure he stayed at the end of the invisible bond to give Sesshomaru as much space as he could.

Sesshomaru followed as far back as the tether would allow. He contemplated circling the camp then dismissed it and strode across to Ah-Un. Wishing Jaken would hurry up and return. Maybe he'd go hunting for him soon. Except the tether would prevent that.

"How big of a shit storm did you create?" Koga asked staring at the hanyou's bleeding stomach.

Inuyasha shrugged at the wolf's question, focused on his brother's thoughts. '_If you need to hunt him down, I'll go with you - I can keep my distance.'  
_  
To prove his word, he moved outside the camp a ways, leaving enough slack that Sesshomaru could leave camp on the other side.

_'Just let me know if we're going to look for Jaken,'_ then he shut down his thoughts as much as he could, only focusing on the trees around him and working on building a wall like the youkai had.

'_Not tonight._'

Those two words, said in a near whisper, either not trying or not able to hide the fatigue, were the most defeated he'd ever heard his brother sound and it made his chest ache.

This was so fucked, so different from the vision of them leading the pack side by side that Sesshomaru had shown him.

_I swear I will burn your stripes off_, rage and pain shot the thought through. Seriously what was the pup's problem? Even the armor smith wasn't that sadistic. Sesshomaru immediately kicked himself for the whiny thought and dragged the wall back up.

Inuyasha was glad he'd left the camp. He jumped to his feet and attacked the trees nearby, using claw and strength to reduce nearly an acre of forest to kindling.

It wasn't like he was _trying_ to be a source of more...whatever to the youkai! He didn't _try_ to cause pain or anger, but no matter what he did, it was wrong.

Panting, he sat down to meditate, deciding he'd rather deal with his own shitty memories than spend another _second_ in the mind of someone who, just a few nights ago, had thought of him as 'garbage'.

Once he was able to sink into the meditation, it was surprisingly easy to build a wall.

Sesshomaru felt Inuyasha raging and tried to think 'good' and 'he deserves it' but mostly he just felt like a bitch. He'd never been one for empty threats and he knew he couldn't have gone through with that one no matter how angry he got. Even...before he wouldn't have, had Inuyasha _had_ stripes.

Safe behind the wall his thoughts drifted over the memory of that training, of how proud he'd been when Inuyasha had succeeded, pushing the vain pup in the stream...

He drew a shaky breath. No more of that, and cleared his mind in preparation to sleep. He would need to thank Inuyasha for his offer of helping him look for Jaken at some point. Inuyasha hadn't had to try to help and while he didn't want anything from him, he likely wouldn't wind up with a choice when it came to removing the link.

He realized then that for the first time since the spell he couldn't sense Inuyasha. Even on the mountain he'd had an impression of aggression and dominance.

_Shit,_ he forced himself to his feet, every muscle protesting and set off following Inuyasha's scent, noting that at least there wasn't any fresh blood or fear in it. What was wrong then? Was he perhaps unconscious? He _had_ lost a lot of blood.

Inuyasha was deep in meditation when he caught his brother's scent, laced with worry. What the-? Was something wrong? Was Sesshomaru ok?

He jumped to his feet just as Sesshomaru came into his clearing. Surprise flooded through the link as worry made them drop their walls.

Inuyasha realized Sesshomaru hadn't been able to sense him, and had gotten worried. '_I just...I put up a wall like yours while I was meditating.'  
_  
Damn, he'd made Sesshomaru worry about him again! He hadn't meant to do that.

He sensed relief, and tilted his head. '_After ...everything, you were still worried about me?'_

Sesshomaru hesitated, casting his eyes aside, but the thought was clear, if uncertain-sounding. _'I think, from now on...I'll likely always worry about you, Inu-pup. Even when we're not getting along.'  
_  
Inuyasha was deeply touched, but swallowed it down the best he could. He wasn't sure what might tip the scales against him again. _'Same. But uhhh, look. I promised you space. So...I mean...I guess I better go?'  
_  
He started to turn away, intending to give the youkai his desired space, when Sesshomaru said his name out loud, "Inuyasha?"

He turned back, sensing indecision about whether they should reinstall their walls. '_You can stay. Perhaps some meditation would do me well.'  
_  
Slowly, Inuyasha sat on one side of the flat boulder, leaving space for his companion. Sesshomaru joined him, and they both sank into meditation.

_What the fuck does he want? No matter what I do I just piss him off. He was worried about me though that's a good sign right?_

**_I told you we should have gone with..._**

_Shut up._

Sesshomaru's eyes snapped open, oh _that_ had been a bad idea. He snapped his head to Inuyasha whose jaw was clenched and shook his shoulder as gently as he could.

Inuyasha's first thought was that his skin felt raw and sunburned with the remnants of a hundred small wounds not quite healed, his second thought was holy fuck his shoulder blade hurt, then other outside thoughts came.

_I want to. I enjoy his company, I should give him another chance. But I've given him plenty all he does is hu... So what? Am I scared? Yes._

Inuyasha felt himself falling off the rock and came back to reality to see Sesshomaru with a hand on his shoulder, steadying him, eyes wide with something near panic.

Seeing that look broke his heart. "Hey, I'm alright. Sorry, I didn't mean to see how you felt. I've been trying to stay out of the link."

The hand stayed on his shoulder. "Maybe meditating together without the walls is not a good idea right now."

Inuyasha nodded obediently, though his heart twinged. And they'd been closer than ever...he quickly shut the thought down, but saw Sesshomaru's eyes widen.

He spoke quickly, hoping to distract from that. "Hey, umm...I didn't mean to see, but I know your healing isn't quite up to speed? I can look at your shoulder, if you want?"  
_  
Please don't get mad at me for offering; I'm just worried like you are when I'm hurt._

"It will heal on its own but you may," Sesshomaru said wondering what else Inuyasha had seen.

Inuyasha carefully avoided thinking about the other thoughts he'd picked up as Sesshomaru removed his armor and slid the shoulder of his robe down to bare the wound.

Inuyasha swallowed as he got a good look at the three-inch hole piercing his brother's shoulder blade just above where the armor would end. He took a deep breath, ignoring the scent of blood and his demon's rather sudden interest in it.

_'It doesn't smell poisoned or infected with anything.'_

But Sesshomaru wouldn't be able to reach this on his own. He could treat it - no no no that was probably a bad idea, Sesshomaru wouldn't want -

_'It is ok, Inu-pup. I can see how bad it is through your eyes - treating it would help it heal. Go ahead.'  
_  
Inuyasha swallowed his nervousness, leaning close.

More carefully than he'd ever treated any of his own wounds, he licked the blood away, then licked from edge to center. He firmly ignored the taste of the youkai's blood, just hoping his hanyou saliva would help like it did with his own wounds.

**_Y'know, if you called me out, your saliva would be more healing._**

_Yeah, _no._ Don't even think about it. It doesn't need _that_ much help._

Sesshomaru's mental voice quietly cut into his thoughts. _'He actually has a point.'_

Inuyasha blinked, then frowned. "What did I say about you two agreeing?"

The older male's voice came again. _'Would you be able to control him?'_

Just as Inuyasha thought, '_I don't know._' The demon spoke a bit indignantly. **_I'd behave!_**

The demon pushed his own memory forward; prostrating himself before Sesshomaru and asking for forgiveness.

Inuyasha saw his brother nod, and he thought sternly, _Alright. But one wrong move and I swear I'm never letting you out again!_

**_Fine._**

Sesshomaru glanced over his shoulder as the scent of demon replaced the scent of hanyou. Glowing red eyes met his, and he wondered for a moment if this had been a good idea. He wasn't sure if he would be able to defend himself without hurting Inu-pup. If he had to choose between harming him and letting the demon have it's way…

His demonized brother gave what he assumed was meant to be a reassuring smile, but the wickedness of the changed features rather ruined the effect, making the smile appear threatening.

As he thought this, his hand drifting to Gekko, the smile faded a bit and the red eyes dropped from his, '**_Sorry'._**

The younger demon gently took hold of his shoulder, lengthened claws brushing his skin as the wound was treated with surprisingly careful licks. The pain faded, and he unconsciously breathed a sigh of relief.

After a few minutes, the demon sat back, eyeing the wound. '**_That'll help, but it's still not gonna be fun to heal.'  
_**  
Sesshomaru saw the blood-red eyes flick over the side of his neck, sensing a flash of desire and an urge to keep licking. Before he could react, Inuyasha had released his shoulder and the rough voice whispered through his thoughts. '**_Sorry. Again.'_**

The red gradually faded until Inuyasha's eyes were clear gold again. The pup lowered his eyes, shuddering slightly.

Sesshomaru watched as his brother pulled away, thoughts of blood and licking and touching swirled in his mind before the wall cut him off.

To his surprise, he was a little disappointed, almost hurt by the withdrawal. Then he remembered keeping his own wall up for days, while Inuyasha just watched helplessly.

"Are you alright Inu-pup?" he asked following the logic trail to the conclusion that the pup was hiding some perceived weakness or injury.

Inuyasha wouldn't quite meet his eyes as he replied softly, "Yeah I'm fine. I just...I was thinking 'bout stuff you don't want me thinking 'bout. Thought it might-" _keep you from getting mad,_ "-help if I just walled it off."

Sesshomaru nodded, for _now_ that was probably a good idea, _'Thank you._'**  
**  
Inuyasha nodded, venturing a smile and carefully lowering the wall a bit since he wasn't thinking Miroku-esque thoughts anymore. Sesshomaru thought he'd had a good idea and had thanked him.  
Once again, he felt they were building a fragile, precariously balanced peace.

Maybe this time, he wouldn't screw it up.

_'Relax Inu-pup,_' Sesshomaru tried to put aside his anger and laid a tentative hand on Inuyasha's shoulder, the pup seemed to like that.

Inuyasha smiled at the hand on his shoulder, sensing the thought that he seemed to like it, '_I do._'

Briefly, the thought of nuzzling the hand crossed his mind, but he shook his head with a chuckle as that was followed by an image of Sesshomaru tweaking his ear and telling him to behave.

The demon shook his head, and Inuyasha got the impression of comparing his ears to the stripes, _'They are sensitive. I would not hurt them._'

For just an instant, Sesshomaru thought of Inuyasha's nightmare, when the dream-demon had dug his claws in and hauled him to his feet by the ear.

He felt his ears tilt back defensively, then Sesshomaru spoke gently, "I wouldn't do that."

_I swear I'll burn your stripes off, _Inuyasha shivered a little at the unwanted memory.

Sesshomaru sighed embarrassed, _I was bluffing._

Inuyasha's eyes widened in shock, "You…you what?"

Yet he could tell from the link that his brother was being truthful.

Annoyance.

Inuyasha cast about for a way to change the subject, "I know. Hey, you still wanna meditate? We can put our walls up if you want? I dunno 'bout you, but I need to heal, and meditation will help."

_'You start,'_ Sesshomaru offered, doubting the pup wanted him to see his mind any more than Sesshomaru wanted Inuyasha in his. He waited for the link to go blank before joining.


End file.
